Today, the couple with three noisy toddlers in the apartment above mine finally moved out. A couple with a non-stop crying newborn moved in. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, at 2 in the morning, a noisy work crew started up in the parking lot next to my apartment. What were they doing at that ungodly hour? Installing a light that now shines right into my window. FML
Today, I got a new babysitting job. Every time the little girl goes to the bathroom, she screams and cries until I wipe her. She's 7 years old. FML
Today, I found myself sneaking into my apartment to avoid the old lady who lives next to me. Funnily enough, I moved into my own apartment because I was tired of sneaking into it to avoid my mom, who lived with me. FML
Today, I woke up next to my roommate staring in horror. She said I was singing and farting in my sleep. Loudly. FML
Today, I found out that my boyfriend of two years has a beautiful daughter. That's cool, except she's one year old. FML
Today, as I waited to fly home, a very attractive woman smiled and gestured towards the seat next to me. However, a hyperactive child and his mother barged past into said empty seats. The woman really hit it off with the guy behind, while I was stuck listening to a kid scream at Angry Birds. FML
Today, I woke up to a glorious sunrise, fresh coffee, and a bleached lawn. My neighbors on both sides have constantly fought with each other since before I even moved in, which I guess explains the note taped to my window saying, "Pick a side." FML
Today, I was with my 3 year-old son in the doctor's office. During the exam, he informed the doctor that he doesn't sleep in mommy's bed anymore because mommy sleeps in her underwear and farts all night long. FML
Today, my sister told me not to come over anymore because her baby is scared of my face. FML
Today, I came home from work to find my son and his friends attempting to find out how many of them could fit into one of my pairs of pants. So far, five. FML
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Top comments
qm4life 0
Awww... Soon to be a toddler... Here we go again! FYL
LosAngelesSon 8
Stop complaining, you could be the couple with a non stop crying baby.
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Comments (140)
TheEpicMilkMan 13
knock on the ceiling of your apartment like a old hag? :3 idk what to tell you tbh lol being honest :P
TrippingOnAcid 29
Well that's just out of your control, I'm afraid.
perdix 31
Healthy newborns do not literally cry non-stop. Either you are exaggerating or your problem will soon solve itself.
TheDrifter 24
They do if you ignore them long enough. When mine were little I would just turn my hearing aids off and let their mother deal with the noise.
ohmandapants 17
^ first off, you're an asshole. Secondly, healthy babies do NOT cry non stop. Maybe the baby has colic.
TrippingOnAcid 29
Just use the sign next time
jonriise18 3
Discipline. Start when they're a newborn, they won't be crying like a bitch their whole life.
Fahrenheit63 5
1 better than 3.
xgetxbentx 13
Yeah, that tends to happen when you move into what I'm assuming is an apartment, get some ear plugs and get over it. Next time move somewhere where they don't allow kids.
Gherazz 0
Kill it
Nataleena 1
A white noise maker works wonders for me living in the hood with constant bass and screaming kids outside who also use cars as trampolines. Wonders.
bizarre_ftw 22
Once it shuts up you'll only have one noisy toddler. Half full :D