Miss Melbourne , Australia
Today, my daughter told me that she wanted to live with her father because they have a faster internet connection. FML
Today, I woke up at 5 am to the voices of my husband, who I gave my blessing to go out last night, and his buddies entering our apartment. They came here because the buddy who had planned to house them had no beer. They are drunk, drinking on our porch, shaving my husband's head. FML
Today, my dad got drunk and played a practical joke on me; a practical joke that resulted in my knee being broken. Now, I'm sitting in a hospital bed all alone while my dad hunts for "hot nurses". FML
Today, while walking around my college campus, I passed by a dorm where a drunk guy was peeing out one of the top floor windows while his drunk friends cheered him on. That guy is my boyfriend. Lucky me. FML
Today, I was brutally dumped over webcam, by my boyfriend, who was taking a dump with the laptop on his lap. FML
Today, when I went to pay for my groceries, I accidentally handed the cashier a condom instead of my $20. FML
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