Love: Today, my friends and I went to the strip club for my birthday.... - FML

By assante2010 - 24/07/2011 00:09 - United States

Today, my friends and I went to the strip club for my birthday. I now know how my sister is paying for her new car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 349

You deserved it 6 882

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

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Same thing different taste

Thanks, I hate it

By Anonymous - 11/12/2009 16:52 - United States

Today, it's my birthday and my friends and I went to our favorite pub to celebrate. As I'm a little broke at the moment, they all offered to buy me birthday drinks. Which I later learned meant that they would order them for me and bring them to the table, but put everything on my tab. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 537

You deserved it 2 916

By BMTH2296 - 21/03/2014 23:42 - United States

Today, I realized how sad my life is when for my 18th birthday, I went to a strip club, by myself, in GTA V. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 397

You deserved it 8 418

By bluntedone - 03/02/2009 04:42 - United States

Today, I spent $400 at the stripclub and got 4 phone numbers. I as walked out of the club, I noticed it was trans-night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 034

You deserved it 52 141

Quite the gamble

By Anonymous - 25/03/2011 19:25 - United States

Today, to celebrate my older sister's 21st birthday, my parents forced me to take the night off work so we could all go to the casino. Not only is this coming out of my vacation, I wasn't old enough to enter the casino, so I had to sit in the car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 824

You deserved it 4 435

By obese_chicken - 06/11/2009 06:59 - Australia

Today, I went out to celebrate my birthday with a big group of friends. After waiting in line to get into a club, the bouncer looked me up and down and said, "No fat chicks." My friends went into the club without me and left me to take a $100 taxi home alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 053

You deserved it 8 323

By abc - 27/05/2009 10:15 - Pakistan

Today, I took my friends out to an expensive restaurant for my birthday treat. They had arranged for a surprise birthday cake for me which I cut, very happily, while they chanted birthday wishes. When the bill came, I discovered I was supposed to pay for my great 'surprise' cake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 413

You deserved it 5 360

By happy bday - 17/09/2010 04:02 - Canada

Today, is my 21st birthday. My friends took me to a bar to celebrate, knowing I don't drink. I am now in charge of driving my friends home after they had an awesome night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 993

You deserved it 9 388

How can I make this about me?

By Anonymous - 04/02/2022 18:01

Today, it's my birthday. My wife took me to my favorite restaurant for dinner. She made me pay for my birthday dinner, along with hers. She also got me a gift card to HER favorite store. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 098

You deserved it 163

By azmom - 27/03/2012 17:51 - United States - Phoenix

Today, I dropped off my 19 year old daughter at her first job. It's at a strip club. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 314

You deserved it 26 211

By Anonymous - 14/04/2012 04:57 - United States - Paducah

Today, it was my 16th birthday. My surprise was a new car, that is now in the side of the garage because my mom lost control while driving it around front. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 022

You deserved it 4 324

Next

Top comments

BIEBERSLAYER 10

Sunday 24 July 2011 9:22

please tell me you didn't get a lap dance from her.

HahaYDI 0

Sunday 24 July 2011 9:24

Did you get some sort of family discount?

Comments

Rand0mPlaces 0

Sunday 24 July 2011 10:12

there's going to be one awkward family reunion

youdontevenknow0 0

Sunday 24 July 2011 10:21

is she hot at least?

cindayy77 0

Sunday 24 July 2011 10:27

that sucks..

pwned3 0

Sunday 24 July 2011 10:28

is she hot???

SinT2011 0

Sunday 24 July 2011 10:30

which strip club? so that we can all go to Maine! ;)

DinoJess 0

Sunday 24 July 2011 10:43

wooah, this happened in Maine?! finally something interesting happened here!!

jaff23 11

Sunday 24 July 2011 10:33

help her get a new job. don't let her sell her body anymore

Absurd101 0

Monday 25 July 2011 19:46

ignore 108 instead; ask for a family discount on a lapdance

sweet_candy_ 17

Sunday 24 July 2011 10:36

Haha this fml reminds me of a joke. An 18 year old boy goes to a strip club his mom gets mad at him. She asks"did you see anything you werent supposed to see?" the boy said "yeah...dad "

mustasho 0

Sunday 24 July 2011 10:38

Maybe shes a bartender there and one of the girls couldent go in that day? :O

Darlingnicci 0

Sunday 24 July 2011 10:39

Nice! Nothing like that has happened to me yet, although i did see an old co-worker one time.

noseyneighbour 0

Sunday 24 July 2011 10:41

now that would be a birthday surprise!

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Keywords

Gamers Annoying Video games Money Birthday Cute Kids Weird Awkward Love Health Abuse Relatable Social Media Scams Education Parents School Anger issues Teenagers Family Relationship advice Capitalism Miscellaneous Public freakouts Mental health Grieving Music Geek Poopoo peepee

The Top

Today, one of my roommates blew a fuse by running a personal heater on full overnight. I notified our landlady that I had to get a new fuse; she came over to pay me for it. Only as I heard landlady's horn did I see another roommate's girlfriend's car; she stayed overnight and isn't allowed to. Both roomies got evicted and blamed me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 447

You deserved it 91

Today, I was driving to visit my parents for the first time in two years. After spending about $4000 to make sure my car wouldn't break down on the journey, around the halfway point, the front tire popped and the engine blew out. I'm about 5 states away from both my parents and my home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 732

You deserved it 489

The Top

Today, my mom and dad went to court to negotiate child support for me and my brothers. During the meeting, my dad was asked, "Sir, are you saying that the only reason you want your sons to live with you full time is so you don't have to pay child support?" To which he responded, "Yes." FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 246

You deserved it 1 572

Today, my girlfriend decided that having OCD will help her lose weight. She is now convinced that walking in and out of doorways multiple times will burn fat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 068

You deserved it 2 406

Today, I found out the love of my life, my husband, is cheating on me. When I confronted him about it, his response was, "Don't blame me, you're the gullible bitch." FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 503

You deserved it 4 000

Today, I got asked out for the second time in my life. Since my first date didn't go so well I thought I might have better luck with a different guy. I had to end the date when he confessed it was his destiny to kill his father. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 969

You deserved it 2 798

Today, I came home from vacation, only to find my neighbours relaxing on my patio, and their kids swimming in my pool. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 563

You deserved it 4 635

Today, I went to a family reunion with my brother and my mother. She spent quite a while giving a glowing introduction for my brother to one of her cousins. Then, just before walking off, she jerked a thumb in my direction and said, "Oh, yeah, and that's his sister." FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 086

You deserved it 1 337