Today, the police arrived at my door, telling me my child had been caught vandalizing. A boy who looked about 15 hugged me and said, "Hey, mum." I'm only 26 years-old and had never seen this boy in my life. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, early in the morning, I got a knock on the door from the police. It seems my son and his friend had been caught throwing toilet paper at a neighbour's house. He's 23. FML
Today, after nearly a year of being stalked, harassed and even terrorized, the police finally found out who my stalker was. It was my 19-year-old son, who thought it would be a fun prank to pull. FML
Today, I had to chase down and tackle a boy (around 11 or 12) at my workplace after I caught him snatching someone's wallet and trying to quickly sneak out with it. Now everyone thinks I have something against children, even after I returned the stranger's wallet and explained that the little brat is a thief. FML
Today, a punk-looking college kid was making fun of my mentally handicapped son. Out of anger, I punched him in the face. I got handcuffed and thrown into a police car. The kid stood there laughing and pointing at me. FML
Today, my 14 year old son got suspended and I had to pay for the damage after he sprayed "FUCK THE POLICE" on the back wall of his school. I'm a policeman. FML
Today, while working at my local supermarket, I found a boy lost and wandering about, so I took him to the front desk. My reward from his mother was a slap around the face and harsh words for supposedly having kidnapped him. FML
Today, I took my child to the park. Having been there an hour, another mum came up to me and we started talking. She then told me that one kid had been harassing her children, pointing to my child. When she asked which one was mine I pointed to a random kid. It was hers. FML
Today, I went over to my friend's house. Her 5 year-old son answered the door and when he saw me said, "Oh great, it's YOU!" and slammed the door in my face. FML
Today, at the park, I saw my toddler fall. I rushed over, picked him up, and said, “It’s OK, Mum’s here.” He looked confused. So did his real mum. I had mistakenly grabbed a random child instead of my own in front of everyone. They weren't even wearing similar clothes. FML
Today, I walked outside to find someone had egged my house and smashed a pumpkin onto my car. I later discovered that the perpetrator was my own 8 year old son. FML
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Top comments
Palirose 22
Tell the police that, so that they can take him to his real home and family.
tacojauns 45
Congratulations on your new son!
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Comments (70)
jake5laura 6
Nope, I saved the kids ass and offered to drive him home and not tell his parents.. But not before I made him pay me the same amount he was fined for the vandalizing as punishment, and after finding out he lives in our street he's also mowing our lawns for a month or i'll rat him out to his parents. I would've preffered to be taken home lol
hipsterhunter 9
And OP delivers.
drzfinest062011 4
lmao I woild of been like who the **** is this get em away from me
rabbitsarecutexx 3
Do you live in frankston lol
fmlinact 12
Put him up as a ward of the state then.
fml121785 14
Yea, he didn't think that through too well did he? I'm wondering how 82 people could have voted YDI on this?! Was it their fault for answering the door?!
egc573 40
31-That is wrong on so many levels. 5th grade? I didn't even know what a penis WAS in 5th grade, and I sure as heck wouldn't have wanted to see one! Sadly, pregnancy at 11 would indeed be very possible. I believe the youngest mother ever on record was a Peruvian girl, age 5. Yes, 5.
padlarf 14
"Officer, I have never seen this boy in my life."
napalm_uniqorn 27
This is the best thing I have read all day. and to make it even better, it's from my country, and my state!! This is one really really smart kid. Who would have thought to do that? Congrats to the kid!
Scribe_fml 8
You never know, she could have been raped. I've decided not to judge her until I hear the whole story.
ocramavaf 15
Congratulations on becoming a mother, now discipline him properly