Today, while packing my luggage from vacation I thought I saw a penny drop into my bag. After looking everywhere I couldn't find it. Now that I am home I found out that I had mistaken a cockroach for a penny. I now have a family of cockroaches living in my luggage. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was taking a final exam and I reached into my pocket to get out a pencil. I felt this thing in my pocket so I got it out and put it on the desk. At first I thought it was a leaf but then it started kicking and trying to run around. It was a cockroach. It had been living in my pocket. FML
Today, I found a New Year's surprise: a cockroach in my kitchen drawers. FML
Today, I was expecting lizards, spiders, and weird local insects in my hotel room. What I got was a cockroach on my toothbrush. A very tiny cockroach. FML
Today, I put my house shoes on without socks, but felt a rock in them. I shook it free and out dropped a half-crushed roach. FML
Today, as I was driving, a massive cockroach clicked its way across my windshield. I pulled over to fling it out the window, but it spread its wings and flew around like a hook-armed stabbing machine. I lost it in the dark car and now I can't find it. It's going to be a long drive home. FML
Today, I found out that the small bugs I've been blowing off my pillow all year are in fact baby cockroaches. I discover this when I found two full grown ones crawling around and decided to Google it. FML
Today, I found a roach in my takeaway. I found it after I felt something hard in my mouth and spat pieces of it back out onto my plate. FML
Today, I woke up with a cockroach in my ear. FML
Today, I bought a Santa hat. After wearing the hat for a few hours, I noticed a strange lump near the tip of it. I stuck my hand inside to dig out the mysterious object. It was a dead cockroach. FML
Today, my apartment was flooded due to a broken pipe, which caused a huge family of cockroaches to disperse. Did you know they can fly? FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
demonkonga 5
1 Spray it with pesticide 2 burn that shit and laugh like a maniac 3 throw it away and buy a new one
SliceOfCake 9
Why were you searching that much for a penny, anyway?
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (124)
obsydian_fml 3
Vacuum then up then vacuum some roach spray for reassurance that they won't crawl out! Then spray down your bags in case of eggs
abbasgirl 3
No! Don't do that OP! You'll just end up with eggs hatching inside your vacuum cleaner. Wash everything that was in the suitcase. You need to be really careful with that stuff - everything, including hairdryers, etc. should be considered a possible hiding place. If you don't want to throw the suitcase away, leave it outside for a couple of weeks. You can spray it, but you should also sprinkle borax inside because spraying will only kill the adults but won't help with the eggs.
bubo_fml 11
"La Cu-car-acha, La Cu-car-acha..."
Calyx_fml 22
It's a family vacation.
beastroish 0
Oh my God?! That's disgusting!! That would REALLY creep me out!
DiruKitty18 8
I feel bad for you! I would have shit my pants. Just make sure there weren't others and none got out!
RedHotMom26 3
Looks like someone needs glasses.
DonutDude 0
These fmls don't even sound realistic anymore...
abbasgirl 3
This one is unfortunately quite possible.
nadnerbz 6
It's only a penny, it's not like you lost a child
rulingtomax 0
Toss it OP or give it to a neighbor
TheBonzaiGirl 0
If cockroaches can surive direct nuke attacts, I'm pretty sure fire and pesticides won't phase them ;)