Today, a man on the bus questioned my sexuality for being a male nurse. I asked him what he did and he said he worked in a garage. When I pointed out that I work with sexy nurses all day and he works with sweaty guys, he punched me in the stomach. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I went to the doctor's office because I was sick. The male nurse led me back and when he weighed me, he said "Why do I get all the beefy girls today?". FML
Today, on the bus, a little boy gave me the dirtiest look, pointed at my pregnant stomach, and menacingly said, "I know what you did." FML
Today, I was on the bus, heading to work, when the girl beside me started yelling at me, claiming I was staring down her shirt. I did no such thing, but the driver nonetheless stopped the bus and made me get off, all under the withering glares of the other passengers. FML
Today, a total stranger on the bus called me hideous and threw a soda in my face. I only asked him if the seat next to him was taken. FML
Today, a very attractive man asked me out. I'd have been flattered if I weren't the nurse assigned to his laboring wife. FML
Today, I was riding the public bus and a really fat, smelly guy sat next to me. He put his arm around my shoulder and asked me if I was single. My stop wasn't for three more miles. FML
Today, on the bus, a large smelly man was sat next to me, pushing me against the divider and sliding into me on every turn. When he got up for his stop, his pants had loosened and his bare ass was staring me in the face. FML
Today, on the train, a man kept grabbing my crotch. When I told him to stop, I got yelled at for harassing an elderly man. FML
Today, I’m doing my clinicals at a teaching hospital. An irate patient began hurling slurs and demanded I leave the room during her exam. She didn’t care that I was a student; she thought I was a man. I’m not now nor have I ever been male. FML
Today, while working a night shift completely alone at a truck stop, a trucker asked me to get in the shower with him for a "funner night shift", and threw his towels and clothes at me when I told him no. FML
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Top comments
Govester 4
I'm thinking that even though you got punched in the stomach that is still a "win" on your half.
1PaulyD 9
I work in a car shop and I would love to work as a nurse now that you put it that way haha
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Comments (220)
skoob1 12
Wow, this is such an honor... I've never had the first comment...
justjazzmyn 3
And this is why you shouldn't.
nofearjenshere 12
You edited it and that was the best you could do?
Govester 4
I'm thinking that even though you got punched in the stomach that is still a "win" on your half.
Tali147 16
I agree. Totally worth it.
X_Codes 11
Pretty much... a punch in the stomach means "I'm too stupid to handle witty people like you in a mature way, so I'm just going to act like a turd and pretend I'm better than you."
russfml 31
Yea good for you man, he's a dip shit and you owned him with a great point. Sounds like he might be the one who's gay after all lol
Mitcha857 0
34 I agree completely. OP wins even though he got punched in the stomach. Just because his job title is nurse doesn't mean he's gay. He could be on his way towards becoming a doctor. Now on the other hand if OP worked at chip n dales and his stage name was "sparkles" that's a whole different story. The moral of the story: DON'T TALK TO STRANGERS ON THE BUS!
GingerPanda94 6
And you have 'hot nurse' to treat the pain :)
Purplefluff 6
Even though it probably doesn't seem like it, you won! Enjoy sweet, but very painful victory
kevinn95 0
Definitely a win but on the other hand i would question ur sexuality again just because if someone punched me i would punch him back and im willing to bet u didnt
aaahhhfire21 0
Well they always say the truth hurts just never who it hurts
IIFenix 3
I would never question a guys sexuality if they are a male nurse..some of the stuff they see are horrible one of my friends is a male nurse and he's had to treat a guy who had a screw driver jammed into his eyeball...from what he told me it was sick as hell.
baddawg365 0
I don't know if I should push your life sucks or not... Because it really doesn't, I mean minus the fact that he got punched, working as a nurse is a productive occupation and as he said he works with pretty ladies. But he most definitely doesn't deserve it... I'm stumped OP. I'm sorry the guy was a jerk but hey have fun at work
ColdplaySucks 18
Higher paying job with hot nurses? He's just mad.
disneydraeer 10
90- male dancers get to dance with half naked girls all the time. That's how we lure them in...
