Work: Today, at work, I accidentally got ink on my white dress shirt...

By CMANIA - 07/09/2009 22:19 - United States

Today, at work, I accidentally got ink on my white dress shirt - right by my left nipple. Absentmindedly, I licked my finger and tried rubbing the stain out. When I looked up, the Vice President was staring at me in disbelief. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 024

You deserved it 6 625

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Same thing different taste

By Marie - 08/06/2009 18:51 - United States

Today, I had a meeting at work with my board of directors for a potential promotion. When one of them told a joke, I politely let out an amused snort. Then, I noticed my director's white shirt and tie covered in red splatter. I nose bled all over the director of my company. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 450

You deserved it 4 793

By fired101 - 08/02/2010 06:04 - France

Today, it was my first day of work at a very high end company. While delivering coffee to my boss, I set it down on the edge of a magazine, where it spilled over, into his crotch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 420

You deserved it 7 415

By Confused and Disgusted - 23/02/2015 23:42 - United States - Sparta

Today, while at work, a customer came up to me, stuck his finger in my armpit, then licked his finger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 286

You deserved it 2 424

Spunky

By grimatwork - 01/11/2010 17:24 - United Kingdom

Today, after taking my jacket off at work, I found a large faint stain all across one side of my shirt. Turns out that my fiancé had used it to "clean up the bed." I am the manager of a supermarket with 40 employees. It was pretty obvious what it was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 438

You deserved it 5 436

By Anonymous - 10/02/2011 20:06 - United States

Today, I was on the phone with a client, when the gum I was casually chewing fell out of my mouth and down my shirt. While I was trying to dig it out, two of our newest customers walked into the lobby to see what looked like me fondling my breasts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 359

You deserved it 12 707

Wiped out

By STIgary - 17/07/2021 16:01 - United States

Today, while at work, I had to poop. While wiping, I somehow managed to get the back tail of my shirt in between my butthole and the toilet paper, effectively wiping my ass with my white dress shirt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 997

You deserved it 285

Not what you think

By Anonymous - 28/05/2023 06:00

Today, I was running late to work so I started getting dressed and brushing my teeth. I got to work 5 minutes late, which is when noticed a toothpaste stain on my shirt. I thought it looked identical to a cum stain, and the worst part was I was wearing black, so it was noticeable. FML

I agree, your life sucks 630

You deserved it 228

You tried

By Anonymous - 22/01/2021 00:01 - Australia

Today, my colleague was wearing a beautiful dress. I decided that I had to go over and compliment her. As I walked over, my coffee cup flew out of my hand and onto said dress. She had to go home and change, and my boss had to cover for her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 963

You deserved it 414

By 911 - 13/11/2008 03:57 - France

Today, my boss sneezed onto his hands and then licked them in front of my best customers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 230

You deserved it 2 323

Whatcha been up to?

By Just another Dude - 02/10/2017 13:00

Today, I spilled vanilla yogurt on my pants while eating breakfast, but I forgot to clean it up. It left a very conspicuous white stain on my pants, that was there the entire day. I only noticed it when I looked in the mirror after getting home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 956

You deserved it 966

Intoxicunt 5

Tuesday 8 September 2009 9:26

That wasn't disbelief, it was amazement and arousal. (You mean "ink" not "pen".)

allmidnighteyes 10

Tuesday 8 September 2009 9:29

He only wishes he could've "accidentally" gotten "ink" on your nipple ;D

Comments

Glam_fml 0

Tuesday 8 September 2009 15:25

Ha! I love this FML. It sounds like something I would do.

Fett 0

Tuesday 8 September 2009 16:02

stop talking and keep rubbing.....

myhairynutsack 0

Tuesday 8 September 2009 17:04

I call fake.

BadLuckTuck 0

Tuesday 8 September 2009 17:37

Your life is ****** for embarrassing yourself in front of Joe Biden.

IambecomeRAWR 0

Tuesday 8 September 2009 19:09

Why, exactly? Someone has to work at Joe Biden's office, and the internet is a big place.

Witchcraft_fml 4

Tuesday 8 September 2009 18:04

Tomorrow, don't forget the handcuffs and whipped cream.

Eve66613 0

Tuesday 8 September 2009 18:55

hahaha did u get promoted?

tenkenshi 2

Tuesday 8 September 2009 19:13

sounds like the FML where a guy has an ipod in his shirt pocket and he's turning the sound down as he's approaching a hot girl and it looks like he's rubbing his nipple while looking at her.

canucksrule88 0

Tuesday 8 September 2009 19:44

LOL he must have been turned way the hell on

Macthenyfe 0

Tuesday 8 September 2009 19:46

That's rock*

fbirem 2

Tuesday 8 September 2009 19:49

This was in a commercial, only they used Jelly Doughnuts and it was just some fat coworker instead of his boss. Was never sure if the fat guy was interested in the nipple-rubbing coworker or the Doughnut personally.