Heavy

By Anonymous - 10/10/2011 08:29 - Reserved

Today, I walked in on my flatmate squatting over the bathroom scales, completely naked. When I asked what he was doing, he replied very seriously, "Weighing my testicles… you should try it sometime, if they're too heavy you may have cancer." I'm a girl. FML
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You deserved it 3 006
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Top comments

Outsider_77 0

Anyone who weighs his testicles should not be taken seriously.

175 7

Comments

lajaynay 15

So... What is the normal weight..? And what weight would be considered cancerous..? "To the google machine!"

44 4
sasha_kay 4

Well that can't be right haha...8 pound balls :/

11 1
thisisafunnyname 12

Yeah, that can't be right. It should probably be something more like 10 pound balls

11 2
False_Stupidity 41

#62 & #85 If either/both of you gents have 10+ pound testicles I would recommend hospital ASAP.. Your balls would be dragging on the ground and that would chafe...

9 1
MissBunnyWillEat 11

If I were a boy, my dick would be so big I could wear around my neck like a boa.

5 15
tittymagic 0

Is 3-4 tons normal for each?? Or is that cancerous?

0 2
docscientist 9

I strap a gun holster to my inner thigh and holster mine so it doesn't swing around like a pendulum.

7 1
P374RD3D 9

131 what if you trip over it like a shoelace

2 1
BWill9014 4

Sounds like he's referring to Elephantitis... But that's just my guess

6 7
skyeyez9 24

He should weigh them on one of those mini food scales

7 6
False_Stupidity 41

And then NEVER use said scales for food ever again... O.o

5 0
perdix 29

In that case, if your testicles weigh more than 0.00 grams, you've got problems. Not cancer, but problems, nevertheless.

26 8
False_Stupidity 41

#46 No, as in the OP is female, therefore balls of any weight indicates a problem.

2 1
WaSiSimiLang 8

Well... Are Breasts are counted as balls? Since they are round...

1 3
perdix 29

Sorry, you are just making it worse.

2 2
Epikouros 31

This is one of those FML's that call for a WTF button.

28 3
nephilim241 19

OP's flatmate found a novel excuse to be caught weighing/showing off his manhood

9 4
SunriseSurprize 2

How much do your testes weigh?

1 11
Epikouros 31

Tell him this is not a reliable method to weigh your testicles - he should chop them off and weigh them on a kitchen scale.

23 4
loserman67 35

I guarantee you caught him weighing his balls after a jack-off session. He weighed them before and then he weighed them after so he could try and caculate the amount of **** he shot. And no, I have never done this. You missed a golden opportunity, "You'll need a smaller scale, that one weighs in pounds, you need one that weighs in grams."

20 1
icadragoon 11

Why not just weigh the ****? It's less work.

8 1
Ray_of_midnight 22

Or just measure volume and estimate density as equal to that of water at 1ml=1g. probably close enough. Most of a man's ejaculate volume is prostatic fluid anyway and doesn't originate in the testicles or scrotum.

5 1
j_cat187 19

Interesting dose anyone know the density of semen?

0 2