Sucker

By BadIdea - 01/03/2012 21:23 - France

Spicy
Today, I decided to shave my balls. When I was finished, I vacuumed up the mess on the carpet, and then the fragments of hair still on my balls. Very bad idea. FML
I agree, your life sucks 10 283
You deserved it 59 640

Same thing different taste

Top comments

Lol. Why would you put a vaccum even CLOSE to your balls?

Comments

unitedfan11 0

What a peculiar way to get a vasectomy...

drsovereign 2

I'm dumbfounded as to why you would do that, just brush the stray hair of with your hand. That's like saying I trimmed my hedges with a chainsaw and then I thought I might trim my pubes with the chainsaw too.

skata 4

this is probably the stupidest idea I've heard of on this site and that's saying a lot. actually, this is the stupidest idea I've heard of anywhere

You trimmed your pubes over the carpet?

lol I was going to say the exact same thing 58 but you beat me to it. I can't fathom how someone would even think to do that. I hope his testicles got sucked up in there so he can't reproduce.

56, I don't think your comparison is very similar to the FML...

#52 Done right, it could be the best feeling ever haha

How terrible! Now you can't pass down that high I.Q. of yours down to your would-be children :(

danv79_fml 0

this FmL was just too hilarious. why would you shave over a carpet? i wonder if he panicked and forgot how to turn the vacuum off. lmao That wouldve been priceless!

Guys! I don't know how many time I need to say this, just trim the bushes. You don't have to take a razor to your junk.

56 when you shave your hands won't get the hair off the best way to do it is a towel wet usually works the best....

SneezyC 15

I see what you did there .... Clever.

Lol. Why would you put a vaccum even CLOSE to your balls?

He was cleaning his room, at the least that's the reason Dewey from Scary Movie used for getting the vacuum to suck his balls.

Why is he shaving his balls over carpet, isn't that like something you should do in the shower?

thiscrazything 1

Never done it, but holy f- I felt that.

maybe he missed the meaning of dyson ball cleaner

Stiggy626 25

I see all these people saying free *******, but it doesn't involve the penis and has enough force to suck your ball into the tube

JustDerpin 11
FlamingTacos 7

The word sex hasn't been mentioned at all in the fml, the comment, or in any other nearby comment nor has there been a sexual reference made so please explain your comment to me.

Why don't u plz explain the tiny dick hanging from ur sacs, nazi

apparently that the Hoover, would suck in the remaining pubic hair that was trimmed without... well, you get my drift.

sharod101 5

Makes me wonder what goes through their minds before they do that stuff.

Sucks for the vacuum, we as humans need to make the ethical choice and seek a vacuum's consent before raping it.

I've never personally had my sack sucked by a vacuum. But I have done stuff where I realized after, moron. Haven't we all?!

kiran_fml 5

You are so incredibly stupid, but I laughed at you anyways.

loller27 6
GoW_Chick 14

You know showers work at cleaning you off even better, but to each his own.

Vacuum cleaners and genitals...a great combination.

It's "show me your genitals," not "vacuum your genitals." Silly OP.

IAdminIFlow 0

gow chick fyi showers dont shave balls

177- you are literally too dumb to insult.

177- You are literally ******* stupid, and because you are too stupid to use protection the babies you will have with stupid will be so astronomically stupid that even your stupidly stupid stupidity will look genius. Thank you and good day.

monnanon 13

^^ Blackadder? Is that you?

isis_morrigan 18

177- Pretty sure she's aware of this, I believe she was referring to using the shower after shaving to remove the loose hairs stuck as opposed to using the vacuum.

The_Troller 14

That sucks... Balls. I had to say it.

The_Troller 14

Lucky bastard. I've never even been to a concert.

Actually, you didn't have to say it sucks balls. But It was very funny () () [• •] V ( it's a bunny)

I didn't like them too much live. I saw them in the kroq weenie roast back in 2007

jeob1992 8

Since we are on the subject... Favorite song by them?... Mine is savior

jacquay09 3

Forgotten sons! Awesome song by Rise Against

24- I'm very sorry. Concerts are like the best things in the world. My last concert was actually in norfolk, va on 1/24/12, it was a day to remember and rise against. rise against played 20 ******* songs, and I currently have a water bottle drank by Tim McIlrath chillin in my room. ****** awesome day.

2ndSucks 15

I saw them with ADTR too! Two of my favorite bands performing and I got to watch Rise Against from the stage. Amazing experience if you can get your hands on all access passes.

So I found this band called Nickelback...

MoonPhase123 4

I love Rise Against, especially Savior since it's the song that got me to love them in the first place.

121- That's ****** awesome dude, they both put on a hell of a show haha I've never been on a stage while a bands performing but I've met a few people, like brandon saller and all of five finger death punch. but I didn't really know adtr well before I saw them live, but after I saw them I got all their music and love if

Ok, I got surprised when I noticed that all of the comments have to do with music. Nice derail. Oh yea, btw, C-C-C-COMBO BREAKER! Had to.

Prayer of the refugee was the first song I heard by them years ago before they were known. :p I would have to say savior is probably my favorite too.

Why would you not shave your balls on tiles? Like maybe in the bathroom?

I can't imagine a vacuum picking up every hair, so gross.

Last time I checked he said carpet..

Yeah, but last time I checked hair gets caught a lot more in carpet than tiles. If he did it on tiles he could just sweep it up. Or even better, do it in the shower so it just washes down the drain. Why do you think kitchens have tiles? Because they're a lot easier to clean. You could have carpet in the kitchen but it's impractical. EDIT: mctime changed his comment, now I look like a fool

Lol sorry guys. I realized it the second I did it. I should probably just delete my account now.

Thats a good idea. Smartest I've heard all day.

Ha! Wait till you get 3 day growth!!! Get the calamine lotion ready. You're going to itch like a mofo! ( so I've heard) Wax/laser it off next time.

Pyro_Wolf 17

Waxing or lasering pubic hairs sounds painful....

You should YouTube male Brazilian wax. It's Hilarious!

Lmao that shit does ******* itch like a bitch, plus it will also be like needles on your balls too for like 2 weeks

You can't seriously suggest op wax their balls. That's probably worse than the vacuum.