Today, while I was in the bathroom my mom walked in and tried to have a conversation with me about my bowel movements. I'm 23, and this is a regular thing. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my mother tried to have a conversation with me. While she was taking a piss. With the bathroom door wide open. FML
Today, I was taking a shower. My mom thinks it's ok to just walk in on someone when they are in there so she decides to take a crap. The worst part is she thought it would be less awkward to talk to me. FML
Today, my mom decided to infodump on me as I came home needing to take a shit. She wouldn't stop talking and calling me back when I tried to walk off. I couldn't get a word in, and she was ignoring my gestures. She's now calling me disrespectful because I finally ran off and dropped a loud one in the toilet. FML
Today, I went shopping with my mother. I needed to use the toilet, so entered a restaurant. After I left the toilet, my mother, who was near the restaurant's entrance, called out and asked, "Did you flush it?" Everyone heard her. And I'm 22 years old. FML
Today, my mom yelled at me for not pooping with the bathroom door open like the rest of the family. FML
Today, my mother made me see the doctor to see if I had irritable bowel syndrome, on the account of how often I go to the restroom. I then had to admit I only go in there to get away from my family. My doctor thought it was hilarious. My mom didn't. FML
Today, I thought I could stay on the phone and go to the bathroom without him noticing. My mom knocks on the door and without even thinking, I yelled "I'M ON THE TOILET!" He said "ew.." FML
Today, my stomach started to hurt. When I got home, my parents had company over, which I had to rush past to use the bathroom. After being in the bathroom for about 3 minutes, my mother yells to me from the other room, in front of the guests, "Are you OK in there?" I'm 27. FML
Today, I went to the doctor for horrible stomach pains. He said I had an abnormal amount of stool in me, and that I'd need to flush it out. I called my mom and told her what happened, to which she responded, "I always knew you were full of shit, I didn't need a doctor to tell me that." FML
Today, my mom screamed my name five times while I was on the toilet. When I was done, I went to her and she said, “Why the FUCK did you not immediately drop what you were doing and rush to help me with the dishes?” Apparently, the fact that I was pooping wasn’t a good enough excuse. FML
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Top comments
Nightwing98 22
Time to invest in a lock.
BB_Skylar 22
Seriously? Dude, move out. You know it's time when you have no privacy. Maybe, she's trying to drive you out. Take a hint!
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Comments (63)
erptwerp 26
It's a REGULAR thing. Hahaha good on the fiber!
Goblin182 27
Seemed like the right time. Certainly the right place.
revolvearoundme 15
I don't think she's in there to discuss your bowel movements. I think she's checking to see if your balls have dropped yet. You're 23 and can't confront someone about something like this. It's your mom. Unless you really really really blow this conversation worst you should have to deal with is some moodiness and an acceptance of your boundaries. You probably should have dealt with this 10+ years ago, if you want it to stop you have do something about it.
doodlebug13 15
Ok seriously what's the problem? Besides the convo was about bowl movements (ew). I talk to my mom and mother in law and sister in law when they are in the bathroom. Unless you're a guy. Then lock the door
tamilyn_tammi 14
You should tell her to quitting butting in to talk about shit. XD
Starham1 14
Lock the door.
momac86 17
Move out but a lock or don't poop in her house ... Things a 23 year old shouldn't have to be told
kris107k 0
A regular thing should be a lock on your bathroom door!
WildChildRocker 11
At least they're regular.
GeorgiaBea 28
Is she a nurse? I talk about poop almost everyday at my job- and my staff does personal care,showers, teeth brushing, toileting ect... Not everyone is squeamish or whatever about it.