Today, while I was walking downtown a homeless person asked me for a dollar. I thought it would be funny to wave the dollar in his face and taunt him. I guess he thought it would be funny to stab me in the leg with a pencil. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, I was at the park when I saw a homeless man sleeping on a bench. I thought it would be funny to throw a small rock at him. He thought it would be funny to pull out his knife and chase me for six blocks. FML
Today, I saw a homeless man on the street and decided to give him the dollar bill I had left in my wallet. He said "Thank you" then as I turned to walk away, he muttered "Cheap-ass cunt". FML
Today, I was walking down the street, when a man behind me tapped me on the shoulder. He gave a $5 bill and said that he thought I had dropped it. Not having the integrity to turn him down, I took it. I spent the next 20 minutes being chased by a crazy hobo who claimed that it was his. FML
Today, trying to do a good deed, I gave a homeless guy a $10 bill. As I walked away, he yelled after me, "You fucking bitch!" FML
Today, while walking down the street, a homeless man walked up to me. He opened his mouth to say something and I immediately said that I didn't have any spare change because I was late for work. He then said "I was gonna ask you for the time, dickwad". Apparently he wasn't homeless. FML
Crossed purposes
Today, while I was walking home, a homeless man saw me and didn't ask for change, but how much I charged. FML
Today, some guy on the street threatened to stab me. I called his bluff, and walked away. He wasn't bluffing. FML
Leave me alone
Today, I passed a homeless person asking for change. When I politely apologized and told him that I had none, he yelled angrily, "Who comes to this city without money?" I replied, "Apparently, you do." Wrong answer. He followed me, now screaming. FML
Grab it while you can
Today, I was walking through a rich part of the city and saw 2 dollars on the ground. I didn't pick it so people wouldn't think I was poor. FML
Today, I was sitting in the park eating a sandwich, when a homeless guy asked me for some spare change. I said I didn't have any. He offered an "erotic striptease" in exchange for my sandwich. I said no. He gave one anyway. I walked back to work on an empty stomach. FML
Top comments
beerab 0
That's just MEAN on your part.
mardigrasqueen 0
You are a pompous bastard. You deserved a knife, not a pencil.
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Comments (813)
Shazam25 7
I'd have done the same thing in that homeless person's shoes (or lack thereof).
wowthatissad 9
Too bad he didn't have a gun
Funnyguyproblems 1
Inconsiderate asshole.
imaboss177 5
Who the **** does that
Raptorix2012 17
i remember a story my english teacher told us where she stabbed an annoying kid in the leg with a pencil when she was 12. She got a lucky break when he got called outside for a talk. He walks with a limp now and is surprisingly still friends with her.
L2U7A_E5I9A2E8H 20
Congrats to the person who actually read enough comments to get to this one. Oh and OP way to be an asshole!
500028501fml 0
When would it ever be okay to do that?
electric_rider20 4
**** face. I wish you woulda gotten stabbed in the dick. It would be a shame if you were older than me. I went to New York City and gave a homeless man a dollar. Didn't know if he was faking it or not. Either way I felt good about it. I'm 15. I almost pity you. But then I remembered oh yeah...you don't need to be pitied.
benfagan 5
I hate how some people treat homeless like trash
ScarletRoses92 22
What kind if Canadian are you?!?