Today, while on the bus, I found out the seat I'd taken was the preferred spot of a very hostile and extremely overweight freshman. Instead of letting me find different place to sit, she half sat on me, and completely ignored my attempts to dislodge myself all the way to school. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I got on the bus. Before I could make it to a free seat, the driver hit the gas, and the sudden movement caused me to stumble and accidentally grab onto another passenger for support. She didn't appreciate this, accused me of molesting her, and got me thrown back off. FML
Today, I had to spend a long bus ride with my chest pressed against the window, because some mammoth of a woman decided to squeeze her double wide ass into my seat. FML
Today, I found out that when you are sitting on a full bench at a bus stop, some crazy person will come sit on you. FML
Today, I was riding the bus home from school. I was sitting by myself, and my backpack was occupying the seat next to me. A hot girl boarded the bus, and was standing right where I was sitting. I placed my backpack on my lap, freeing up the seat. The girl stood the entire bus ride. FML
Today, I was riding the bus home from college. I was standing in the aisle and there was a rather cute girl sitting next to me. The bus came to an abrupt stop, I tripped, and fell into her lap. She shrieked, "Eww! Get off me!" and shove me onto the floor of the bus. Nice to know I'm revolting. FML
Today, while sitting in a handicapped seat on the bus, an old man angrily approached me and chewed me out in front of everyone for not leaving the seat empty for "those who actually need it." Then he stormed off the bus, stepping heavily on my broken foot. FML
Today, a total stranger on the bus called me hideous and threw a soda in my face. I only asked him if the seat next to him was taken. FML
Today, a sweet old lady gave up her seat for me in the bus. She lectured the entire bus that seats should be given to those in need, like myself who is "heavily pregnant." I'm just fat. FML
Today, a pretty girl joined the line at the bus station. I let her skip the line and go before me so I could sit next to her. After she bought her ticket, I realized there were no more seats left on that bus. I was told to get off, and had to take the next bus, sitting next to a snoring old man. FML
Today, while on a crowded public bus, a cute girl asked if she could sit next to me. Problem is, I didn't hear correctly and thought she asked if anyone was sitting next to me. I answered no, causing her to walk off angrily and earning me several disgusted stares from other passengers. FML
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Top comments
flockz 20
18- at first i thought you were describing how to finger someone....
TeeHee124 0
Did you have a boner?
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Comments (200)
TeeHee124 0
Did you have a boner?
SirObvious 1
Bubba don't like you
EvilPotato 15
Did you have an ******.
TeeHee124 0
Well they would have to have a boner to ******, hence my question
DigitalFusion 4
Replying to number one so this is near the top so op can find it if so inclined. Next time straighten your hand out and drive it fingers first inward and downward just above hip bone. There's an excellent nerve cluster there. That's for next time. For this time report the assault to the police, and gather any potential witnesses you can. Don't be afraid to report things like this, assholes deserve any criminal charges their actions warrant.
Jdimp 1
did you stroke?
TeeHee124 0
UH 18... What?
flockz 20
18- at first i thought you were describing how to finger someone....
TeeHee124 0
Yeah that's what it seemed like at first
TeeHee124 0
Am I the only one confused here?!
LiveLaughFML 10
FE-FI-FO-FUM I SMELL THE BLOOD OF A FRESHMAN
Keyman1212 14
No Kay, obviously 18 was explaining how to sexually violate the beached whale. Gosh...
zendaddy0 0
Well just punch the fat ****** in the face
fighterboy11 7
Kay stop acting like a condescending brat, and learn how to spell. People make mistakes, and he has been chastised enough. You twat.
TeeHee124 0
What does this have to do with me asking if they had a boner?
Keyman1212 14
75- Kay can literally ruin your life. Be careful youngin'...
KiddNYC1O 22
78- Filthy, scumbag threadjackers.
fakeaccountX 6
Be assertive! Not IN-sertive....!
KiddNYC1O 22
LOL. I thought MelissaBritt deleted her account because I called her out numerous times for threadjacking.
kickblocker 18
wha....where did you get that from?
KiddNYC1O 22
Yes, Kay, I see your point. You ripped him a new butthole.
Bravo11 14
I can't find my nerve cluster.../:
powershot_fml 5
lap dancing?
EvilPotato 15
75 be careful who you mouth off to, you must have bigger balls than a elephant if you dare talk to Kay like that, she's bigger than Jesus.
fighterboy11 7
Yeah, you are right. Because since some 30 year old loser can "wreck" my life. LOL what is he going to come to my house? Yeah so after he mans up and admits my previous comment was grammatical and spelling-wise correct and he can't even make a good argument. Bro ur a ten yo brat. Btw how was my grammar and spelling in this comment? O and anyone who likes kay pliz feel free to thumb me down ACTUALLY DO thumb me down! Man do I love grammar :p
spicerack1528 3
Bigger than Oprah?
