Intimacy: Today, I got a completely random boner at a coffee shop, five...

By Anonymous - 25/07/2011 17:11 - United States

Today, I got a completely random boner at a coffee shop, five seconds before two attractive women asked me to stand up and take their picture. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 555

You deserved it 5 773

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Not now, Cooper

By Me. - 27/10/2011 06:40 - United States

Today, I got a boner at the dentist's. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 996

You deserved it 8 860

By Anonycock - 06/01/2016 17:15 - Qatar - Doha

Today, I'm so sexually deprived, I got a boner from undressing a mannequin at work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 823

You deserved it 3 906

By bill219 - 07/12/2012 22:40 - United States - Dallas

Today, I was at the breakfast table when my sister started eating a banana. Before I knew what was happening, I'd somehow popped a boner. I had to wait for her to leave before I could stand up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 228

You deserved it 26 076

By Lin - 02/03/2010 05:57 - United States

Today, I was at a concert and an older man offered to let me stand in front of him because I'm short. It wasn't until the show started and people were jumping around did I realize he had a boner and was repeatedly bumping into me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 146

You deserved it 3 011

Quick as rainbows

By bonehead69 - 31/05/2015 07:06 - United States - Taylorville

Today, I'm so deprived of intimacy that I got a raging boner when a waitress called me "hun". FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 678

You deserved it 5 394

By Why - 29/01/2016 22:53

Today, I randomly got a boner while modeling a character's butt in animation class. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 648

You deserved it 3 617

By gracelynn980765 - 27/06/2019 12:30

Today, it was the third time in a row someone has lost a boner inside of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 539

You deserved it 618

By Thanks dicks - 07/09/2018 06:00

Today, I got naked in front of a girl for the first time. Too bad it happened when my "friends" pulled down my swimsuit at a party. Everyone saw my penis. I got a boner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 727

You deserved it 363

By Anonymous - 21/11/2011 22:39 - United States

Today, I popped a boner while my braces were being tightened. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 879

You deserved it 7 505

By nomorefreehugs - 27/06/2011 23:34 - United States

Today, I saw a guy with a "free hugs" poster. Since nobody else was hugging him, I decided to. He had a boner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 707

You deserved it 41 244

Xx6RoseThorn9xX 5

Monday 25 July 2011 22:52

your dingdong can see the future ;)

straz123 2

Monday 25 July 2011 22:52

Ohhhh. fyl bro.

Comments

JiggyBear 2

Tuesday 26 July 2011 0:08

Well at o q

JiggyBear 2

Tuesday 26 July 2011 0:10

Well at least they know you REALLY love photography.

zhightower 3

Tuesday 26 July 2011 0:12

no way you accepted.... sooooo, how was your coffee??

Missmeeep 2

Tuesday 26 July 2011 0:13

#22 some guys can't tuck and ouch dude sorry

dontstealmyshoes 0

Tuesday 26 July 2011 0:15

hahahhaa so good

SuperSukh 6

Tuesday 26 July 2011 0:15

"Random"

SuperSukh 6

Tuesday 26 July 2011 0:15

"Random"

bretty_boieeeeyy 0

Tuesday 26 July 2011 0:20

and you replied with " I'm sorry girls but I'm to busy pitching a tent to take your pictures"

iceclimbers1 0

Tuesday 26 July 2011 0:23

"Show us yo pics!" ya shoulda asked for a copy!

FruityLoooons 8

Tuesday 26 July 2011 0:25

Not so 'completely random' anymore, yeah? :)

Keywords

Video games Annoying Gamers Birthday Money Cute Kids Love Health Weird Awkward Relatable Abuse Social Media Scams Parents School Education Anger issues Teenagers Family Miscellaneous Relationship advice Capitalism Public freakouts Grieving Mental health Music Geek Poopoo peepee

The Top

Today, despite the fact that I'm happy and in love, my spiteful brat of a 12 year-old keeps spreading hateful and disgusting lies about my boyfriend doing unspeakable things while I'm away on business. Her dad told me he's reporting my boyfriend to the police. FML

I agree, your life sucks 162

You deserved it 605

Today, I found out that my toxic mother-in-law's retirement plans include moving in with us when she gets old. The death glares I’m getting from my wife right now are so worth the satisfaction I got from telling that evil old bat I’d burn the house down first before I let her move into it with us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 455

You deserved it 65

The Top

Today, I woke myself up by pinching my nipple between my elbow and the bed. This isn’t the first time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 322

You deserved it 62

Today, I was riding the subway home after a long shift at hospital. I accidentally made eye contact with a sketchy dude for a split second. He launched a wide spray of spit at me. At least I was wearing scrubs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 226

You deserved it 123

Today, I realized that every guy I get with or try a relationship with always ghosts me or friendzones me, and chooses to date someone else. It’s been a repetitive pattern for the past three years or so. I think I’m just going to adopt a bunch of pets and forget dating altogether. FML

I agree, your life sucks 652

You deserved it 210

Today, I, a 33 year-old guy, had to explain to my 27 year-old girlfriend that she does NOT pee out of her vaginal opening, but does in fact have a separate hole she pees from. She didn’t believe me. After showing her a diagram of the female anatomy online, she said, “Yeah well I don’t have one of those.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 043

You deserved it 127

Today, I went to sleep at 7am. I learned once that Indians used to drink tons of water before bed to force themselves awake so I did that in case my alarm (which I hooked up to my speakers) didn't work. The alarm worked, but the shock of the blasting sound made me pee my pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 125

You deserved it 3 124

Today, I went to a party to see my crush. He offered me a drink and I declined telling him that I don't drink because alcohol makes people act stupid and crash their cars. He then saw me back into a car parked on the street and shatter my backlights as I reversed from the driveway to go home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 281

You deserved it 73 355

Same thing different taste

Not now, Cooper

Quick as rainbows

Top comments

Comments