Today, the police arrived at my door, telling me my child had been caught vandalizing. A boy who looked about 15 hugged me and said, "Hey, mum." I'm only 26 years-old and had never seen this boy in my life. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, early in the morning, I got a knock on the door from the police. It seems my son and his friend had been caught throwing toilet paper at a neighbour's house. He's 23. FML
Today, after nearly a year of being stalked, harassed and even terrorized, the police finally found out who my stalker was. It was my 19-year-old son, who thought it would be a fun prank to pull. FML
Today, I had to chase down and tackle a boy (around 11 or 12) at my workplace after I caught him snatching someone's wallet and trying to quickly sneak out with it. Now everyone thinks I have something against children, even after I returned the stranger's wallet and explained that the little brat is a thief. FML
Today, a punk-looking college kid was making fun of my mentally handicapped son. Out of anger, I punched him in the face. I got handcuffed and thrown into a police car. The kid stood there laughing and pointing at me. FML
Today, my 14 year old son got suspended and I had to pay for the damage after he sprayed "FUCK THE POLICE" on the back wall of his school. I'm a policeman. FML
Today, while working at my local supermarket, I found a boy lost and wandering about, so I took him to the front desk. My reward from his mother was a slap around the face and harsh words for supposedly having kidnapped him. FML
Today, I took my child to the park. Having been there an hour, another mum came up to me and we started talking. She then told me that one kid had been harassing her children, pointing to my child. When she asked which one was mine I pointed to a random kid. It was hers. FML
Today, I went over to my friend's house. Her 5 year-old son answered the door and when he saw me said, "Oh great, it's YOU!" and slammed the door in my face. FML
Today, at the park, I saw my toddler fall. I rushed over, picked him up, and said, “It’s OK, Mum’s here.” He looked confused. So did his real mum. I had mistakenly grabbed a random child instead of my own in front of everyone. They weren't even wearing similar clothes. FML
Today, I walked outside to find someone had egged my house and smashed a pumpkin onto my car. I later discovered that the perpetrator was my own 8 year old son. FML
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Top comments
Palirose 22
Tell the police that, so that they can take him to his real home and family.
tacojauns 45
Congratulations on your new son!
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Comments (70)
Free4ever 6
Haha oh man that's a good one. So did you cover for the kid?
strawberrywine22 30
Pedobear strikes again?
TylerDC 24
absolutely hilarious! I say, Cop FAIL
laden_swallow09 35
A troublemaking kid like him likely isn't going to carry any ID with him, so all the police have to go on is his word. Obviously not always accurate, but what else do they have?
fatcow282 8
I would assume a photo
woainishamu 21
It was because he was under the weather. (Australia)
hannaaaahr 33
No, just no.
woainishamu 21
Yes, just yes.
whyusofat 17
Your comments gave me the flu
oj101 33
Not sure who's worse. The police for believing such a retarded story, or the 15 year old guy blaming an innocent person.
strawberrywine22 30
Well technically the kid didn't "blame" her, and the cops can't really tell for sure. She could have been a stepmom, an adoptive mom, our been older than she looks. My sister looks twenty but is actually 33 and has a teenage son.
baby_shaker9000 5
Did you even read the FML?
Alan2 24
Happens all the time. Sometimes age is hard to tell from appearances
rawr_ily96 24
Heck, I'm a living example of what you guys are saying. I'm 17 and I was mistaken for a 12-year old by a senior at my high school.
LovesSushi 25
Maybe that is his real scam. Now he is in your house, and can report back if you have anything to steal. Or maybe I just have an overactive imagination
strawberrywine22 30
Pedobear strikes again?
Ramo_11 8
don't snitch on the poor kid. most of all guys have been there at some point.
SuperDanielNL 23
He gets her in trouble, she just has to let him go because he's a boy? Bullshit
AurumPotestasEst 16
Please don't make blanket statements, like, "most guys have been there," #25. You don't speak for the entire male population.
SeepingSarcasm 7
Please don't make obnoxious statements like ''You don't speak for the entire male population.'' when #25 clearly said ''most'' and not all guys. Implying that most guys have been in a situation where they caused shit by just acting like a stupid young kid.
laden_swallow09 35
Even saying "most" is still making a big assumption. A false one, at that.
awesomeosaurous 2
Please don't assume that using the phrase "most guys" is cause for you to go all alpha dog on someone and type a whole spiel about making assumptions because in the end it doesn't even matter.
Jordath_Fil 11
SHUT UP! Now, children that is enough bickering. We are in public and if you don't want to go to bed without desert then you will stop this bickering at ONCE! Do I make myself clear?
SeepingSarcasm 7
It being a false assumption can be debatable, as most guys have atleast once in their lives been in trouble for some stupid thing they've done. #63 - I AM ALPHA MALE! Just joking, actually you are very right, this really doesn't matter indeed. As for #69, we will have dessert! *starts 1st wave of tantrums*
asb818 14
69...dessert...hmmm. You said it, not me.
Epikouros 32
Maybe he set the whole thing up because he wanted to hug you. You know how 15-year old boys are.
whyisitincapital 25
I agree. He just wanted to feel her boobs against his own chest.
StalkerChick 13
Totally possible. I knew a girl who got pregnant in 5th grade(supposed to be in 6th). Her son was in the 1st grade when she was in 12th.