Today, while I was on the bus to work, a morbidly obese man sat down next to me. When my stop came and I stood up to get off, he just looked at me, said with a smirk, "good luck with that," and went back to reading his paper. I missed my stop. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, I was riding the public bus and a really fat, smelly guy sat next to me. He put his arm around my shoulder and asked me if I was single. My stop wasn't for three more miles. FML
Today, on the bus, a large smelly man was sat next to me, pushing me against the divider and sliding into me on every turn. When he got up for his stop, his pants had loosened and his bare ass was staring me in the face. FML
Today, a pregnant woman got on the bus. There were no free seats, so I stood up to give her mine. An obese man pushed past her, waddled over, and oozed into my seat. I said it was for the pregnant lady. He called me a "sexist bitch" and claimed he needed it more. FML
Today, I was on the London underground reading a newspaper. A huge guy was sitting next to me and there weren't many other people around. As I turned a page, he leaned into me, glaring, and said, "I'm not finished yet". At the next stop I put down the paper and jumped off. It wasn't even my stop. FML
Today, a total stranger on the bus called me hideous and threw a soda in my face. I only asked him if the seat next to him was taken. FML
Today, while on the bus, I found out the seat I'd taken was the preferred spot of a very hostile and extremely overweight freshman. Instead of letting me find different place to sit, she half sat on me, and completely ignored my attempts to dislodge myself all the way to school. FML
Broke
Today, while sitting in a handicapped seat on the bus, an old man angrily approached me and chewed me out in front of everyone for not leaving the seat empty for "those who actually need it." Then he stormed off the bus, stepping heavily on my broken foot. FML
Today, I was sitting on the bus and as I'm quite short my legs were dangling. Some guy, who wasn't looking where he was going, tripped over my foot and went flying. He and everyone else on the bus glared at me like it was deliberate. The man next to me even changed seats in disgust. FML
Today, a really cute guy sat across from me on the bus. He smiled at me, then tensed his muscles and lifted a heavy bag with one arm. Thinking he was trying to act "macho" to impress me, I rolled my eyes and threw him an annoyed/disgusted look. When he got off, I realized he only had one arm. FML
Pervy
Today, I got on a bus that was so overcrowded I had to stand next to the driver with nothing to hang on to. A drunk man got on and for the rest of the half hour journey continuously fell on me. When I got off, he smiled and told me as the doors were closing, "The last twelve times was for fun." FML
Top comments
Maddidaddi 0
I would have hit him.
footballfreak65 6
You should have yelled " oh look they are giving free hotdogs outside"
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (226)
NickKuiper 8
Lol, I can imagine trying to explain to your boss why you were late... "I swear, it was the fat guy's fault!"
jtown117 8
i would be like bitch please and punch him in the balls if his fat isnt hiding them and say good luck having children
coried91 28
If he is morbidly obese he already terminated the possibility of having kids.
xIBleedPurplex16 0
Should of been like hey look we past your stop...McDonald's.
efrainelboricua 12
Fat bastard :D
THE_A_TEEN 28
That ain't funny. I haven't seen my Willie in over 2 years. That's enough for it to be legally dead.
JamesOnToast 5
Tell him 'good luck finding your toes'.
SydMadrid 0
You should've told him to go eat some more twinkies
katcot99 11
I would have said- "at least I have something to look forward to when I finally get home."
PYLrulz 17
Fat Bastard: *troll face* U mad?
Narttu 20
Fat ****. If that happened to me I would honestly climb over the person, making it as uncomfortable for them as I possibly could.
Brelywi 15
Shoulda just climbed over him.