aaahhhfire21 0
83- ****** awesome pic
oneFUCKINword 8
You definitely won that one. Maybe you should ask a co-worker to kiss it better? Haha
baddawg365 0
Right back at ya 126
peasonearth 8
400th like c;
kocoman500 2
126; third down vote
alpaquette91 9
One: you can comment on comments. So why did you comment on the original post page and not on 83 post? .. And two: that picture had been circulated over the Internet for over a year, or more... If this is you first time seeing it you have no life.
fersuremandeee 9
I feel like if it's his first time seeing it, he isn't on the computer much and he has a life...just a thought
Moneylover103 1
Actually if it's their first time seeing it. That means they have a life and have better things to do then look through stupid pictures.
mimiminx 23
Or maybe he's happy being a nurse?!! Not every nurse wants to be a doctor!!!
nofearjenshere 12
Just be happy he didn't have a weapon on him.
ChrisG93 8
What if his hands were registered weapons lol.
boydeee01 7
Then they would be registered weapons.
sexygurllolz 1
i like burritos
SadDashie92 3
123 - That's nice that you like burritos, but I'm not sure why you felt the need to randomly share this with people on an FML...
alexup24 13
True story
DobiesJS2012 9
Then he'd be Chuck Norris.
LouisianaBob 9
#3 why would anyone be happy that an angry person was not carrying a weapon? How ridiculous.
Llamacod 11
ugh.. 138, because an angry person with a weapon may use said weapon... duh. I can't believe you really couldn't think that puzzler through.
nchov523 11
154, sarcasm. Yeah.
DURPINATOR3000 6
Stupid bitch
nicopasselebac2 0
Get a weapon find him and make him pay.
smartbaby62 1
Who told you to tell the truth. =D
Dr0reos 8
Well OP thats how you know you've won
1PaulyD 9
I work in a car shop and I would love to work as a nurse now that you put it that way haha
reallytho3 11
Lol all of a sudden nursing sounds really good rite now
TheDrudgeChild 4
I bet OP makes way more money than the guy who hit him.
Wheredidgrungego 12
I know what I'm going to be when I get out of college! ....that's right! A garage guy!
IIFenix 3
72 I bet neither of them make that much...they both take the bus lol.
Calyx_fml 22
Dream big. You can be a Brazilian waxer for the Playboy mansion.
horneyhic 15
Ur coworkers are nice but u can't swear at the patients like u can a car and u still have to change grandmas diaper
Andr913 13
My new goal: work part time as a nurse, part time as a garage guy.
MischievousV 8
I'm a nurse. But in the military so my pay is lower. It's still 30K a year, but you can work your way up. My civilian friends get 45k. Nursing is a rewarding field, it's not all wiping asses. When you put it that way, you really demean my job.
permannator 10
You can just "nurse" it back to health! No? Ok I'll just go drink bleach now
nofearjenshere 12
Please don't. That doesn't sound too healthy.
BiGBoYWaNTsSoDa 14
(18)I'm pretty sure it was sarcasm
ChrisG93 8
Idk its hard to tell with some people lol.
nofearjenshere 12
35- I know. I was kidding as well.
BiGBoYWaNTsSoDa 14
(40)Oh.. Well that's ironic on my part
xavier21_fml 6
Ah, the old 'I'm getting thumbed down so I'm going to say I was joking' trick :)
boofgall 16
51- Yeah, especially after not saying anything remotely funny, too.
Senseless_487 29
You were kidding that he shouldn't drink bleach? That's just evil!
ManInTheMachine 20
Okay guys, chill out. It was a bad joke. Lets move on...
bunniex1 11
Hey save some for me!
aleeshttylXD 9
one time i needed to bleach my shirt and i puked because of the smell... :/
AbbyAbyss 5
All I can think of is Jacksfilms saying "I'm going to go home now, to chug some bleach." I'm obsessed.
starflyer59 17
88: nobody cares.
trivel64 16
91- AGH! A FELLOW BRONY! HELLO, MY DEAR!
RedPillSucks 33
@103 - I thought Bronies were male. Should she be called a "Branie", "Gronie", "Femoronie"????
PYLrulz 17
#6 - Don't worry, we lol'ed
evilplatypus 39
108 - Pegasis.
SadDashie92 3
108 - Bronies can be both male and female. However, females can also be called pegasisters, but I think most prefer Brony.
AbbyAbyss 5
103- Hello, darling!
blaackandprouud 20
(130) dude a brony is a BRO who likes My Little Pony, therefore a guy.
blaackandprouud 20
^Just urban dictionary that shit.
