Today, I woke up after a night of drinking in my backyard. All I was wearing were my boxers and one sock. I staggered up to see my car halfway through my garage wall, with a note saying, "Sorry dude". FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I drunkenly staggered home and crashed on the couch. When I woke up I realized it wasn't my house. FML
Today, I woke up after a night of drinking to find that while I was passed out someone stole my prosthetic leg. FML
Today, I woke up to a tap on my shoulder and had no idea where I was. I quickly discovered It was 11 am and I was still at the bar I had been drinking at the night before. My shoes were gone. FML
Today, I lost my house keys while staggering home drunk, so I decided to climb through an opened window and promptly went to bed. Twenty minutes later the police wake me up while attempting to search my place. The neighbors thought I was a burglar and called the cops. FML
Today, I woke up after passing out at a very small house party. I'd set a three drink limit, but apparently nobody listened, because there were beer cans everywhere, half my stuff was on the floor, and someone had shat in my bathtub. I had to clean all of it up alone. FML
Today, I woke up in hospital after a night of heavy drinking. My friends told me I was beat up by the doorman. After going to the club to watch the security footage, it was revealed I actually fell on my face trying to fight, and caused more damage to myself. FML
Today, I woke up in the shower at my coworker's house, with my clothes on and soaking wet. Apparently, the night before I drank too much and punched my best friend. The sad part is, I passed out on the couch, but somehow ended up in the shower, facing the wrong way. FML
Today, I woke up extremely hungover. I couldn't find my car keys so I went out to my car to see if I had locked them inside. I walked back to the door of my apartment barefoot and empty handed, only to find that I had locked myself out of the apartment. FML
Today, I got home from a week-long vacation with my friend's family. When I got back home, I found the garage door had been completely demolished. My uncontrollably drunk dad blamed me. I don't even drive. FML
Today, I was having a good time drinking with a few friends. Next thing I know, I'm walking down an unknown street, with just one shoe, no wallet and no phone. FML
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Top comments
ifinishlast 0
that's what you get for drinking too much kool-aid
Pinky420 0
Dude I feel for ya!!! I have had many mornings where I don't remember the night before but basically after seeing and hearing from my friends what I did or wasn't suppose to do I was kinda of glad that I didn't remember so yeah I feel for ya
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Comments (81)
SaintJimmy 0
I agree with Marcel Marceau when he says "......"
Zhejan 0
Look at the bright side, at least your penis wasn't halfway through the garage wall
redbluegreen 41
Hey, his girlfriend/step-mom might take offense to be called that!
HahaYDI 0
Dust for fingerprints!!
Intellectualist 0
Haha. This is amusing :) Sucks to be you!
Pinky420 0
Dude I feel for ya!!! I have had many mornings where I don't remember the night before but basically after seeing and hearing from my friends what I did or wasn't suppose to do I was kinda of glad that I didn't remember so yeah I feel for ya
DatWhiteGuy 0
Hang over 3: Suburban parties.
shadexilmaendu 4
Makes me glad I don't hand my keys over when I drink. Your friend better have some damn good insurance.
crudeandrudeguy 29
Am I the only one to consider that he himself crashed the car and left himself the note??
SaintJimmy 0
I originally agreed with the douchenozzle. What is this?! Twatwaffle! Buttmunch much???
netbeui435 3
= drinking problem/alcoholic
sbarre1 0
Are you stupid?
Dominigga88 0
People say the dumbest shit on here.
unomo 0
Because he had one fun night drinking? If someone has sex once does that mean there a nymphomanic? No! so stfu
toink 0
This is boring. Where was your other sock?
ifinishlast 0
that's what you get for drinking too much kool-aid
TheLetterZero 7
YDI for drinking. YDI for drinking. YDI for drinking.
friday1892 0
why does he deservie it for drinking... Really i bet you have drank before. Does that mean if u drink you automatically deserve something bad to happen to you? No, he just got ******* unlucky and had someone else trash his garage and car.
riku3220 2
He doesn't deserve it for drinking so much as he does for drinking too much. If you're not in control of yourself or can't remember what happened the night before becasue you drank then you deserve it.
lkrofct 0
lol @ 14 year olds on the internet
TheLetterZero 7
Nope, I'm clean. Because I'm smart. :)
andrewlmna 0
no...you're just a ****. who cares if he drinks??
Matus 0
How horrible! There should really be a comma between "Sorry, Dude." Don't they teach drunks grammar? Oh, and YDI for drinking.
Unlucky_Gun 0
Does it matter Mr. Grammar Nazi? Do you really fail to understand a 2-word sentence just because of a stupid comma not being there? Wow, you're awfully DUMB! Yeah that's right, I called a comma STUPID! Is el stupido grammar Nazi going to kill me for it? And why don't you yell at the person who wrote the note if you're that bent out of shape over it? OP didn't write it
Clarkx100 0
Lol, ouch. Sucks to be you. Btw, other people here giving YDI for drinking, stop being self righteous. Many people drink.
flying_vegan 0
EXACTLY! Everyone (everyone!) enjoys the occasional drink, and at least he's not doing crystal meth (and if he is, he isn't claiming it to be the cause of his FMLs). Anywho, this guy does deserve it, but not for drinking. He deserves it for wearing socks. If you cannot root your spirit into the earth then YDI.