Today, while trying to kill a spider in my kitchen, I thought it would be wise to throw a bottle at it. The bottle hit the wall, bounced off the fridge and hit me in the face. The lucky spider crawled away, and is surely still laughing somewhere. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I saw a spider in my kitchen. Freaked, but trying to be humane, I held out a piece of paper so it would climb on, and I would then put it outside. However, it jumped out of nowhere and landed on my face. My reaction was to whack at where the spider was - my face. I stumbled around, disoriented; the spider got away. FML
Today, I found a big spider on my wall. I have arachnophobia, and I was trying to kill it with my shoe. I pulled back and hit myself in the face, causing me to fall backwards. The spider is still alive somewhere in my house. FML
Today, I saw a spider crawling across a poster in my bedroom, so I smacked the spot below it to scare the spider into climbing back up the wall. Instead, because the poster wasn't completely flat to the wall, I catapulted the spider straight into my face. FML
Today, I saw a spider in my room. I got a piece of paper to try and put it outside. As I reached, it jumped out of nowhere and landed on my face. My reaction was to smack where the spider was - my face. I fell on the floor disoriented. The spider got away. FML
Today, I was taking a shower when I noticed the huge spider above my head. Now, being the smart person I am, I sprayed the water up at it, causing it to fall. Right on my face. FML
Today, I tried to catch a spider in a glass. It was on the paper and I wanted it to fall into the glass, but I moved the paper the wrong way, screeched like a banshee and flung the glass at the floor. I was barefoot. FML
Today, I woke up to a spider crawling across my face. I was so shocked that my new house had spiders, I jumped up out of bed, only to slip on the floor and land face down onto the bed. Wouldn't you know it, right where the spider was at that point. I can still taste the juice I squished out of it. FML
Today, I saw what I thought was a spider. Wanting to kill it as quickly as possible, I smacked my hand against the wall with force. It was a nail. FML
Today, there was a huge spider on my ceiling, so I grabbed a shoe to deal with it. Just as I jumped up to smush it, my idiot brother flicked the light off. I missed the spider, but it didn't miss my face as the impact caused it to fall. FML
Today, I was laying on the couch, reading, when I noticed a spindly leg poking round the corner of my book. Upon realising it was a spider, I calmly and rationally threw my book across the room, breaking the TV. FML
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Top comments
Tsunami87 17
When is it ever wise to throw a bottle at a living thing?
itssosparkly 21
"I thought it would be wise." You know it's a YDI when...
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Comments (77)
mintcar 10
It'll be back, this time with an army. Prepare yourself.
soldiat_fml 17
It didn't bounce off the fridge. The spider used telekinesis and threw it back at your face.
Lisianthus 13
That poor bottle! Getting tossed around like that. If everyone could pause for a moment and think about all the abuse that happens to these bottles. I for one am against bottle abuse. #Stop Bottle Abuse 2012 Support my cause! Lets keep this world safe visit: StopBottleAbuse2012.com for more info on how YOU can make a difference.
bubo_fml 11
Are you out of your mind? Didn't you see "Arachnophobia?" Those lil' fukkas will hunt U down!
KiddNYC1O 22
Invest in a dart blowing thingy.
hateevryone 15
It'll be back
marinefootball88 1
I would leave the house if I were you! I have a big fear of spiders (elevated heart rate,chest tightens when i see one) I play out a scenario in my head, if I were locked in a room with a giant spider with a pistol and one shot what would I do? Should this situation ever arise haha I would take the shot at the spider and If I missed, I would start pistol whipping myself in the back of the head lmao. It sucks and I don't understand where/how I get freaked out by them, and letting your friends at college know about it....HORRID idea.
johngaltmovement 8
Now you know how the spider feels...
Neligee 9
Hahahah ! I deal with a similar issue but instead with huge roaches :| ... No matter how many poison traps i buy or how well I keep the house clean, the roaches walk around freely .
Zachthejoker 10
Or you could've done the normal thing and squished it with your foot