Quinn32 16
By Barnabus Stinson's definition in the Bro Code, a girl can be a bro.
flea_of_death 23
Yet another thread taken over by ponies...its amazing how the internet works sometimes XD
alpaquette91 9
88- wow cool story bro, tell it again
GNR93 14
I think I'm the only one catching the reference here, but I think he should. Bleach is made of water and we are made of water therefore we are bleach, how bad could it be.
skittlestrailmix 14
"No drink the bleach!" pickles lmao
xxBFMVAAMIWxx 18
97 - Your comment has the same amount of upvotes as his (88) had downvotes
Needafarm 22
Sounds a lot like being a male cheerleader. You get to look up girls skirts all practice, just hope they are cute cheerleaders. I've seen some pretty big gross looking female nurses that might as well work at garages.
Discombobulated9 12
The fact that you judge women's abilities within work enviornments based upon their appearance says a lot about your intelligence.
MidnaLink 35
Needafarm I would honestly feel sorry for any woman who had to ever work with you.
Hiimhaileypotter 53
Adding to 24's comment... It's not good things that it says about your character, either.
fersuremandeee 9
Those "gross looking" female nurses assist in keeping you alive and healthy. Looks only go so far, but the abilities that nurses have are astounding -- their work takes so much heart, practice and dedication -- think about that before you judge a book by its cover.
soad2014 7
I bet he thought you were a sexy nurse...or maybe he's just jealous. :)
GNR93 14
Going off topic and at the risk of jacking your thread, thank you for liking good music. Back on topic, I've got one thing to say. Win.
nicopasselebac2 0
He thought you were a pussy he could abuse and he was right. Get back at him karma-style with a touch of religious creepiness. Maybe he has children or loved ones? Be creative.
nicopasselebac2 0
He thought you were a pussy he could abuse and he was right. Get back at him karma-style with a touch of religious creepiness. Maybe he has children or loved ones? Be creative.
Yarrachel 16
I love how when women get jobs that were considered masculine (like doctors) it's okay because they are "upgrading" but when a man gets a job that is stereotypically feminine that's bad because what self respecting man would want to work a girly job, amirite?
CallMeMcFeelii 14
I'd actually prefer a male nurse over a woman. Nothing against you gals but I swear when I give blood they stab and stab and stab. The males get it first try everytime.
RedPillSucks 33
Amusingly enough, Nurses and Teachers (and other jobs, I'm sure) were male jobs until WWI and WWII where men were mostly occupied with killing and dying in the wars. Women joined the workforce en-mass to fill in.
evilplatypus 39
Women actually had a firm grasp on the teaching field before WWI. They usually couldn't teach once they were married depending on the area, but female teachers were by no means "rare" (just look at frontier schools), nor was teaching considered a masculine or feminine position.
styphon 5
They also had a firm grasp on nursing. Look at paintings of operating rooms in the 1800s, it's male doctors with a bunch of female nurses.
stary1722 6
Last time I had a male nurse, he stuck me with the needle three times, moved the needle around in my skin and still couldn't do it right.... So that's not always true.
sammyjanette 17
Who cares what some loser on the bus thinks about your sexuality. You know you like girls. And, even if you didn't you still should be proud of who you are.
doctorhook86 25
14: That's easy to say, but tougher to do. When you're a man in our culture, you're measured against archetypical "maleness"; you're expected to be strong, independent, brave, and heterosexual. God help ye if you don't measure up. Calling a man "gay" or "pussy" is at least as socially damaging as is calling a woman "****" or "*****"--in both cases, it accuses that person of failing at their gender.
sammyjanette 17
You only have one life to live. When you are on your deathbed the LAST thing you will be thinking about is what someone else thought of you. But, if you live your life for someone else that will plague you in your deathbed. You will be filled with regrets. The question is not whether someone else thinks you’re “gay” or a “pussy”. The question is whether you think who you are and what you are is ok with you. And, another thing…I never understood why people especially “alpha males” use “pussy as an insult. You can usually bring one of those idiots down with the mere thought of pussy. It’s quite silly when you think about it.
RedPillSucks 33
Yes, but sometimes you have to live outside the box society wedges you into in order to really understand how insanely stupid some of these societal labels are.