Transportation: Close shave - FML

Close shave

By eyeamcool - 17/04/2009 04:11 - United States

Today, the police posted a description of the car of a child abductor. As everyone slowed down to read the billboard, I realized that the car's description and license plate were very similar to mine. After getting death stares from passengers, I got pulled over. Twice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 552

You deserved it 2 708

Father's Day: Daddy Chicken or Daddy Wet Hen?
Stories of extraordinary fathers, sometimes awkward but always hilarious. A family read! More…

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Same thing different taste

By Amara1717 - 19/08/2009 04:22 - United States

Today, I was driving my little sister to school. She really didn't wanna go and was throwing a tantrum in the car. When we stopped at a red light, my sister notices a police man giving a ticket to another driver. She rolled down her window and screamed "Help me! I'm being kidnapped by a murderer!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 72 110

You deserved it 3 505

By anoymus - 31/05/2009 02:37 - United States

Today, I was driving to the local market with my son. We approached a vehicle that looked just like my fiancé's. My son peered out his window and said, "Mommy, daddy's getting kidnapped!" It seems he was being 'kidnapped' by his new girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 944

You deserved it 3 272

By Anonymous - 03/11/2009 04:33 - Canada

Today, the police came to my door and told me about a woman who called the cops on me because she said that I had been following her in my car. We were on the highway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 115

You deserved it 2 023

By Anonymous - 19/09/2009 01:32 - United States

Today, I was driving through a neighborhood and saw a "slow down, children" sign. I was nice and slowed down as I passed a couple little kids with their parents outside watching them. I guess I was going too slow because one of the fathers started chasing me down the street calling me a pedophile. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 387

You deserved it 4 382

By PulledOver - 01/06/2009 05:10 - United States

Today, I pulled up to the stoplight near my house. It was dark with no traffic and the car behind me kept edging closer and closer to me. I finally got fed up with waiting and the car and ran it. In fact, it was a cop and he was trying to read my license plate because the back light was out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 971

You deserved it 54 811

Busted

By bustedfornuthin - 08/09/2010 04:42 - United States

Today, I was arrested by the police for sitting in what they thought was a stolen vehicle. After being slammed into the back of a squad car at gunpoint, they realized the car was actually recovered a week ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 895

You deserved it 2 496

By Anonymous - 12/09/2012 07:00 - United States - Valencia

Today, I was pulled over. The cop stated that he "couldn't see" me because I had "blended in with the dark car background", and that it looked like no one was driving. I was literally pulled over for being black. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 567

You deserved it 4 554

By TheIrony - 19/07/2016 21:50 - United States

Today, while driving I saw a police car riding along next to me. Thinking about the news recently, I decided to give him a quick thumbs up and a smile to lighten up his day. He looks back, smiles, flips on his siren, and pulls me over for not paying attention to the road. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 169

You deserved it 3 536

By pampa31 - 14/12/2015 17:21 - Mexico - Tijuana

Today, while I was driving, there was a high speed car chase. The runaway managed to avoid my car but the police didn't. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 764

You deserved it 1 697

By ashleighsheba - 27/09/2016 16:43 - United States - La Vergne

Today, I got pulled over, not because I was speeding but because apparently, I looked like a kid driving. The officer said I was too short to drive and needed a booster seat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 214

You deserved it 1 160

Next

Top comments

AWESOM_E 0

Friday 17 April 2009 12:06

Passengers? What passengers? Oh, you mean the children you were abducting...

mudkipsan 19

Friday 17 April 2009 13:18

One day, #8 will learn when to end a joke, and #9 will learn how to spot one.

Comments

Spl4sh_fml 0

Wednesday 3 June 2009 3:34

I lol'd

Raddaya 3

Thursday 3 February 2011 9:42

Get a paintjob.

X_o_X_ocutie 0

Wednesday 6 April 2011 3:52

what a coincidink

Gamer_Bum 1

Sunday 17 April 2011 23:38

YDI for abducting children

DeadxManxWalking 27

Sunday 5 June 2011 14:41

Ice Cube?

cameronman9 2

Thursday 7 June 2012 8:40

What did you learn?

tigerlover39 9

Wednesday 6 March 2013 22:47

Aawww poor you

evan_7899 28

Wednesday 23 October 2013 22:29

Ha, i assume you have a white van w/o windows

fantasyworld 37

Monday 5 May 2014 20:59

You need a paint job.

ODST_Panda 12

Sunday 3 August 2014 23:27

That's what happens when you drive around in a whitewashed van filled with mondo, 99 Bananas and gorilla tape.

Keywords

Weird Miscellaneous Awkward Shopping My ex Relatable Racism Family Kids AITA Love Cheating Work Break-ups Cute Cats Animals Sex Intimacy Relationship advice Alcohol Coworkers Psychology Mental health Health Neighbours Cops Stressed out Parents Scary

The Top

Today, I had a long talk with my now ex-boyfriend. I explained why I'm not comfortable with him bringing up his new female coworker multiple times a day, talking with her about their kinks and fetishes, or possibly being around her outside of work. We've been together for nine years. He's only known her for a week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 490

You deserved it 93

Today, after just two days of asking me to officially be his girlfriend, my boyfriend started following his ex-fiancé. When confronted, he admitted to chatting with her for over two hours about an important family matter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 363

You deserved it 124

The Top

Today, I was cutting some paper when I accidentally cut a sizeable chunk out of my finger. I went to my car to get my bumbag (I'm a lifeguard) so I could patch it up. I then promptly got a large piece of glass in my foot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 789

You deserved it 812

Today, I was riding on the Moscow metro. My friend and I were joking around in English about taking a nap on the nerdy business man next to me. As we laughed and made comments about him, which we thought he couldn't understand, he asked, "First time in Moscow?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 290

You deserved it 84 937

Today, I'm going to be the one dropping off two of my friends so they can go hang out. I'm not invited. FML

I agree, your life sucks 683

You deserved it 222

Today, I finally had sex with a coworker I’d been flirting with for nearly 2 and half years. The sex lasted less than 2 and a half minutes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 582

You deserved it 717

Today, my escape artist of a dog got out. She not only chased someone else's cat into someone else's house, but promptly defecated all over their living room floor out of excitement. That's one way to meet the new neighbors. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 181

You deserved it 5 064

Today, I was kicked out of class for having a coughing fit. Yesterday, I was kicked out of class for sleeping, a side effect of my cough suppressant. Three absents from this class and I automatically fail. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 144

You deserved it 3 826