Love: Foreshadowing - FML

Foreshadowing

By JB. - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States - Somerset

Today, while my husband and I were arguing, he walked away in the middle of my sentence yelling, "Remember babe, you're only my current wife!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 970

You deserved it 5 070

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Same thing different taste

By Myriam - 18/06/2012 16:05 - Maldives - Male

Today, my husband recorded me getting out of bed and sleepwalking all the way into the backyard and straight into our pool. He was too busy giggling like a schoolgirl to help me out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 852

You deserved it 3 407

By allocomrade - 29/07/2009 20:23 - United States

Today, my wife told me she wanted a divorce. She also confessed that she has been cheating on me with my best friend for 10 years. I appreciated the honesty, but was slightly upset considering we have only been married for 9 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 686

You deserved it 3 246

Lower your expectations

By AchievementUnlocked? - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my husband and I were talking about celebrities he finds attractive. All of these beautiful, talented, glamorous women were starting to make me feel very plain, so he attempted to console me by saying, "But I love you. You're attainable!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 732

You deserved it 6 637

Scary!

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United Kingdom

Today, my boyfriend dumped me, all because he's scared of my mother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 207

You deserved it 5 870

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By Sober - 25/04/2023 03:00

Today, my wife, who has a drinking problem, looked me straight in the eye as she poured herself a "water" bottle to enjoy while at work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 844

You deserved it 113

Stuck

By canessadawn - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States - Portland

Today, I was at my boyfriend's house waiting to surprise him when he got home from work. I was laying in his bed when he called to tell me we were over. I couldn't leave before he got home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 787

You deserved it 2 573

So creepy

By anonymous - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my crazy ex-girlfriend legally changed her last name to mine. I'm getting married in a week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 432

You deserved it 3 861

Sketchy

By Wolf - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - Trinidad and Tobago

Today, while sitting next to me, my boyfriend sent a text to one of his "friends" saying, "I'm thinking of you." FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 856

You deserved it 2 461

Deal or no deal?

By toughlove - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my boyfriend of 2 years told me he had feelings for someone else. He also told me he wanted to continue dating me until things progressed further with the other woman. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 573

You deserved it 2 688

You snooze, you lose

By propose_you_freakin_coward - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - Singapore - Singapore

Today, I was insulted and harassed by my sister and her boyfriend, all because I proposed yesterday. They were angry I might get married before they did. They have known each other since primary school; I met my fiancée earlier this year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 910

You deserved it 6 838

Next

Top comments

Egao_fml 8

Sunday 9 September 2012 15:55

What the?

greenie213 23

Sunday 9 September 2012 15:58

Past wives, future wives, midwives, good wives, bad wives, big wives, tall wives, fat wives, skinny wives. The list goes on and on!

Comments

onorexveritas 23

Sunday 9 September 2012 17:21

only? ... wow. he speaks so highly of you

jerry2011 4

Sunday 9 September 2012 17:22

Not sure about you OP. But some people need such reminders.

MandieL 27

Sunday 9 September 2012 17:23

I have to bite my tongue when my husband and I fight because all sorts is stupid irrational ride comments pop into my head. Sometimes they slip out but it depends on what the fight is and how mad I am. My husband employs the silent treatment and has once told me why. He Sais bad stuff too and would just rather not. It was a fight and I'm sure by the time your FML was posted, the fight was already done and over with and the comment forgotten about. Not an FML nor a YDI...kinda moot.

truckdriver321 3

Sunday 9 September 2012 17:31

Duh!! Man always has upper hand.

sweetly1120 6

Sunday 9 September 2012 17:33

Be like "remember hun, you're only my current husband!"

Rabidkid 14

Sunday 9 September 2012 17:52

Lol

olpally 32

Sunday 9 September 2012 17:54

Another FML with another asshat guy... Jeez :/

Hon3y_schnucums 1

Sunday 9 September 2012 18:11

You should have came back at him with "Well maybe your next wife will be Asian. Every dick is big to them." lol

saphfiire 13

Sunday 9 September 2012 18:13

I definitely said that a few times during my marriage. And during my engagement too. I tried to call the wedding off, and I walked away 2 months later. My XH was most definitely replaceable.

DocBastard 38

Sunday 9 September 2012 19:17

Gee, I'm glad to see you take the concept of marriage so seriously.

Rocky007 15

Sunday 9 September 2012 18:22

I always introduce my wife as "This is Mrs. Rocky007, my first wife".

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The Top

Today, after receiving the third call this week from teachers about my son falling asleep in class, I decided that it would be a good idea to hide his Xbox controllers. He decided it would be a good idea to hide my diabetes medication. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 638

You deserved it 19 265

Today, I found a wallet on the train. I called the owner, who said he would come around and pick it up. When he finally did, he looked inside and screamed that his money was missing, and that I was a dirty thief. I never took a cent. He's filing theft charges against me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 70 429

You deserved it 4 436

The Top

Today, I got hit by a car while riding my bike to work. In the hospital, every single nurse lectured me about how I wouldn't be here if I wore a helmet, which I'm sure would be really helpful to my broken leg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 653

You deserved it 5 294

Today, I was driving when this guy aggressively rode my tail and crossed over the yellow line to pass. He reached the stop light before I did, and I slowly pulled beside him and started clapping for this lunatic driver. He rolled down the window and said, "My daughter is in the hospital. How do I get there?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 388

You deserved it 1 065

Today, I hosted an open house. I forgot about it and arrived as they were leaving. There were dirty dishes and laundry everywhere, and my dildo was on my dresser. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 484

You deserved it 13 256

Today, I gave my boss a two-month notice. He threatened me by saying he wouldn't provide a reference if I quit in July instead of August. I need the reference to pursue my dream to work in the USA as a nanny. I have no other choice, I either work under their pressure or start all over. FML.

I agree, your life sucks 1 652

You deserved it 137

Today, after my first day at work at a local daycare, I found out that I'm not entitled to breaks because I'm the only worker there who doesn't smoke. My boss asked me, ''What do you need a break for?'' FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 972

You deserved it 2 981

Today, I weigh the same as I did the day I gave birth six months ago. I'd been working out and finally making progress, until I fell off a horse and injured my hip. I can't work out for at least the next two weeks either. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 116

You deserved it 184