Miscellaneous: Chill out, mom - FML

Chill out, mom

By chasingcars0624 - 28/08/2009 23:44 - United States

Today, I got a knock on my door at 3 a.m. Turns out, if I ignore my mother long enough, she will assume I have died and will call the cops. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 953

You deserved it 13 181

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 22/12/2010 22:23 - United States

Today, my mother took a bunch of sleeping pills, then went driving. I followed her and dialed 911. Now she thinks that I was "trying to get her arrested," and she refuses to talk to me ever again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 145

You deserved it 4 853

Not now, Doris

By Anonymous - 02/04/2024 13:00 - United States

Today, my mom is in the hospital and I'm sitting by the phone in case anyone calls with news. Each time the phone rings, I bolt upright to answer it. So far I've been woken up by two telemarketers, three robo-calls, and some old lady asking for Doris, who doesn't live here. I can't turn my phone off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 450

You deserved it 66

It's just me

By Anonymous - 20/02/2020 01:00

Today, I stopped by my elderly mother’s house to drop off some groceries. I decided to clean the place while I was there, just to be nice. In true Three Bears fashion, I fell asleep on the couch. I was awoken by a police officer pointing his gun at me. My mom woke up and thought I was a burglar. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 126

You deserved it 323

By Sarah - 26/01/2013 05:14 - United States

Today, my mom barged into my room at three in the morning, demanding to know where I'd been. I'd been in my room sleeping since ten o'clock. In that time she had called the police, all of my friends, and my ex-boyfriend, asking if I was with them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 277

You deserved it 2 476

By annoyed - 20/02/2013 20:33 - United States - Paradise Valley

Today, I was so exhausted that I slept through my phone ringing, and later my doorbell ringing. My psycho mom freaked out, and thinking I was in trouble, broke a window to get inside. This all happened before 7 a.m. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 185

You deserved it 2 761

By ipayyourbillsgorramit - 24/08/2012 23:29 - Australia - Queanbeyan

Today, after getting home from a twelve-hour shift at work, I got into bed and passed out. My mother soon woke me up, screaming that she could tell I was "fake sleeping" and ignoring her lecture on how I need to stop being so "lazy". FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 437

You deserved it 1 907

By lonely - 05/02/2009 15:14 - United States

Today, my phone rang for the first time in four days. It was my mom. She dialed the wrong number. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 601

You deserved it 3 262

By No-Sleep Nellie - 07/07/2015 13:26 - United States - Waterloo

Today, my mother woke me up by loudly vacuuming the house. I had to work the next morning, so I asked her what she was thinking. She told me that if I was really tired and needed sleep, I wouldn't have woken up. It was 3 AM. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 921

You deserved it 1 719

By Tired - 05/08/2010 18:38 - United States

Today, I got home from work to find the door locked and dead bolted, so I used my cell to call the home phone while banging on the door. My stepmom came out of her room, looked right at me, laughed, and went back to bed. This is the fifth time she's done this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 646

You deserved it 3 763

By maf811 - 07/11/2011 12:13 - United States

Today, my mother panicked and was about to report me missing when I didn't answer her calls while I was at a movie. I'm 31, and have lived on my own for over 10 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 008

You deserved it 2 789

Next

Top comments

redbluegreen 40

Saturday 29 August 2009 9:13

When did she call the cops? Why would they show up at 3am? I mean, if you were really dead, you'd still be dead, at lets say... Nine. In the afternoon. (;

Ashleyxphobia 0

Saturday 29 August 2009 9:07

At least she cares.

Comments

Mister_Kitty 0

Monday 31 August 2009 7:31

That's what you get for breast feeding until the age of 17.

I_iz_epic 0

Monday 31 August 2009 21:11

"she will assume I have died and call the cops" LMAO!! Funny how that's the only thing she thinks of.

lukeecharms90 0

Monday 31 August 2009 23:48

sounds like boyfriends crazy russian mom, all i have to say, make her stop before it puts stress on a relationship

Miss_Makay 0

Tuesday 1 September 2009 4:35

at least she cares because some people who dont have a mom who would call. let along call the cops to make sure their child is ohkay, i mean u cant blame her shes the one who brought you into this world. its bettter that shes over protecting then not caring at all.

Violet_Grace 0

Friday 4 September 2009 23:09

Since I moved away, my mother has done that same thing twice.

jeniilouise 0

Saturday 24 October 2009 2:15

why didn't the OP's mum just go to his/her house and check for herself?!

Hurt16 0

Monday 16 November 2009 10:34

your mom is sooo funny my mom can't wait to get me up n out to college lol

haribo158 0

Saturday 20 March 2010 22:50

feel your pain mate- we love em bt stop calling the cops!

kitxxkat1408 0

Tuesday 27 July 2010 6:55

9 months for nothing... way to go

NekoHakase 0

Saturday 13 November 2010 7:24

Ugh, cut the cord already, Woman. I can't stand over-protective mothers.

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The Top

Today, I had to call social services after a couple once again brought their baby in with severe allergic reactions. His allergy? The family dog. These idiots would rather let their kid die than get rid of the stupid mutt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 473

You deserved it 120

Today, my parents used to tell that me life gets way better after high school. Yeah, for everyone else at my school. They’re partying it up in college or travelling during gap years, meeting all sorts of people. I have to work more than full time because my parents kicked me out the week after I graduated. FML

I agree, your life sucks 462

You deserved it 95

The Top

Today, we drove six hours to get to our holiday cottage only to realise that my girlfriend had forgotten her suitcase. This put her in a bad mood, so she made ME drive six hours back to her flat to get it, then when I got there, I realised HER keys to HER FLAT were still in HER handbag six hours back at the cottage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 575

You deserved it 278

Today, it only took my dad 10 minutes after I'd arrived at my parents' house for him to say that the actor scheduled to be the new Doctor Who couldn't be Doctor Who because "He's black!" I did try pointing out that Doctor Who is an alien with two hearts but… I gave up after that. Merry Christmas, yeah. FML

I agree, your life sucks 514

You deserved it 180

Today, as I was walking my dog, some self-righteous animal activist berated me on how it was animal abuse to put my dog on a leash. Despite warning her, she crouched down to undo it, my dog charged at her, giving her a gash on the cheek. She kicked my dog for it, and is now threatening to sue me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 666

You deserved it 81

Today, I was bitched out by a pizza delivery man. I didn't have the cash to pay him for a pizza I didn't even order. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 383

You deserved it 2 608

Today, I have exactly 204 snowflakes saved onto my computer, all of which I made on this snowflake-making website. This is what my life has come to. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 925

You deserved it 9 683

Today, I found out why you never leave wet leather shoes in a van when it's over 90 degrees. FML

I agree, your life sucks 749

You deserved it 1 235