Today, while trying to kill a spider in my kitchen, I thought it would be wise to throw a bottle at it. The bottle hit the wall, bounced off the fridge and hit me in the face. The lucky spider crawled away, and is surely still laughing somewhere. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I saw a spider in my kitchen. Freaked, but trying to be humane, I held out a piece of paper so it would climb on, and I would then put it outside. However, it jumped out of nowhere and landed on my face. My reaction was to whack at where the spider was - my face. I stumbled around, disoriented; the spider got away. FML
Today, I found a big spider on my wall. I have arachnophobia, and I was trying to kill it with my shoe. I pulled back and hit myself in the face, causing me to fall backwards. The spider is still alive somewhere in my house. FML
Today, I saw a spider crawling across a poster in my bedroom, so I smacked the spot below it to scare the spider into climbing back up the wall. Instead, because the poster wasn't completely flat to the wall, I catapulted the spider straight into my face. FML
Today, I saw a spider in my room. I got a piece of paper to try and put it outside. As I reached, it jumped out of nowhere and landed on my face. My reaction was to smack where the spider was - my face. I fell on the floor disoriented. The spider got away. FML
Today, I was taking a shower when I noticed the huge spider above my head. Now, being the smart person I am, I sprayed the water up at it, causing it to fall. Right on my face. FML
Today, I tried to catch a spider in a glass. It was on the paper and I wanted it to fall into the glass, but I moved the paper the wrong way, screeched like a banshee and flung the glass at the floor. I was barefoot. FML
Today, I woke up to a spider crawling across my face. I was so shocked that my new house had spiders, I jumped up out of bed, only to slip on the floor and land face down onto the bed. Wouldn't you know it, right where the spider was at that point. I can still taste the juice I squished out of it. FML
Today, I saw what I thought was a spider. Wanting to kill it as quickly as possible, I smacked my hand against the wall with force. It was a nail. FML
Today, there was a huge spider on my ceiling, so I grabbed a shoe to deal with it. Just as I jumped up to smush it, my idiot brother flicked the light off. I missed the spider, but it didn't miss my face as the impact caused it to fall. FML
Today, I was laying on the couch, reading, when I noticed a spindly leg poking round the corner of my book. Upon realising it was a spider, I calmly and rationally threw my book across the room, breaking the TV. FML
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Top comments
Tsunami87 17
When is it ever wise to throw a bottle at a living thing?
itssosparkly 21
"I thought it would be wise." You know it's a YDI when...
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Comments (77)
tony1891 22
yeah I'm sure it is laughing right now. just as I am laughing at your post. =D. happy hunting
leadawg75 12
Lmao!
IdfkMyUsernamexC 5
Don't worry, it will come back for another laugh.
tj4234 36
I clicked YDI after you said you were trying to kill a spider. Seriously. Why kill it? What has it done to deserve being killed? If it bothered you that much you could have just put it outside.
baileylaidlaw 6
I kill every bug / spider I see. I hate spiders. I will kill em' when I see em.
dominic1221 6
26- Awww you're scared of a little spider? Don't have the balls to catch it and put it out, you're such a pansy that all you can do is put a boot on it? Awww. :)
Morden_fml 1
If I walk into my house and see a strange guy standing there and saying "Hey, I'm gonna spray some stuff from my posterior all over the place and maybe eat some bugs. As long as you keep cool about it then we're good. Otherwise, if you come near me or get too worked up about me crawling on top of you while you sleep, then I'll bite you. Might even poison you" then I'd probably stop on him for a while. Why treat a spider better than a person?
Ninjasaurus18 9
Why would you kill a spider in the first place?
Cintia07 7
You have a good throw for all of that to happen!
PenguinSwag47 0
When I read this I thought you threw a glass bottle. Then I realized glass bottles don't bounce.
iceblue_fml 0
Glass bottles bounce! My friend and I used to throw magnums and other bottles but a magnum is crazy strong. I've also seen a 40, thrown at point blank range, bounce off of a passenger window of a mustang. Neither broke.
krmc822 6
Haha priceless, can I ask what so wise about throwing a bottle at the wall?
I_Punch_Babies 7
the itsy bitsy spider dodged the bottle and laughed
memob123 0
Ffn