Today, I was walking to get ice-cream with my boyfriend. When we were ordering our cone, the girl who was scooping it said to my boyfriend, "Hey I know you! You're the one who slept with my sister-in-law the other night." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my friend called to say my boyfriend was at a diner with another woman. I immediately went and caught them in a deep conversation. I slapped him and yelled "Who's this bitch!?" It turns out she's his half sister. FML
Today, while at my boyfriend's cousin's birthday party, I was hanging around with his sister as I didn't know anyone. She was talking to some friends when one of them asked her, "So, is your brother still going out with that crazy chick?" Her answer was to introduce me. FML
Today, I had a meeting in the town where my ex-girlfriend works. After the meeting, I bought some ice cream and sat on a bench in a public place. She came across with her girlfriends laughing and obviously having fun. She only looked in my direction briefly. I threw the ice cream into the trash. FML
Today, my identical twin sister's boyfriend walked over to me, and whispered in my ear, "I know what you look like naked." FML
Today, I ran into my serious boyfriend of two years at a restaurant. He was sitting with another girl. I went over and asked him who she was. He replied, "Who are you?" Apparently I was the secret girlfriend. FML
Today, I was in my local supermarket's frozen aisle and I started doing a little dance of joy because my favorite ice cream was on sale. I turned around to see my ex and his new girlfriend watching me. FML
Today, I met my boyfriend's brother. When he saw me, he whispered into my boyfriend's ear, "So, this is your bitch eh? Nice!" FML
Today, I went to my boyfriend's work to surprise him. When I got there, I called him on his phone to tell him to turn around. I saw him look at his phone. His co-worker next to him asked who that was. He replied, "Just this fat chick I know." FML
Today, I was hanging out with a friend at an ice cream place, and a guy started chatting with us. As he eventually went to leave, he told me, "That's a nice looking date you got there." Then he turned to my friend. "Wish I could say the same to you." FML
Today, it’s my girlfriend’s birthday. I took her out to her favorite restaurant to celebrate. The waitress serving us looked oddly familiar but I didn’t think anything of it until she said when we collected the check, “Aren’t you my sister’s husband?” I forgot she had a younger sister who worked here. FML
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Top comments
gruvychild 17
I hope he was wearing the ice cream by the time you were done!
bthomas0319 2
I'm guessing that was the last time y'all saw each other
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Comments (261)
MrXerxes5 6
Don't you just hate it when people mistake sleeping together with sex?
Mipz 2
I wish I could hit thumbs down more than once.
HomeAl0ne 20
Allow me.
hommiecogley 8
Wow what a player. Dumb his ass and shove the ice cream cone in his face and the other one in his pants. Than slap him around a few times. Lol.
iloveAAF 4
What a prick! Hope you dump his sorry ass!
goshpeople 4
Hasn't anyone thought of the possibility that the ice-cream scoop girl said it to a random male customer out with a girl, just so she could witness the fireworks that would inevitably follow?
bigassfish97 0
Oh shit
Black_Letter 19
Great input #59.
thinkinboutyou12 0
Hopefully it was a mass identity crisis?? Maybe?...
ramboman19 8
The other secret that needed to be protected was the timing of the use of the bomb. If the enemy knew the US had developed and tested it, then they would know it would be used soon and could possibly stop it's deployment. The bomb had to be sent to the Pacific Theater by ship and loaded on to bombers. All of this had to be kept secure.
WolfKing501 0
Wtf what does this have to do with the FmL?
ramboman19 8
The other secret that needed to be protected was the timing of the use of the bomb. If the enemy knew the US had developed and tested it, then they would know it would be used soon and could possibly stop it's deployment. The bomb had to be sent to the Pacific Theater by ship and loaded on to bombers. All of this had to be kept secure.
ramboman19 8
The other secret that needed to be protected was the timing of the use of the bomb. If the enemy knew the US had developed and tested it, then they would know it would be used soon and could possibly stop it's deployment. The bomb had to be sent to the Pacific Theater by ship and loaded on to bombers. All of this had to be kept secure.
katay97 6
how can she be her sister-in-law if she's not married? that doesn't make any sense..