Miscellaneous: Today, I got confused and said grace before brushing my teeth.... - FML

By oops - 27/09/2015 02:24 - Australia - Cheltenham

Today, I got confused and said grace before brushing my teeth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 773

You deserved it 5 597

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 29/10/2013 18:57 - Zimbabwe

Today, I rushed to a dentist's appointment. Once in the chair, I apologized for not having had the time to brush my teeth beforehand. He responded with, "Ah that's alright, I just took a piss and forgot to wash my hands." FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 837

You deserved it 13 870

By Noname - 09/11/2008 09:18 - France

Today, whilst brushing my teeth, I fell asleep poking myself in the eye with my toothbrush. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 679

You deserved it 13 849

By captfml - 15/12/2010 22:32 - United States

Today, I was in the bathroom in a rush to get ready. Without thinking, I put hand soap on my toothbrush. I didn't notice until it was already in my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 307

You deserved it 27 703

By Simon Cowell - 08/09/2018 20:30

Today, I realised my teeth are so stained that they look cleaner when I've not brushed them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 250

You deserved it 866

By knighton16 - 17/07/2010 18:23 - United States

Today, I was brushing my teeth and shaving in the shower. My favorite song came on, and I got mixed up. My tongue and mouth are cut badly now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 139

You deserved it 58 637

Ouch

By Anonymous - 31/07/2020 02:03

Today, while brushing my teeth half asleep, I stabbed myself in the eye with my toothbrush, toothpaste included. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 103

You deserved it 543

Eww! Cleanliness!

By Anonymous - 22/11/2022 03:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I got looked at weirdly for brushing my teeth in an airport bathroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 763

You deserved it 456

Minty freshness

By Sergie - 04/06/2010 09:28 - Ireland

Today, I was getting ready for my first day at work. Right before leaving the house I brushed my teeth thoroughly one more time to have a fresh breath. While cleaning my tongue, I went too far, which made me throw up. I was 20 minutes late for work. Good start. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 198

You deserved it 28 363

Snap!

By fax4voice3 - 28/08/2023 18:02 - United States - Brooklyn

Today, I was flossing my teeth, which I do only to not get yelled at (chewed out?) by my dentist. Dentist I’ll now be seeing later today because the floss broke off a corner of one of my molars. FML

I agree, your life sucks 519

You deserved it 162

By Mirroronthewall - 30/08/2009 15:22 - Canada

Today, I was brushing my teeth in my bathroom. As I looked in the mirror I spotted a zit on my forehead. Keeping my toothbrush in my mouth, I quickly lean in towards the mirror to pop the pimple meanwhile lodging my toothbrush down my throat. I temporarily can't talk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 763

You deserved it 44 191

Next

Top comments

twitchywaffles 26

Sunday 27 September 2015 19:19

Jesus will make sure you never have a cavity again

Welshite 39

Sunday 27 September 2015 19:20

Dear God, Accept this sacrifice of oral agony as I dedicate my teeth to Your great glory. Please keep my pearly whites safe so that I might one day see Heaven's Pearly Gates. Amen.

Comments

9a_1z 12

Sunday 27 September 2015 20:28

Once when I was little I accidentally said my bedtime prayer instead of grace. Jesus hasn't spoken to me since :(

Luter72 9

Sunday 27 September 2015 21:07

i am sure that nobody saw you this thing isnt so bad and no one in this entire universe would've known about this if you haven't posted it on FML like a bitch

captainyoung 4

Sunday 27 September 2015 21:46

I'm catholic we have a prayer for everything

rachelrae120 11

Sunday 27 September 2015 23:48

I'm Catholic and I agree with that (:

soulreaper12296 28

Sunday 27 September 2015 21:58

Why is this an FML?

Jryan952015 7

Sunday 27 September 2015 21:59

Did you eat the toothpaste?

CrazyMelvin 14

Sunday 27 September 2015 22:20

Nothing wrong with praying any time.

Jets4Life89 4

Sunday 27 September 2015 22:33

Why the **** are you putting this on this site? This isn't some stupid ass twitter bullshit this is supposed to be embarrassing or **** me moments not you being so stupid you pray before teeth brushing, keep stupid shit like that to yourself noone cares.

sexytimemagee 3

Sunday 27 September 2015 22:34

there is no god. you just talked yourself before you brushed your teeth.

SS 31

Sunday 27 September 2015 22:42

A mate of mine once said grace during sex. To be fair though his girlfriend was called Grace

cowgirlupCA 4

Sunday 27 September 2015 22:48

It's never a bad time to talk to God

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The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 27 052

You deserved it 3 116

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The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 4 612

You deserved it 288

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I agree, your life sucks 1 230

You deserved it 139

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I agree, your life sucks 3 883

You deserved it 917

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I agree, your life sucks 50 172

You deserved it 8 224

Today, I have severe sun poisoning, a migraine, have been getting dehydrated no matter how much water I drink, and am on my period with horrible cramps. Yay summer! FML

I agree, your life sucks 784

You deserved it 150

Today, at my theatre group, I was supposed to stamp my foot in a tantrum then exit stage left. I stamped my foot at just the right height and power for it to go all the way up my leg and dislocate my hip. I’m only 36 and now I might have a bad hip for the rest of my life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 674

You deserved it 106