Today, while grocery shopping, my Dad asked me what I wanted for 'Din-Dins' while scratching his nuts. In a crowded aisle. Wearing short shorts. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, while shopping, my dad asked me to walk further away from him, saying I was cramping his style in front of all the chicks there. FML
Today, my dad and I were at the grocery store buying toilet paper. As we walk out I see these two attractive guys that I know. My dad gets that I think they're cute, so he shouts "Hey babe, how's your stomach feeling now? Will this be enough for you?" They walk away laughing. FML
Today, I was with my dad at the supermarket and this guy was checking me out. My dad yells at him with a grin, "I know! I make beautiful babies!" FML
The difference
Today, I was shopping for socks and I went to look in the men's section. Dad said, "You don't want those, they're for men." I asked what the difference was. He looked around, and then leaned in and whispered, "Men have a penis." FML
Today, I took my dad out shopping. I managed to pull into a really cramped parking spot and said, "Man, that was a tight squeeze." My dad then looked me in the eyes and said, "So was your mom." FML
Look!
Today, my mom and I went to the mall to look for some boxer briefs. While looking, I saw two girls I knew from school, so I went over to say hello. At least, that was my plan, but my mom screamed, "Look! These have dinosaurs on them!" They left the store giggling. FML
Today, my mom told my dad to get me extra absorbent pads, very loudly, in a crowded mall. FML
Buy your own then!
Today, I asked my mom to buy me new shorts. She bought fluffy bubble shorts. I'm a 20 year-old guy. FML
Today, my dad had a midlife crisis in the grocery store over his football career in high school. So he decided pelting me with vegetables and fruits would be a good idea. FML
Today, when I bent down to get something off a low shelf at the grocery store, I felt my shorts split wide open at the butt. All my husband did was make jokes about "that's not how you do the splits." FML
Top comments
Toggybbz 0
Your dad is my new favourite person. he wears short shorts in public and uses the phrase 'din-dins' <3
spidersilkx9 0
tell your dad to call me [sarcasm]
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (178)
spidersilkx9 0
tell your dad to call me [sarcasm]
paid2think 0
Australian dad :ppp
ggooo3 0
officer dangle
LOLatU87 0
lol dangle Aussie dad, I bet they were stubbies. my old man still wears those "cringe"
rebbee 0
They are not as bad as speedos. ehhhhh.....my dad still wears those even though my family tell him that nobody wants to see his junk. He sometimes mows the lawn in them. Vomit!!!!
LOLatU87 0
you should FML that lol
rebbee 0
I submit crap all the time and they never get published. They're good too! :-)
BoyFromTheFuture 0
yeah my dad used to wear around his old training shorts from the 70s and 80s which were really high too. It's embarrassing now but it will be a funny memory later.
djsquintz 0
good thing you told us it was sarcasm. we would have never picked up on it if you hadn't. we would have totally thought you really wanted him to look up your phone number and call you! LOL! you crafty devil you.
steelersjackson 0
I wish my dad did that lol
DudeImBetter 0
omg fyl why the heck would your dad ever say din dins
banananut 0
i don't think him saying din dins is the embaressing part in this fml.
KingDingALing 9
Hahahahahaha, your dad is gay, OP! :p
christa953 12
that's hilarious
Themistocles_fml 0
Shut up fool. You were swimming inside those balls at some point.
Themistocles_fml 0
Shut up fool. You were swimming inside those balls not long ago from now.
rallets 23
who wears short shorts?
Alexitis1 3
I wear short shorts haha :P
KBruce317 0
OP's dad wears short shorts!! woop woop!
rallets 23
:D
megamatt215 0
16- lol Reno 911 reference.
rfngxhhshi 0
64=win
psyco5000 0
what's ur #? I'll call u!
bludangl 0
can I call you?
PieInTheSky24 0
sounds hot
mayhem372 8
haha! funny
kiwiwirox 0
wtf is din dins???
tpea 1
LOL I love how he's wearing short shorts.