EvilPotato 15
109 even bigger.
No_LoveMM 3
75 don't feed the troll
ThreeSheetsGone 12
18- There are a number of way more effective pressure points on the human body. Off the top of my head, I can think of six. 1. Behind the ear 2. Under the jaw 3. Inside the elbow, on top of the humerus 4. Between the collarbones (push down on top of the breast plate with one finger) 5. The muscle between the thumb and forefinger 6. Underside of the knee, between ligaments
cbdee 8
18 sucks!
jefffluffingham 5
18: its not assault, and charging that is discrimination against overweight people. attacking nerve clusters is assault.
The__Redneck 7
Nonsense. You sit on someone, you deserve to get hurt. In fact, the latter part of this is a YDI for the simple reason that OP didn't just shove the rude idiot off onto the floor.
TeeHee124 0
I am literally crying from laughing that me asking about boners has come to this
Choose_Wisely 5
91 - fail
Phyre24 17
Dude, I hear ya. I REALLY wanted to know the answer to your question, but it seems that it just wasn't meant to be. Oh cruel world, what have we come to?! XD
Yellow_Fish79 11
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
What a bitch. The first chance you got to get up you should throw yourself on her lap and call her fatass. :)
KennyMcCrmick322 0
Throw himself onto her lap......... :3
Alexisthebestest 16
You sound like the bitch here.
bitchslapped22 14
That's bullying.
Ashelizabethh 8
Right because parking your fat ass on top of someone because you've decided that's your seat isn't bullying at all.
mondayna 3
That's cold man.
Yellow_Fish79 11
Cry more. Fat people don't have souls. :)
E_ve 9
That's cruel. Yeah, she was a bitch about 'her' seat and she shouldn't have sat on him but that doesn't mean she should be submitted to bullying. And you said fat people have no souls? The fact that you said that makes me think there are two options: Option A) You're overweight yourself and you take out your frustrations and low self-esteem on other people with weight-issues or... Option B) You're a brat who's been skinny your entire life and probably bullied fat people so you didn't have to feel like the useless scumbag you really are. Am I right? Or are you just stupid?
wishfulmidget 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
poke her with a pen or something. or scream rape thatll get her off...YDI for being wimpy
DigitalFusion 4
Because the actions you suggested aren't wimpy?
flockz 20
ya we all know that poking with a pen is wimpy. i suggest something larger like a log next time.
KennyMcCrmick322 0
I think ur misunderstanding. He wasn't bein a wuss, he was bien suffocated
Alexisthebestest 16
That's your solution? Poke someone with a pen and yell rape? That's no way to be assertive....wimp.
hailphire130 0
Flockz, you bastard! Where have you been?
EvilPotato 15
127 in your closet.
hailphire130 0
134-So that's why I keep finding droppings and empty pringles cans in there.
Glitterhinoceros 14
That sounds extremely uncomfortable >.>
devilboy1234 0
I agree it must suck haha
MagicallyFat 12
Just give the bitch a waffle. Bitches LOVE waffles
ImOlivia 5
No, we love cookies. (From another FML)
instnt1nfction 17
Why can't 4 sit on me.
hailphire130 0
I don't know, 172. But I think that you can answer your own question.
cls139 0
Trust me it is i had that happen to mr
AllThatHit 7
extremely
ckr911 5
Aww, don't be mean to the fat kids. They're people too! Except they are 2 people instead of 1 -_-
ckr911 5
Mean**
TeeHee124 0
You? Yup
ckr911 5
I like how you thumb me down, but thumbed yourself up, like you are liked. -two can play at that game!-
TeeHee124 0
Congrats you're the only person that liked your comments...
flockz 20
ya fat people are people too. they go to the gym just like you and me... and i stand next to them to make myself look like a 10.
anencephalic 14
Wouldn't that mean you have to twice as nice to fatties?
champjb 0
Time to slap a bitch
meatbunss 1
Hell yeah. Don't let a freshman do that to you.
swimchica22 0
Tell her to take her fatass to mcdonalds for a double cheeseburger!
Kueezy 6
5 fat people was offended by your comment :D
StoryOfTheYear 15
Were*
KiddNYC1O 22
77- Must you put a pic of YOUR boner?
taty7659 4
Ahahahaaaaa :)
THE_A_TEEN 28
Why a double cheseburger? Are you talking about IN-N-OUT? It's BIG MACS and ANGUS BURGERS. Wait forget the angus, just give her the big macs.
KiddNYC1O 22
123- McDonald's has double cheeseburgers..........
flockz 20
hey 77- your clothes seem to have fallen off.
rakusu_klein 24
You must've felt like a pancake! Maybe that's why she didn't move...
JinxosGirl87 0
Wave a sandwich in front of her face and then throw it across the bus for her to fetch.
woody768 0
Not fetch. That implies that she comes back.
steadycreepin 5
Well then...
shinychic_96 7
Great pic!