Intimacy: Yikes!

Yikes!

By Anonymous - 31/08/2010 05:21 - United States

Today, I talked to my boyfriend's dad for the first time. One of the first things that he said to me was, "So, I hear you're a screamer." FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 242

You deserved it 7 246

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Same thing different taste

By nacho - 24/01/2012 06:42 - United States

Today, my boyfriend met my dad for the first time. The first thing he said to him was, "You're an idiot for dating my daughter." FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 073

You deserved it 4 330

By leahrb - 24/02/2016 18:55 - United States - Wilmington

Today, my boyfriend came over for the first time to meet my parents. The first words out of my dad's mouth were, "Son, I want you to suck upon my nipples of knowledge." FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 336

You deserved it 1 886

By mydadsgonnakillme - 08/02/2013 07:13 - United States - Santa Barbara

Today, I introduced my boyfriend to my overprotective father. My boyfriend started out with, "Sir, it is an honor to be your daughter's sexual partner." FML

I agree, your life sucks 64 546

You deserved it 12 432

By Anonymous - 22/05/2010 23:22 - United States

Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, my dad called my cell. He ended the phone call with, "and tell your boyfriend to shut up, I can hear him moaning." FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 580

You deserved it 47 168

What a dick

By Anonymous - 03/11/2011 07:29 - United States

Today, I ran into my boyfriend's dad. His exact words were, "Call me when you're ready to feel what a real man can do to you." FML

I agree, your life sucks 69 687

You deserved it 5 159

By Bucko321 - 30/03/2009 01:18 - Canada

Today, I was on the phone with my boyfriend. We were feeling a little naughty, so we started talking dirty. I was really into describing a sweaty sex scene, when I heard my dad cough. He had picked up the phone to make a call and had heard it all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 707

You deserved it 78 245

By anon - 16/03/2015 04:10 - Canada - Mississauga

Today, I met my boyfriend's parents for the first time. I thought everything went well, until I got a text from him later saying, "Come on mom, she isn't THAT bad." FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 747

You deserved it 2 588

Welcome to hell

By Anonymous - 14/01/2021 15:01 - Canada - Edmonton

Today, after meeting my boyfriend's family for the first time, I found out that he, his sister and their father enjoy talking loudly over the person who is currently talking, because what anyone else says is not worth listening to. FML

I agree, your life sucks 966

You deserved it 105

Love and threats

By soontobedumped - 15/01/2012 19:26 - United States

Today, I introduced my boyfriend of two weeks to my parents. My dad asked me to leave the room so they could have some "guy talk". I eavesdropped, only to hear the words "sex-crazed fuck" and a threat to stick bamboo shoots under my boyfriend's fingernails if he ever hurt me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 868

You deserved it 4 876

Thin walls

By xtilltheendx - 05/10/2020 20:08 - United States

Today, I had to have an awkward conversation with my parents when they told me they were able to hear me and my boyfriend having sex at night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 542

You deserved it 1 381

InuYasha17 0

Tuesday 31 August 2010 12:05

Awkward... o_o

Chunchunchun 3

Tuesday 31 August 2010 12:05

Need to chew your boyfriend out for that...

Comments

triggerit 5

Tuesday 31 August 2010 16:16

op your bf is an idiot.... his father is an idiot twice...

AtrumMessor 1

Tuesday 31 August 2010 16:44

YDI for dating the kind of douche who would discuss your "private" life so crassly with his dad...

partyman007 0

Tuesday 31 August 2010 16:47

so are you?

phorcep 0

Tuesday 31 August 2010 16:56

I get this weird feeling that your boyfriend and his father live in a trailer down by the river and watch lots of NASCAR.

ajilocks 0

Tuesday 31 August 2010 16:58

how does he know?

remy3106 10

Tuesday 31 August 2010 16:59

either he heard them or the bf told the dad

Daerauko 0

Tuesday 31 August 2010 19:44

lol she starred in a ****?

skyeyez9 24

Tuesday 31 August 2010 17:09

OP, leave now! The dad sounds like a creeper. Seriously, a normal parent does not say something like that to their child's bf or gf.

oldenuff2party 3

Tuesday 31 August 2010 17:25

sounds to me like the dad wants a piece

Danizike 0

Tuesday 31 August 2010 17:57

If I were you I'd start slowly walking away at that point...

scooter69 0

Tuesday 31 August 2010 18:15

that's awkward...

5t3ff1k4h 44

Tuesday 31 August 2010 19:36

Icebreaker. Either your boyfriend's dishing out way too much information, or you were too loud one of those nights at his house.

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The Top

Today, after having sexual intercourse with my boyfriend, we went downstairs to find his parents had come home early and had heard everything. I then received a long scolding from his mother of how I'd disrespected her house. My boyfriend received a high-five and a thumbs-up from his dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 024

You deserved it 5 457

Today, I woke up late. My grandparents had slept over the night before, but they usually leave early. I heard someone in the kitchen and, thinking it was my brother, I said, "Thank god, the geriatric crew is FINALLY gone." My grandma then responded, "No, we're not." FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 496

You deserved it 74 249

The Top

Today, I had a dream about sleeping, which is a dream I have frequently. I’m exhausted even when I sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 553

You deserved it 142

Today, I had the most action in months when I woke up to a wet dream. I'm married, I guess that tells you all about my sex life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 985

You deserved it 160

Today, I took a flight from Seattle to Oregon but missed my flight back home to California because the flight attendant came in late and delayed our flight take off time. Then I was told the only way to get California was to go back to Seattle and fly to California from there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 902

You deserved it 130

Today, I injured myself in the geekiest way possible; I managed to crush my nipple while closing my laptop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 126

You deserved it 7 227

Today, my boyfriend cooked us a romantic dinner using the oven. The oven he recently hid $3,000 in for safekeeping. We essentially just spent thousands of dollars on a casserole. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 857

You deserved it 12 585

Today, I realized how self-absorbed my mother is when she came to visit, and was so upset at my sibling over a non-issue that she didn't notice I was high so I wouldn't have to remember anything she said. I was hoping for a healthier relationship with my family. FML

I agree, your life sucks 565

You deserved it 228