Today, a guy asked for my number at the grocery store, but I politely told him I wasn't interested. He followed me home and took a shit on my doorstep. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, the man who hit on me in a store and asked for my number showed up on my doorstep to inquire about my couch for sale. With his wife. FML
Today, while out for lunch, a guy approached me and asked for my number. I politely declined. To my dismay, he dropped to his knees, grabbed his head, and started moaning about how nobody ever gives him a chance. I felt the accusing stares. FML
Today, I asked a cute guy for his number but instead he gave it to my gay friend. When my friend later called him, it turned out that he'd given him his number just to get rid of me and wasn't expecting him to call. FML
Today, I woke up to a homeless man relentlessly shitting on my porch. FML
Today, I met a really cute guy at work. He asked for my number, and I wrote it down on a piece of paper. After looking at the paper, he crumpled it up, yelled "Do you think I'm stupid? I know the rejection hotline when I see it", and walked away. It was my real phone number. FML
Today, I was getting catcalled downtown by a guy I've never seen before. Then he told me he knows where I live, and accurately described my apartment while he followed me for 2 blocks. FML
Today, I took my dog for a walk. He started crapping on someone's lawn, then I noticed that the owner was outside and giving me a death stare. Not knowing what to do, I picked up the crap with my bare hands. The man started laughing at me. FML
Today, at work, a customer asked for my number. When I declined, he made a huge scene, shouting and scaring other customers. He tipped me seven cents. FML
Today, I had a very good-looking guy ask for my number while I was at work, but due to our policies I had to turn him down. FML
Today, while working at my truck stop, I helped a trucker check his tires. He seemed like a pretty nice guy, and we chatted for a bit. After he took off and I walked back inside, I went to clean the shower he was in before. Turns out he took a shit on the floor. His wife had been in there with him. FML
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Top comments
Pleonasm 36
He wasn't able to go out with you but he was still able to dump you.
SharnaaaBanana 22
That's disgusting. Who does that.
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Comments (131)
aamir251 18
Oh shit!
dawnimus 21
How is not wanting to date someone "playing princess"?! By your logic, women should date every single person that asks, regardless of whether they want to, whether they're already in a relationship, or whether they're actually attracted to that gender.
Pleonasm 36
Apparently women no longer have a choice in who they date. Who knew? Now if you'll excuse me, my dating options just got a LOT more numerous.
22milesaway 13
If you walked home, you should've called the cops after a couple of blocks. I'd you drove, then you should've gone straight back to work and called the cops. Either way, if you didn't call the cops before you got home, YDI.
SpamPam 18
No one deserves unvalidated harassment you jerk, she probably didn't know he was following her (probably was a car) until she got home
RedPillSucks 33
Agreed with #22. No one deserves this. Also, it's not like the guy is going to stick around waiting the 20 minutes for the cops to show up. Unless she's in the middle of being attacked, they're going to treat it as a non-emergency.
Marzell 12
Well, considering you're apparently JtHM... I believe you belive this.
awkward_gothlady 32
It's so easy to know what to do when you're not the person it's happening to, isn't it, #18?
hulopro 16
He probably hated your doorstep.
sabine123_fml 5
Call the cops
SpamPam 18
His trilby and neckbeard gave it away
worldclassrager 41
Now he knows where you live...bad move there...just give your number and then change yours or give a fake
blcusername 27
How'd you get it cleaned up? I'd love a follow-up on this
feven 32
How exactly did you "politely decline."
limabeans101029 21
Even if she hadn't been polite about it, that would definitely not justify following her home.
amisenho 11
It happens quite often. It's no wonder women have such bad reputations for having "bitchy" attitudes towards men. Usually, a guy will get rejected, and, in order to save face or assert masculinity, they'll relay the rejection to their "bros" as, "Well, she was a stuck-up bitch anyway; so glad I got over her like a bad habit." This failure to accept reality is an artifact from the idea that a woman should be "lucky" a man has interest in her and is obliged to reciprocate said interest. A woman can be as nice and understanding as she wants to be, but if the right ignorant man comes along, she's usually the one who has to pay for his behavior, whether by tarnishing her reputation (courtesy of the man) or by finding poop on her porch.