Love: Today, my boyfriend and I were lying in bed together, and I was...

By Anonymous - 01/04/2011 04:32 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were lying in bed together, and I was in a snuggly mood. I rolled over to gaze lovingly into his eyes and whisper sweet nothings to him in the darkness. His response? "Dear God! Did somebody fart in your mouth?!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 727

You deserved it 36 347

May Day: Lily of the Valley and Misunderstandings
When lilies of the valley bring good luck... or not! Discover the stories behind every little bell! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 06/10/2011 15:23 - United States

Today, while my boyfriend was asleep, I gave him a soft kiss and whispered how handsome and gentle he looked. His response, still asleep, was to roll over and let out a massive fart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 876

You deserved it 11 301

By byebyeromance - 26/08/2014 01:03 - United States - State College

Today, I was cuddling my boyfriend before going to bed. He farted really loud and spat in my face as he laughed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 297

You deserved it 5 061

By Anonymous - 30/11/2009 07:37 - United States

Today, I woke up to find my boyfriend watching me sleep. I asked him if he was staring at me because he was in love. He replied that it was because my farting wouldn't let him sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 777

You deserved it 13 968

Classy

By Anonymous - 12/01/2013 20:12 - United Kingdom - Bristol

Today, I spontaneously poured my heart out for my boyfriend, telling him how much I love and adore him. He answered by leaning in close, saying, "Jolly good" in an affected accent, and burping loud and clear in my ear. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 479

You deserved it 5 080

By fartlover - 27/11/2009 05:10 - Canada

Today, I went over to my boyfriend's apartment and I smelled a delicious aroma as I walked in so I asked him what he was cooking. His response was, "I'm not cooking anything. I just farted." FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 299

You deserved it 8 639

By GasAttack - 07/09/2009 13:32 - Canada

Today, I was taking a shower. I heard my boyfriend come into the bathroom, brush his teeth and take off his clothes. He joined me in the shower and instead of doing something loving or sexy, he let out a huge fart into his hand and threw it into my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 454

You deserved it 8 529

By Wow - 11/04/2013 12:52 - United States

Today, my boyfriend fell asleep while watching TV. I thought it would be cute to try to kiss him awake like they do in the movies. He farted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 247

You deserved it 19 303

By Dramaqueenfornothing - 27/04/2016 22:32 - South Africa - Cape Town

Today, while being intimate with my future husband, I reached over to stroke his cheek. The light behind him cast a shadow over my chest, and it scared me so much, I screamed then I farted on him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 340

You deserved it 2 811

By Sybille - 06/12/2008 12:14 - France

Today, my boyfriend was laying down on top of me and he was looking at me with passion in his eyes. I thought he was finally going to tell me that he loved me. Instead, he said, "You have a booger." FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 512

You deserved it 4 063

Love is in the air

By Rydia - 31/10/2020 05:01

Today, my fiancé hugged me so tight that I couldn't move, said he loved me, let out a loud, obnoxious and smelly fart cloud and made me breathe it in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 957

You deserved it 194

TheNewGuy03 28

Friday 1 April 2011 11:57

damn, girl, brush yo teefs! |the kid|

mintcar 9

Friday 1 April 2011 12:00

YDI for smelly breath. Although, he could've been a lot nicer about it.

Comments

dbaybeeh 0

Saturday 2 April 2011 0:54

ewww dats nasty rite there lOl

Blondiebee88 0

Saturday 2 April 2011 2:55

I just don't get women who love jerks like this!

ChiZah 0

Saturday 2 April 2011 6:33

lmmfaooo i wish i could have seen the look on your face

JoNaThAn135 0

Saturday 2 April 2011 6:36

how did u gaze into his eyes in the darkness

vulcar123 2

Saturday 2 April 2011 7:59

rofl

alex182011 0

Saturday 2 April 2011 8:20

tooth brush?...tooth past?...mints?..mouth wash?..need I say more ? lol

sk8erd 15

Saturday 2 April 2011 9:01

little word of advice: freshen up your mouth after dinner or so

Viciousvixen_21 0

Saturday 2 April 2011 10:11

Ur disgusting for not brushing ur teeth. Do u suck his dick with that mouth?

denvan 0

Saturday 2 April 2011 11:23

Sounds like an Orbit moment. Farted in mouth dirty teeth chew orbit and smile

don1qot 6

Saturday 2 April 2011 12:02

Wow, shitty-ass way to get **** blocked. Op , ydi--LYAO(laughing your ass off)--in his face!

Keywords

Gamers Annoying Video games Abuse Birthday Relatable Scams Social Media Money School Kids Education Parents Public freakouts Health Mental health Grieving Geek Music Poopoo peepee Awkward Jewelry Bikes Cops Transportation Fight Family Work Gross Customers

The Top

Today, after spotting my ex-boyfriend's truck in a desolate parking lot, I decided to "decorate" the muddy side of it with a rather large male appendage. After checking around me to make sure there were no witnesses, I got to work. I probably should have made sure he wasn't sitting in the truck. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 280

You deserved it 49 809

Today, I learned that dirty talk does NOT get me off. My boyfriend and I were having sex and I said, "I'm going to come" during the beginning of my orgasm. My orgasm immediately stopped right after I said that. I'd managed to turn myself off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 338

You deserved it 15 971

The Top

Today, I was at my grandfather's house and my car was low on gas. He said I could put some of his gas in my car. He accidentally gave me the wrong tank to pump it out of, and I put fuel in my car that he uses for his small plane. It never ran better until the engine exploded. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 558

You deserved it 3 871

Today, I finally met the cute guy I've been seeing around town. Bad news is, I was drunk off my ass, and when he told me his name, I burst out laughing because it's the same as my puppy's. He did not take it well. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 335

You deserved it 37 321

Today, I was reading through a local wedding mag's advice page. A mother-in-law to be was writing about how to handle wanting her son to break off his engagement. I thought, "Wow. That must suck. I'm glad I like my mother-in-law to be." And then I saw her name. FML

I agree, your life sucks 74 803

You deserved it 3 477

Today, while playing badminton at school, I got an opponent who is mentally handicapped. Since I'm terrible at the game, I guess the teacher assumed it would be a good match. I won the match, my first victory ever. My teacher accused me of cheating to humiliate him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 053

You deserved it 4 475

Today, I made fun of a girl singing passionately along to a song on her radio while in traffic next to me. She decided that her chocolate milkshake would make a good addition to my brand new seat covers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 092

You deserved it 81 570

Today, I was diagnosed with intermittent explosive disorder, meaning that I involuntarily fly into a rage without provocation. It's only controlled by healthy eating and sleeping. I work too much to get any sleep, I don't make enough money to eat well, and my disorder limits my ability to find a job that pays more. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 694

You deserved it 334

Same thing different taste

Classy

Love is in the air

Top comments

Comments