Today, I woke up after a night of drinking in my backyard. All I was wearing were my boxers and one sock. I staggered up to see my car halfway through my garage wall, with a note saying, "Sorry dude". FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I drunkenly staggered home and crashed on the couch. When I woke up I realized it wasn't my house. FML
Today, I woke up after a night of drinking to find that while I was passed out someone stole my prosthetic leg. FML
Today, I woke up to a tap on my shoulder and had no idea where I was. I quickly discovered It was 11 am and I was still at the bar I had been drinking at the night before. My shoes were gone. FML
Today, I lost my house keys while staggering home drunk, so I decided to climb through an opened window and promptly went to bed. Twenty minutes later the police wake me up while attempting to search my place. The neighbors thought I was a burglar and called the cops. FML
Today, I woke up after passing out at a very small house party. I'd set a three drink limit, but apparently nobody listened, because there were beer cans everywhere, half my stuff was on the floor, and someone had shat in my bathtub. I had to clean all of it up alone. FML
Today, I woke up in hospital after a night of heavy drinking. My friends told me I was beat up by the doorman. After going to the club to watch the security footage, it was revealed I actually fell on my face trying to fight, and caused more damage to myself. FML
Today, I woke up in the shower at my coworker's house, with my clothes on and soaking wet. Apparently, the night before I drank too much and punched my best friend. The sad part is, I passed out on the couch, but somehow ended up in the shower, facing the wrong way. FML
Today, I woke up extremely hungover. I couldn't find my car keys so I went out to my car to see if I had locked them inside. I walked back to the door of my apartment barefoot and empty handed, only to find that I had locked myself out of the apartment. FML
Today, I got home from a week-long vacation with my friend's family. When I got back home, I found the garage door had been completely demolished. My uncontrollably drunk dad blamed me. I don't even drive. FML
Today, I was having a good time drinking with a few friends. Next thing I know, I'm walking down an unknown street, with just one shoe, no wallet and no phone. FML
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Top comments
ifinishlast 0
that's what you get for drinking too much kool-aid
Pinky420 0
Dude I feel for ya!!! I have had many mornings where I don't remember the night before but basically after seeing and hearing from my friends what I did or wasn't suppose to do I was kinda of glad that I didn't remember so yeah I feel for ya
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Comments (81)
degco44 0
Get out of here, you heartless jerk. He's gonna have to pay to fix the garage AND the car.
null_fml 11
What makes you so sure he'll have to pay for it?
darkshadow_fml 0
YDI for drinking with people who drink and drive when they're not able to, clearly
Samabenjamim 0
at least they left you a note...
fmlurlife 0
thats awesome! um... sorry about your car though.
fringle 0
I don't see why people like drinking. Nothing good comes from it.
um_duh 0
Thank god that your car didn't go through some innocent person's home or worse, like killing an innocent bystander. I hate douchebags that drink drive like the OP's friends (it seems)
iceman05 0
It seems like the general consensus is that OP deserved this for drinking. Can someone please explain to me how drinking too much means that you deserve for your friend to drive your car through a wall in your house??? Also #25 and #21, lots of good things come from drinking. This awesome story for example!
redbluegreen 41
If there were no idiots, we wouldn't have a site to lurk, would we? (;
fuckingshitt343 0
uhm because he drank so much that he let his, most likely, drunk friend drive his car and therefore caused damage to his garage.
CaptaiNiLL 0
he deserves it for getting wasted and not payin attention to the other guys u can drink but don't get wasted especially at ur party
Bright_Lights 14
This is why I don't drink.
Flight_Recorder 0
theres no way insurance will cover that, its 1. a drinking and driving incident which most likely wont be reported, 2. its not an accident, and 3. what are the odds that hes going to get the thousands of dollars out of his friend to fix the garage?