Work: Today, my boss became obsessed with a movie about a pimp. He...

By kufan1324 - 05/06/2012 03:47 - United States

Today, my boss became obsessed with a movie about a pimp. He now refers to all my female coworkers as his "bitches" and refuses to treat us like human beings. Whenever we make a mistake, he rolls his eyes and laughs, "So typical of a prostie." FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 175

You deserved it 3 334

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Same thing different taste

Creep in chief

By wow @ creepy fuckers - 17/11/2012 01:06 - United States

Today, yet again, my boss whined to me like a baby over being "friend-zoned" by his secretary. Not only does he basically stalk her and make her eat lunch with him every day, she's a lesbian in a committed relationship. He suspended me after I lost it and told him to see a fucking therapist. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 153

You deserved it 6 145

By Anonymous - 24/11/2010 19:34 - United States

Today, my boss sent me to a meeting with a client I've never met to do some damage control and renegotiate his contract. For two hours, he alternated between threatening to sue us, and making vulgar comments about raping me in his office. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 156

You deserved it 3 175

By Anonymous - 31/08/2012 23:16 - United States - Lancaster

Today, I had my boss over for dinner. Knowing that I was angling for a promotion, my fifteen-year-old son spent the dinner uttering lines such as "What's the point of showering before bed?" and "Bitches ain't shit but hoes and tricks." My boss was not impressed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 144

You deserved it 4 921

Make up your mind

By choke on a dick, sir - 01/11/2013 22:47 - United States - Portland

Today, my boss came around to my way of thinking. He called our customers a "bunch of assholes" and to kick them out if they gave me trouble. When a lady began yelling at me for "setting the damn prices too high" I told her to leave. My boss soon bitched me out for being unprofessional. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 726

You deserved it 7 679

By Anonymous - 18/12/2015 10:17 - United States

Today, I started my new job at a small business. I was pretty excited to finally be working, until I found out the big boss is a creeper and sees no problem making comments such as "You're way more interesting than the rest of these slope-eyed fucks." FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 855

You deserved it 1 670

By power corrupts... - 07/08/2011 20:29 - Czech Republic

Today, at my job as a movie theater attendant, my boss finally eased up and let me sit in on one of the movies. One woman kept laughing out loud every other line. After ten minutes of her braying like a dying horse, I got up and had her ejected from the theater. I'm a terrible person. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 055

You deserved it 12 044

By Anonymous - 17/08/2012 22:16 - Canada

Today, my lazy manager, who blatantly spreads vicious rumors about employees, one which has ruined a marriage, has started targeting me because her lazy daughter was legally fired. Now I'm known around the office as "the whore who slept her way up the corporate ladder." FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 783

You deserved it 1 849

Sticky situation

By Anonymous - 19/01/2021 05:02

Today, my boss keeps pointing out similarities between his wife and me. I genuinely dislike her, and have feelings for him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 380

You deserved it 1 039

By trustyourfamily - 14/09/2015 22:56 - United States - San Francisco

Today, my boss bragged to a coworker, in front of me, about how much money he saved on a project because he majorly underpays me. My boss is my dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 057

You deserved it 2 285

By Anonymous - 12/10/2013 06:19 - United States - Avon

Today, my bitchy co-worker decided that being given a compliment on her shoes is sexual harassment, and worthy of reporting me to our boss over. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 439

You deserved it 3 553

TheArchAngel 8

Tuesday 5 June 2012 8:56

He's no pimp without the slap.

TheElderTROLLZ 15

Tuesday 5 June 2012 8:56

Does he pimp slap you too?

Comments

alwaysbored13 14

Tuesday 5 June 2012 10:23

And that's how you know when somebody is a forever alone loser...

klorehore 24

Tuesday 5 June 2012 10:29

are you saying prostitutes aren't human beings?

Kitouran 30

Monday 4 April 2016 20:20

The point Your head

MrArmy 1

Tuesday 5 June 2012 10:42

He could get fired for that behavior.

NBL_fml 8

Tuesday 5 June 2012 10:43

Shouldn't there be someone to report him to about this?

marisadc79 0

Tuesday 5 June 2012 10:45

And that's what lawsuits are for I wouldn't put up with that a second longer myself

mrphychrs 5

Tuesday 5 June 2012 10:47

Whipping hoes ain't easy

bedbeawsome 3

Tuesday 5 June 2012 11:04

The office

darcimckeown 3

Tuesday 5 June 2012 11:34

What a mature man!

mdsummrsnght 17

Tuesday 5 June 2012 11:48

Sounds to me like a lawsuit for harassment....

elletex 8

Tuesday 5 June 2012 11:49

Is your boss Michael Scott by any chance?

Keywords

Management Work Awkward Miscellaneous Friends Health Relatable Healthy Lifestyle Mother in law Gifts Money Birthday Family Education Parents Public freakouts Pranks Students Exams Weird Love Argument AITA Fear Insects Skincare Cats Job interview Jealousy Gross

The Top

Today, I was on the bus home and on the phone with my best friend discussing my sex life with this new guy I'm seeing. I was telling her all sorts of raunchy sex things we've done until someone taps my shoulder and says "I'm sure he doesn't appreciate you saying this in public." It was his mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 355

You deserved it 107 046

Today, I had to call a customer. I usually try to avoid calling customers because I have a very prominent speech impediment. Well, it turns out the customer I called also has a speech impediment and thought I was mocking her. She hung up on me and filed a formal complaint with my company. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 805

You deserved it 624

The Top

Today, I finally got my wish of having snow on my birthday. Excited, I failed to realise this meant that no one could come to my party, including myself as we were all snowed out of town. What did I spend my 18th doing? Tidying our house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 029

You deserved it 3 933

Today, my girlfriend and I were being driven home from our date by her mother. She's Jewish and I'm Catholic. Her mother was talking about how my girlfriend was going on a trip to Jerusalem that summer. She finished with "And you can find a nice Jewish boy while you're there." FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 065

You deserved it 4 990

Today, my girlfriend of three days asked if we could start naming our future children. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 610

You deserved it 4 860

Today, my neighbour's puppy has developed separation anxiety. Every time my neighbour leaves for work, the puppy constantly whines and barks until he gets home. He works night shifts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 251

You deserved it 2 413

Today, a customer phoned, asking to collect an item. I explained that there was no need, as the item had already been posted out to her and was on its way. Her response? Apparently, I don’t deserve to have a set of balls, and I’m lucky or she’d emasculate me. She'd ordered a remote control. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 100

You deserved it 85

Today, I had my first day being my mum’s carer. She did the biggest shit I’ve ever seen, and when the toilet wouldn’t flush it, I had put a gloved hand down the loo and break it up with my fingers. Start things how you mean to go on, I guess. FML

I agree, your life sucks 849

You deserved it 84

Same thing different taste

Creep in chief

Make up your mind

Sticky situation

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