Intimacy: Today, my wife asked me to pop an ingrown hair near her crotch....

By GettingNone - 25/06/2009 03:05 - France

Today, my wife asked me to pop an ingrown hair near her crotch. We haven't had sex since last September. Popping her ingrown hair was the closest I've gotten to my wife's vagina in nearly nine months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 73 308

You deserved it 6 236

May weddings: Love and blunders
Weddings are supposed to be perfect, but our stories show that perfection can sometimes be... surprising! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Iswearihavegoodhygiene - 04/11/2018 05:00

Today, I popped a zit that had formed around an ingrown hair "down there". It popped with so much force, the pus hit me in the forehead. Still can't get the hair out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 229

You deserved it 268

Girl, DIY

By Anonymous - 23/06/2023 03:00

Today, my wife yelled at me to "just stick it up her ass already." No, not for anal sex, it was a suppository she got from the doctor. This is the closest I’ve been to sex in 2 years, since she decided we were done having sex and won’t even explain why when I ask. We’re only in our 30s. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 126

You deserved it 177

Bad timing, hun

By Anonymous - 19/01/2023 22:00

Today, I just had surgery and my wife finally wants to have sex. Not that there haven't been enough other days in the previous years of marriage… FML

I agree, your life sucks 964

You deserved it 170

Ding dong

By Anonymous - 20/11/2020 17:04 - United States - El Macero

Today, I got an ingrown hair. It wouldn’t be so bad, if it were anywhere other than my penis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 958

You deserved it 137

Smash the patriarchy

By Anonymous - 19/04/2022 06:00

Today, my boyfriend started avoiding going down on me ever since he found an ingrowing hair down there. The only reason I have an ingrowing hair is because he didn’t like my pubes, and stopped having sex with me at all until I shaved it off, thus causing the ingrowing hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 292

You deserved it 341

Bailed out

By Why's it so cold in here? - 01/02/2015 18:13 - United States

Today, after getting home from being in the field for a week, my wife who's a nurse, convinced me I had a spider bite on my penis. After rushing to the ER and standing nude in a cold exam room while the ER staff checked me out, I learned it's just an ingrown hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 822

You deserved it 2 977

Do ya think I'm sexy?

By wifelyduties - 17/04/2020 14:00

Today, my husband called me to our bedroom, saying he needed help with something. I found him sitting on the bed with his pants down, so I smiled and asked if he was angling for sex, which was fine with me. Nope. He needed me to pop a pimple under his ballsack. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 207

You deserved it 346

By Anonymous - 14/08/2016 06:16 - United States - Warrensburg

Today, I shaved my vagina for the first time ever. Had sex with my husband and then asked if he liked that. He said, "You've done that before, though". I haven't. We've been married 15 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 310

You deserved it 1 830

So frustrating!

By Marvin-jones - 02/03/2023 02:00

Today, my wife accused me of using her for sex. I'd only just admitted to her two days ago that I've been struggling to get it up to try and perform, after a hospital stay and a month of almost no sexual contact. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 042

You deserved it 129

By poor excuse for a father - 27/10/2018 14:00

Today, my wife is out of the country so my daughter asked me for help. She'd tried waxing her "private bits" but it hurt too much so she left the strip stuck down there for nearly two days. I was so unable to handle the situation, I called my wife crying and begging her to come home and deal with it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 819

You deserved it 718

itsnotmytree 0

Thursday 25 June 2009 12:11

How the hell do you go that long without sex? I'm married and we don't go more than 2 or 3 days, even when we're sick. This is after four years, too.

surreal 0

Thursday 25 June 2009 12:12

That sucks! You know the romance is gone when your wife asks you to pop an ingrown hair. Near her ******.

Comments

hopeless429 0

Friday 26 June 2009 3:52

that sucks you need to talk to her

crazy_cat_lady 0

Friday 26 June 2009 4:56

You really need to learn how to eat pussy. I didn't sleep with my man for a while because I was never satisfied. And what's the point of me giving it up to him when there's NOTHING in it for me? Then, he watched a bunch of "movies" and studied, and now he has a REALLY GREAT technique, and now I'm all over him, doing anything I can just to get some bomb service in return.

FarSide 22

Friday 26 June 2009 5:21

I think sticking my face in front of a pus-filled ingrown pubic hair might turn me **** for the next 12 months.

podrummer9209 0

Friday 26 June 2009 5:58

70, you win. EPIC REBUKE!

DeathByIrony90 0

Friday 26 June 2009 6:01

FYL, Dude, I'd rather be in no relationship at all (as I am now) than trapped in a loveless and sexless marriage! And being from France, I bet she doesn't shave or use deodorant either, FYL EVEN MORE!!! (J/k about that last part, but it's half-true)

little_one 20

Friday 26 June 2009 6:05

In a loving relationship things like popping and ingrown hair should be no big deal. Hell I go to the washroom infront of my fiance and it's no biggy. What is a big deal is not having sex. try pleasing her and then maybe you might rekindle the love, also maybe get some toys or a sexy outfit! Get a sex swing or a sex ramp (the ramp is good for hitting the special spots ) ;) seriously get out there and try new things!!! it makes sex fun and enjoyable.

love_is_pain 0

Friday 26 June 2009 7:35

# 31 lmao hahahah but dude that does suck u should talk to her

HumansSuck 0

Friday 26 June 2009 8:30

Why couldn't she pop it herself? And why the hell aren't you having sex? Go to marriage counseling, now.

HumansSuck 0

Friday 26 June 2009 8:32

You don't want your parents not to have sex, they'll end up like my parents :(

ecilart 0

Friday 26 June 2009 9:03

but the thing is, oftentimes a woman's sexual drive decreases AFTER the pregnancy, it's like nature's way of making sure she doesn't get pregnant again right after birth