Today, I woke up after a night of drinking in my backyard. All I was wearing were my boxers and one sock. I staggered up to see my car halfway through my garage wall, with a note saying, "Sorry dude". FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I drunkenly staggered home and crashed on the couch. When I woke up I realized it wasn't my house. FML
Today, I woke up after a night of drinking to find that while I was passed out someone stole my prosthetic leg. FML
Today, I woke up to a tap on my shoulder and had no idea where I was. I quickly discovered It was 11 am and I was still at the bar I had been drinking at the night before. My shoes were gone. FML
Today, I lost my house keys while staggering home drunk, so I decided to climb through an opened window and promptly went to bed. Twenty minutes later the police wake me up while attempting to search my place. The neighbors thought I was a burglar and called the cops. FML
Today, I woke up after passing out at a very small house party. I'd set a three drink limit, but apparently nobody listened, because there were beer cans everywhere, half my stuff was on the floor, and someone had shat in my bathtub. I had to clean all of it up alone. FML
Today, I woke up in hospital after a night of heavy drinking. My friends told me I was beat up by the doorman. After going to the club to watch the security footage, it was revealed I actually fell on my face trying to fight, and caused more damage to myself. FML
Today, I woke up in the shower at my coworker's house, with my clothes on and soaking wet. Apparently, the night before I drank too much and punched my best friend. The sad part is, I passed out on the couch, but somehow ended up in the shower, facing the wrong way. FML
Today, I woke up extremely hungover. I couldn't find my car keys so I went out to my car to see if I had locked them inside. I walked back to the door of my apartment barefoot and empty handed, only to find that I had locked myself out of the apartment. FML
Today, I got home from a week-long vacation with my friend's family. When I got back home, I found the garage door had been completely demolished. My uncontrollably drunk dad blamed me. I don't even drive. FML
Today, I was having a good time drinking with a few friends. Next thing I know, I'm walking down an unknown street, with just one shoe, no wallet and no phone. FML
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Top comments
ifinishlast 0
that's what you get for drinking too much kool-aid
Pinky420 0
Dude I feel for ya!!! I have had many mornings where I don't remember the night before but basically after seeing and hearing from my friends what I did or wasn't suppose to do I was kinda of glad that I didn't remember so yeah I feel for ya
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Comments (81)
Dominigga88 0
So majority of you dip ***** say he deserves this because he drank. So lets see here. 1.He got drunk in his own house. 2. Somebody else took his car. 3. SOMEBODY else took his car and drove it trough his own garage. So because someone else drove into his garage hes automatically at fault, because he was drunk? You dumb ***** make no sense and need to use some logic here.
degco44 0
Thank you for saying that. Him drinking had nothing to do with the real FML moment.
Unlucky_Gun 0
I agree with you, and that's why I voted FYL. However, I can see why someone would vote YDI. OP got so drunk that he blacked out. If he didn't get that drunk he wouldn't have passed out and therefore would've been aware of his friend trying to drive his car. He then would've been able to stop his friend from driving it and wouldn't have a damaged car
Yapanesedidwhat 0
BC whats goin onnnn! partyaaaaang
ohiokanoli 0
That's what you get for drinking you idiot! Seriously, who can subject themselves to total loss of control and then be upset when something goes wrong. Drinking alcohol is one of the stupidest things you could ever do!
chrissy888 0
WHAT? are you kidding me? That's the dumbest thing I've ever heard. Drinking alcohol is not one of the stupidest things you could ever do. What are you, a mormon? Youth isn't complete without a few drunken mishaps/adventures. Some are good, some are bad. It's part of life, and its often a fun part of life. Once again.. drinking alcohol is not one of the stupidest things you can do. ie) doing hardcore drugs, killing people, killing pets, hurting pets, hurting people, giving people infectious diseases, & suicide bombings. A smattering of examples of things that are worse than drinking.
EasilyUnamused 2
Is there a reason why you're making being a Mormon sound like such a lame, uncool thing? I'm an 18 year old Mormon and believe me, my youth has been complete without any drunken mishaps/adventures. It was probably more fun because I remember it all and I was in my right mind during it all. You are someone who says, "What's wrong with drinking? It's just alcohol." Which is fine, that's your deal. But what's wrong with being the person who says, "What's wrong with NOT drinking?" And another question: If alcohol isn't one of the stupidest things you can do, then why does it cause 75,000 deaths a year? And drunk driving? It kills INNOCENT people. I'm not saying the OP is a threat to society, but take a look at the facts behind what alcohol can do before you say it isn't stupid. I personally do not see a point to drinking alcohol and it's definitely not part of life.
crzyprgmr 0
Sounds like a freakin AWESOME party!!!
PhillyFox 0
If you were that drunk, you totally deserved it. If you didn't want it to happen, maybe you should've practiced some self-control with your alcohol.
truckson 0
you should make your friend pay for it, drunk driving is really not cool. it's almost a YDI but still your life sucks!
Bongo8mongo 0
LOL OWNED NOOB!
romancelover 0
dude you are such a MORON!!!!! If you are going to get shitfaced drunk you should'nt get mad when something bad happens!!!!! I ******* hate dumbassses who get drunk w/o thinking about the concequences!!!!!
sparkly 0
dude your young just feel good about the fact that during your life there are going to be many more cars through garage walls!! You are my hero!!
carkel 0
alcohol=YDI wouldn't you atleast want to REMEMBER the horrible shit in your life?