Today, my boyfriend thought it'd be cute to put his penis through a doughnut and try to make me eat it off. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, while my boyfriend and I were having sex, he stopped, got off, walked into the kitchen grabbed a doughnut, and came back to finish while he ate it. FML
Today, I finally had sex with this great guy I've been seeing. I thought I'd found a catch. We get into his room, start kissing, and things heat up. Everything is perfect until he reaches under his bed, pulls out a doughnut and shoves it into my mouth, snarling, "Eat it, eat it!" FML
Today, my boyfriend bought my favorite doughnuts for our anniversary. After settling down and pouring a glass of wine, I grabbed a doughnut and quickly realized the filling inside wasn't jelly. He thought it would be funny to replace it with toothpaste. FML
Today, my boyfriend stopped in the middle of sex to ask if I wanted to get donuts. FML
Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, I remembered I had a Reese's Krispy Kreme doughnut in the car. I orgasmed while thinking about a doughnut. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were playing around, tickling each other. He grabbed my stomach roll and told me it looked like a baguette. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me about this guy who makes balloon animals with his penis. My boyfriend has spent the last 4 hours trying to make his penis look like a pretzel. FML
Today, my boyfriend tried to make me wear a fake mustache during sex. He said it "turns him on." FML
Today, my boyfriend said he wanted to try something new. By something new, it was to put flour in my butt and see what would happen if I farted. FML
Today, I was giving my boyfriend head. As I was beginning to enjoy and really get into it, I heard him say, "Oh my god, this is good shit." I looked up sexily, only to find that he was eating a Twinkie. FML
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Top comments
empbob 20
I'm sorry, it sucks that your boyfriends penis is small enough to fit thru a donut...
evanobrien 14
What kind of donut?????
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Comments (228)
inolongercare 19
I think that is okay- just go with it. Sex and food at the same time? Best combo (and yes I am a girl)
Omniprism 15
Hey at least he's trying to sweeten the deal.
poisongirl708 11
Yeah that's totally not awkward at all.... >_
sweetestbitcheva 14
Way to ruin a doughnut.
junkman6 22
Ewwww it's a penis!! That's pretty much as far as 90% of the respondents to this FML thought before posting. If it had been chocolate covered **** everyone would be loving it. Oh well.
squarecircles 13
I would've told him to eat it himself.
mzharlot22 8
Yum!!
katieemerr 15
YLS because your boyfriend can fit his penis through a doughnut hole.
jdlanam87 9
Thanks this was my thought. Don't feel so bad now Bahahaha
supersitter 11
Hey. You got a donut. Most of us just have to deal with the penis.
bsmith2012 6
id have made him close his eyes...take it off him and ran like hell lol