Today, while trying to kill a spider in my kitchen, I thought it would be wise to throw a bottle at it. The bottle hit the wall, bounced off the fridge and hit me in the face. The lucky spider crawled away, and is surely still laughing somewhere. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I saw a spider in my kitchen. Freaked, but trying to be humane, I held out a piece of paper so it would climb on, and I would then put it outside. However, it jumped out of nowhere and landed on my face. My reaction was to whack at where the spider was - my face. I stumbled around, disoriented; the spider got away. FML
Today, I found a big spider on my wall. I have arachnophobia, and I was trying to kill it with my shoe. I pulled back and hit myself in the face, causing me to fall backwards. The spider is still alive somewhere in my house. FML
Today, I saw a spider crawling across a poster in my bedroom, so I smacked the spot below it to scare the spider into climbing back up the wall. Instead, because the poster wasn't completely flat to the wall, I catapulted the spider straight into my face. FML
Today, I saw a spider in my room. I got a piece of paper to try and put it outside. As I reached, it jumped out of nowhere and landed on my face. My reaction was to smack where the spider was - my face. I fell on the floor disoriented. The spider got away. FML
Today, I was taking a shower when I noticed the huge spider above my head. Now, being the smart person I am, I sprayed the water up at it, causing it to fall. Right on my face. FML
Today, I tried to catch a spider in a glass. It was on the paper and I wanted it to fall into the glass, but I moved the paper the wrong way, screeched like a banshee and flung the glass at the floor. I was barefoot. FML
Today, I woke up to a spider crawling across my face. I was so shocked that my new house had spiders, I jumped up out of bed, only to slip on the floor and land face down onto the bed. Wouldn't you know it, right where the spider was at that point. I can still taste the juice I squished out of it. FML
Today, I saw what I thought was a spider. Wanting to kill it as quickly as possible, I smacked my hand against the wall with force. It was a nail. FML
Today, there was a huge spider on my ceiling, so I grabbed a shoe to deal with it. Just as I jumped up to smush it, my idiot brother flicked the light off. I missed the spider, but it didn't miss my face as the impact caused it to fall. FML
Today, I was laying on the couch, reading, when I noticed a spindly leg poking round the corner of my book. Upon realising it was a spider, I calmly and rationally threw my book across the room, breaking the TV. FML
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Top comments
Tsunami87 17
When is it ever wise to throw a bottle at a living thing?
itssosparkly 21
"I thought it would be wise." You know it's a YDI when...
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Comments (77)
Tsunami87 17
When is it ever wise to throw a bottle at a living thing?
parsonova 1
Have you seen that clip of Justin Bieber geting hit by bottle? I'd say that was a wise move. Although, I'm not sure he qualifies as a living thing, he's more like a virus.
wallandpiece 16
Why didn't you just pick it up and release it outside? There was no need to try and kill it.
rattusrattus 19
@12 Please don't insult the noble virus. Justin Bieber is a rare example of Canadian rudeness.
blackheart24 10
18- Justin Beiber is a bad example of what happens when the condom breaks.
I_Punch_Babies 7
...or when abortions fail
drinkPINK 4
27 - your profile picture is false. You were never physically a sperm; you were an egg at your youngest.
DustyStorm 16
Usually if it's a spider it's a great thing!!! And will have to agree with 12! LMAO
KaanTech 0
Use lighter + any flammable chemical sprayer That would be wiser. 2-3rd degree of burned hands + possible permanent blind because of explosion. These are the possible dangerous bonus conclusions but sure you would kill that bitch if you aim well enough. Use it with your own risk.
XtraEzeee 8
37- you forgot burned down kitchen, but it'll be worth it to take out that spider. >:|
KaanTech 0
No sacrifice no victory
awsome13 10
Bottle throwing is a sport in Russia.
YeahCourse 4
When it's a spider! ;)
TrentF13 12
Molitovs, my friend..... Molitovs..
jerseyboy732 16
or you could have hit it and it could have released a thousand of its offspring in your house
_ebbonyy 11
If OP thought it was 'wise' to try and hit itwith a bottle, then he/she probably deserves a million spider babies in the house :-p
xblair 11
Well I just hope the bottle is okay.
Pandacupcakelove 26
Ewww! They do that? D:
rocklare18 7
It's like the magic bullet theory
HotPotat0 8
Why would you throw a bottle to a spider? Like come on, how big is the chance of the bottle hitting the spider? Seriously, people these days..#facepalm
therealslim 15
#stophashtaggingonFML
jacobboothe 2
That counts for you too
misterjez 15
Anger management might be for you.
itssosparkly 21
"I thought it would be wise." You know it's a YDI when...
poopycat 5
Wow...
always_cool758 1
y wud anyone throw a bottle at a spider... ? Next time Pls use a swatter or even ur slipper ...
_ebbonyy 11
y wud u rite lyk dis?
yahoowizard 16
And now, it's training, getting stronger, ready for anything else you might throw at it. I guess whatever doesn't kill you does make you stronger, haha.
janerose21 3
lool
Scotttles23 2
I would probably have done the same thing...
FortuneCookie3 1
and now im crawling away laughing.
rattusrattus 19
I really hope you used a plastic bottle, but it's funnier to imagine you using a wine bottle or something. Next time: get a glass. Put glass over spider. Slide an old card under glass (and spider). Carry glass and card to window and release spider outdoors. Much cleaner than swatting the spider.
Dylman 6
Clearly must have been a plastic bottle, I highly doubt a wine or beer bottle could width stand a blow to the wall and bounce back
iceblue_fml 0
Withstand? Lol it did a fat stand?
Rhysviri 10
Impossible to do if the spider is over your head on a wall... I mean, unless you have sticky feet 'r something.