Today, my five year-old daughter came up to me and told me she wanted to be a nun. When I asked why, she replied, "So I won't get my heart broken by a boy." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my five year old daughter asked me what a divorce was. When I asked why she wanted to know, she replied with "Daddy wants one. He says you can have me." FML
Today, my 5-year-old daughter said "Mommy, why doesn't anyone wanna marry you?" I've been asking myself the same question for all too many years. FML
Today, my 4 year old niece asked me why I didn't have a job or wife. FML
Today, my adorable five and a half year old boy told me that when he grows up he's going to be my boyfriend. I thought it was kinda cute until I asked him why. "Because you need one." FML
Today, I told my 4-year-old daughter that when she grew up she could work at a daycare, like me, to help all of the little kids like her. She started crying because she thought it was a bad job to have. FML
Today, my daughter told me she wanted to divorce me. FML
Today, my daughter asked me to join the Army so that she wouldn't have to see me anymore. She's four. FML
Today, my 4 year old daughter walked in while I was changing my shirt. She said "When I get older I am going to have big boobies just like you." I'm her dad. FML
Today, I was a bit upset to learn that my 13 year-old daughter had a boyfriend. When she noticed, she assured me that I shouldn't worry, because "it's just for sex anyway". FML
Today, my daughter is twelve and doesn’t have a single friend, despite being kind and sweet. When I asked her why, she said, “All the other kids want me to die.” FML
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Top comments
franticravyn 7
that's cute in a way…
Coon123 0
mature 5 year old
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Comments (127)
in8 1
Maybe her mommy needs to stop whining about how men make her soooo sad. You are her role model, leave your daddy issues for your therapist.
just_a_dude_ 0
Aww. :(
ilovejer 1
how the *** is that fml??
kokosweet 0
that's adorable.
stevenmx86 8
Again, why is this bad? She's 5! It's cute! They don't really mean it... Wtf
LowLives 9
Smart kid. :)
im_awsome 2
either way (except If she becomes a lesbian) she might even up with her heart broken .
CrystalClearly 8
Who has this 5 year old been talking to? What has she been watching to make such a mature comment? (I little disturbing)
lu95 16
how exactly is this an fml?
CitrusGirl 0
That is the saddest cute thing I have ever heard.