Love: Today, the guy I've been sleeping with for the last three weeks...

By TheOtherWoman - 20/07/2009 07:10 - United States

Today, the guy I've been sleeping with for the last three weeks got really drunk. I drove him home from the party and took care of him. At 2am he asked for the phone. When I asked what for, he said he wanted to drunk dial his girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 008

You deserved it 12 784

May Day: Lily of the Valley and Misunderstandings
When lilies of the valley bring good luck... or not! Discover the stories behind every little bell! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Let down

By MoxyR12 - 24/06/2009 15:33 - United States

Today, I was texting this guy that I really liked. Things were going pretty well. I got a call from his number and excitedly answered it. It was his girlfriend asking if he was bothering me because he likes to text random people when he's drunk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 802

You deserved it 5 707

By Amy (grossed out) - 27/04/2014 13:43 - Australia - Adelaide

Today, my long-distance boyfriend got extremely drunk and insisted that we left the Skype call on all night so it was like I was there with him. I woke up to the sound of him vomiting loudly at 3am. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 717

You deserved it 6 061

By Anonymous - 15/05/2013 20:21 - United States

Today, I was woken up by my drunk girlfriend calling me and saying how much she loves me. She then stopped to tell the guy she was in bed with to be quiet because I might hear him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 69 649

You deserved it 4 567

The Phone Call

By turnmyphoneoff - 24/09/2019 00:01

Today, I got a drunken call from my boyfriend, which consisted of him telling me that he, "does man things like fuck bitches and roll with hoes," and that I've been, "trying to turn him into a half-ass girly man," but, "that shit ain't right." Then he threw up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 946

You deserved it 210

Explain yourself

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - France

Today, I received a text message from my wife, who had gone out for the evening with some girlfriends, saying, "I have to take a friend home, she's drunk! I'll be staying at his place. Call you in the morning." Umm… His? FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 196

You deserved it 4 579

We're all proud of him

By Anonymous - 25/02/2022 04:59 - Ireland - Dublin

Today, my boyfriend video-called me in the middle of the night, drunk after a night out of partying. He told me that he was chatted up by a girl and proudly exclaimed that he told her off, given his status, all the while showing large hickeys on his neck. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 018

You deserved it 89

By Aus - 26/04/2012 14:43 - United States

Today, I received a text from the guy I'm into, thanking me for helping him drunkenly stumble back to his apartment last night. He ended it with, "How long did you stay?" Apparently, he doesn't remember confessing his secret love for me, or the fantastic kiss that followed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 005

You deserved it 4 201

By rachaaaaeul - 06/08/2010 07:07 - United States

Today, I was texting my boyfriend about yesterday, where he told me how much he loved me, and he wishes we lived closer. I asked him if he really meant it. Turns out he was drunk, and had no idea what he was talking about. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 065

You deserved it 4 019

By Clader - 10/12/2008 03:09 - France

Today, it's 2:23 in the morning, and my drunken girlfriend has just rung me up from a party where she's the only girl there. She seems to be having a great time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 612

You deserved it 2 882

By paulinapo - 30/05/2013 01:53 - United States - Staten Island

Today, I woke up in bed with a one-night stand. We got really drunk the night before so I went to make a hangover-cure breakfast. Apparently he was so drunk that he didn't remember me, and when he came to the kitchen, he knocked me out with a pan and called the cops. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 311

You deserved it 9 827

lexiBRo 0

Monday 20 July 2009 16:17

Well.. that sucks, esp. for his g/f, but can you really expect anything out of a guy you are just casually sleeping with???

fuckitfuckitfuck 0

Monday 20 July 2009 16:39

saw that coming halfway through the first sentence. it was probably the fact that you referred to him as the guy you've been sleeping with, as opposed to your boyfriend. this isn't an FML. this is a "I can't believe it took you that long to figure it out."

Comments

NightWatchmen87 0

Tuesday 21 July 2009 12:17

why are you upset? you're slutting yourself off to him and you care if he has a gf? try to be someones gf before you ride the dick next time! ydi!

Bullshet 0

Tuesday 21 July 2009 19:04

That's what comes with casual sex, so why are you surprised? YDI

Zwink 0

Tuesday 21 July 2009 20:01

maybe he was so drunk that he didn't realize you were there

Brittanii 0

Wednesday 22 July 2009 5:36

fuckk. is wrongg. widd. uu... fa doinn thtt. dude was playinn u da whole time I k o datt. hurtsz

NoteMyGrin 0

Friday 24 July 2009 1:42

Haha; maybe he had forgotten who you were and YOU were the girlfriend he was referring to? But yea, if all you were doing was having casual sex with him, I'm surprised that you expected anything different.

WorldsBestSecret 0

Friday 24 July 2009 7:54

FYL. Sounds like you need a new bf. Where in MN are you? Wait, that would mean I am a loser.. FML too.

kawaiisakura 12

Saturday 30 March 2013 4:21

They aren't dating. They are just sleeping together...

yumpinyiminy 0

Sunday 26 July 2009 23:03

If you were a guy, these people would probably be talking shit about the "****" girl who didn't tell you she had a boyfriend. But, since you're female, they've all decided that you're a ****, therefore don't deserve sympathy or respect from anybody. I feel bad for you, what a way to find out this guy has a girlfriend. At least now you know, so you can cut this douchebag loose.

sickinlove13 0

Monday 27 July 2009 15:54

What a creep! I hope you kicked him out of the car.

murderofcrows 0

Sunday 9 August 2009 6:47

I love how big of losers are on this site. The fact that you write paragraphs analyzing a silly anecdote on a website shows you really have no life. If you aren't liked irl, you're not going to find ppl who like you online, bringing me to my point, nobody ******* cares about your drawn out analysis. Seriously. Just read it and laugh and move on.