Freak in the streets…

By grocerystalker - 16/11/2012 05:58 - Australia - Newcastle

Today, I spotted a girl I have a crush on while grocery shopping. Before I could go over and say hi, I noticed her walk over and stroke a few kitchen knives through plastic wrapping. Then I spotted her in the dog food section sniffing rawhide bones with her eyes closed, looking very happy. FML
I agree, your life sucks 26 516
You deserved it 3 422

Same thing different taste

Top comments

xXHollowIchigoXx 17

Just a little grocery shopping, nothing to get all worked out about. I love the smell of cardboard and new books, I'll give em a whiff or two while I shop. Nothing wrong with that.

Comments

She knew you were watching... Take a hint from the knives and dog food... She's never going to be into you. On the bright side, she doesn't want to hurt your feelings either.

You're assuming she knew he had a crush on her.

Or... she just noticed a man following her around a store without saying anything and decided to act on it? Having a "crush" does nothing for this story except try to justify the OP's actions. Which, in my opinion anyway, it does not.

Wow, I've never heard a stalker complain about their POI before. Guess there's a first time for everything. Just add "Bone and knife fetish" to your list of things to talk about when you approach her. "Hey, I heard you like long, stiff bones." ;) ....On second thought, just stick to the stalking.

Holy shit, Australia has a whole island dedicated to dog food? Or do you possibly mean "aisle" rather than "isle"? And now would be the time for the mods to edit the FML and make me look like an idiot. Go ahead, damn you. I can take it.

perdix 29

Noooo, don't you know that Tasmania is where all the two headed people live??? I came to Tassie to observe their lifestyle.

I'm Tasmanian, I can tell you that it is an absolute shit hole, I don't live there anymore, thank god

Oh ho, you sneaky bastards! You changed "dog food isle" to "dog food section" to make me look extra stupid! Well played, mods. Well played indeed.

That's awesome, but doc got in first and clarified to all this mistake, he's still safe

OR, she is having a bittersweet memory of her late dog, brought about by the smell of its favourite bone. It unfortunately was offed by her best friend who was also downed in a freak accident while showing off how many ceramic knives he could juggle with a blind-fold on while riding a unicycle. Just puttting my hypothesis out there.

guci101 14

Kinky! U should hit that (hoping for either a million thumbs up or down xD)

Really? I'm going to put a hundred down for over 50 thumbs down in the next hour. Anyone else want to place bets? Oh, allow me to contribute to my odds. *thumbs down*

It would appear that you lost, ill be waiting by my mailbox for that 100.

cutiepie292929 18

Some Smells bring back memories for people. Maybe that bone reminds her of a dog she once had. Stroking knives...sometimes I just touch things when I'm so bored and daydreaming. So maybe she was the same thinking if to buy it or not

perdix 29

A girl taking pleasure sniffing bones? Get out of my way! If you're not going to say hi to her, I will. Imma say, "Hi, I see you like sniffing bones. . ." and que sera freakin' sera.

RedPillSucks 31

You missed the "stroking knives" part. She may be the reincarnation of Lorena Bobbit. Ouch!

perdix 29

Lorena Bobbitt is still alive and well and cutting men down to size.

I should take note, if my stalker ever sees me in the grocery store I'll be sure and do just that.

She's a keeper. Of body parts in sandwich bags, probably.