Intimacy, Embarrassing, Awkward and Contraception: Why would you stick that there?

Why would you stick that there?

By Co-B - 03/09/2009 20:59 - United States

Today, my girlfriend reached into my pocket to get my keys so she could get something out of my car. When she yanked them out, the condom that we'd just used flew up into the air and landed on the floor in front of her entire family. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 872

You deserved it 61 035

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Same thing different taste

Rushed

By Anonymous - 31/05/2012 20:53 - Canada - Courtenay

Today, in a rush to get my clothes back on at my girlfriend's house at the sound of her parents opening the front door, I forgot to take the condom off. Her dad watched it fall out of my pant leg and onto the kitchen floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 660

You deserved it 44 686

By Anonymous - 15/01/2011 10:19 - United Kingdom

Today, I was at my girlfriends house. After having sex, we went downstairs to where the rest of the family was. At this point I did not realise that I had a used condom stuck to my foot. The family did. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 894

You deserved it 40 455

By badluckdrew - 01/05/2009 14:28 - United States

Today, my girlfriend's mother called her in the bedroom for a serious talk. I overheard them arguing and yelling at each other. It turns out her mother found a condom next to her garbage. We got caught because her cat swallowed the condom and threw it up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 556

You deserved it 20 634

By PCJJacket - 05/05/2014 17:30 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, I had sex with my girlfriend while my parents were out. After they got home, my dog brought out our used condom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 202

You deserved it 26 142

By omgdesdes - 16/11/2014 01:29 - United States - Casselberry

Today, after having sex with my boyfriend, he triumphantly flung the condom to the ceiling, only to have it come down and smack me in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 700

You deserved it 6 000

Missing

By Anon - 04/08/2013 05:36 - Australia - Perth

Today, my girlfriend's dad pulled out the chocolate-flavoured condom that went missing under the couch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 645

You deserved it 20 278

By Rob - 06/06/2012 16:02 - United States - Neoga

Today, after having sex with my girlfriend, I jokingly held the condom above my mouth. Somehow, the condom busted, and everything went over my face. Worse still, we're now wondering just how safe this condom really was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 745

You deserved it 42 610

By Tucker - 18/11/2009 21:35 - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I were sitting downstairs with my mom. We heard the dog running around upstairs and called it down. It came running down the stairs. With a used condom in its mouth. The same condom my girlfriend and I lost two weeks ago. It put it directly in my mom's hands. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 451

You deserved it 8 786

By Brian - 04/05/2009 23:27 - United States

Today, I had my first real meeting with my girlfriend's parents. We had dinner at a pretty upscale restaurant and everything was going great. When the check came, I offered to pay and I stood up to take out my wallet. When I opened it, 3 condoms fell out on the table in front of them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 542

You deserved it 64 559

By Otherguy - 18/11/2008 07:36 - France

Today, I was at a restaurant with a girl I like, and as I was getting my wallet out, I dropped a condom. She didn't see anything, and I didn't dare pick it up in case I drew attention to the "object". The waiter walked past, picked up, and held it out to me with a huge grin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 972

You deserved it 9 411

CherishFlowers 0

Friday 4 September 2009 1:09

Eww... don't keep it in your pocket.

DameGreyWulf 0

Friday 4 September 2009 1:10

OH WELL... uh, at least they know you're safe!

Comments

youlose_ 0

Friday 4 September 2009 8:22

souvenirs, anyone?? =]

Htownmichigan 0

Friday 4 September 2009 8:42

Lotion 4 later! That's awesome!!! Hahaha XD

cocky 0

Friday 4 September 2009 9:05

Used condom.. in your pocket? WTF. Moron.

Azura94 0

Friday 4 September 2009 9:17

Looks like  and  were tryin to prevent making  Oh i love this spell number app.

onyxindigo 0

Friday 4 September 2009 9:29

Yuck, why the **** would you put it in your pocket ?! Even if it was tied it'd have ****** juice all over it. Disgusting, YTDI

tenkenshi 2

Friday 4 September 2009 9:49

lol ****** juice. I'm sure he wouldn't mind it being in his pocket if he was willing to have sex with her.

MiseryMan 0

Friday 4 September 2009 10:07

I keep all my used condoms for sentimental value. Is that weird?

jaaxx_fml 0

Friday 4 September 2009 10:24

I personally wrap my condoms in toilet paper and wet it so when it drys it appears to be a ball of toilet paper in the garbage not a used condom

kokalade 0

Friday 4 September 2009 11:31

Who the hell keeps a used condom in his pocket :S

funny_as_f00ck 0

Friday 4 September 2009 11:37

You should have said "Any one thirsty?"

deliapearl 0

Friday 4 September 2009 11:57

Keep yo hands outta my pocket!!!

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I agree, your life sucks 29 155

You deserved it 6 757

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I agree, your life sucks 76 121

You deserved it 6 710

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I agree, your life sucks 26 548

You deserved it 8 373

Today, at work while on the toilet, somebody came into the stall next to me and gave a loud play by play of every fart, plop, and grunt. He then asked loudly who I was and when I didn't answer put his head under the stall to look at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 048

You deserved it 3 548

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I agree, your life sucks 315

You deserved it 120

Why would you stick that there?

Same thing different taste

Rushed

Missing

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