Abbie_luv 0
xD perv ^-^
BoyFromTheFuture 0
I love how he scratching his nuts.
Abbie_luv 0
O.o
Abbie_luv 0
xD perv ^-^
keenjellybean 0
and the Australian bogan lives on...
SpaceMannn 0
short shorts? seriously I wouldn't have gone with him if he was wearing short shorts. what is wrong with you ha..
parte_perdiz 0
agreed. short shorts are not good.
lblikk 0
hahha your dad sounds cool
SAMHAlN 0
her dad sounds fake. unless they're at walmart in alabama
LiesAreBeautiful 0
@151: You are completely retarded. People are always making jokes of how stupid people are in Alabama, and how classless and country. The ones who truly have no class or intelligence are the ones stereotyping a whole population of almost five million based on the actions of very few. All states have those few stupid ones, too. So how about you leave Alabama alone and go make some racist jokes or something? It's basically the same thing. :P
TeenieAmerica 9
His dad's not gay. He's just a bogan. Duh.
threer 30
#153, are you from Alabama?
JazzieeMamass 0
SMH , iwould cry if my dad did that -_- (not literally)
Toggybbz 0
Your dad is my new favourite person. he wears short shorts in public and uses the phrase 'din-dins' <3
babeeee13 0
favorite*
BeeHappy_fml 0
you're an idiot, that is the british spelling of favorite.
MissErikaHart 0
I hate when people correct people. it's not cute and no1 freaking cares.
ktbird 0
Especially when they didn't spell anything wrong in the first place... just a regional difference.
happykate120 0
he sounds like a real classy guy :P
UrNotFunny 0
he spelled it correctly, "favourite" is just the British spelling of the word. just like how "color" is spelled as "colour" in Britain.
rlerke 0
hah! shoulda said you wanted tater totts.
vballgirl811 0
You're my new best friendddd(: Made my day(:
LOLatU87 0
"Who likes short shorts?"
zah_ali 3
lol! just what I was thinking :)
nekkid_dude 0
I love them. I grew up in the 70s-80s when shorts were short. I hate today's "shorts" that are halfway down your shin. I like my shorts halfway between my hip and my knee... where they should be.
pancakerocks 1
ur gay
jrezo757 0
well it's 2010 not 1970 get with the fuxking times
pancakerocks 1
not u 9 . 18 is gay
LOLatU87 0
Errr Thanks for all that information on you preference on short length, but I wascrefering to that song the correct response would of been " I like short shorts"
nekkid_dude 0
pancakerocks : I can see I have been out-witted by your superior intellect with your comment of "You're Gay".
pischrena 1
eff yeah you did.
perdix 31
I'm with you, nekkid_dude. I hate today's capri pants they laughingly call "shorts." I can't wait until short shorts come back in style -- I have great legs and I can use all the help I can get! If face bags become stylish at the same time, I gonna be a playah! What I think #9 LOLatU87 was referring to was: "We wear short shorts. If you dare wear short shorts Nair for short shots..."
oarisimo 4
I honestly don't see short shorts for guys ever coming back in style (thank god) and I work in fashion marketing and know all the little "trends" ahead time. just like platform shoes for guys, probably never coming back. guys should stick to knee length shorts anyway unless they're flaming or a stripper in my opinion....
moogzorz 0
we like shoit shoits
RedPillSucks 33
What!!?? Platform shoes are not coming back in style??? I just got me some lady ga ga platform shoes and some high heel sneakers... What will I do now??
perdix 31
Don't panic, RPS, oarisimo is a youngster and doesn't have the perspective an old dude like me has. We'd have never thought that old lady names like Sophie and Sadie and Emma would come back, nor clunky boots for girls that look like the orthopedic monstrosities my great-grandma Sadie wore. But, guess what? They are back! Hell, if I knew "Don't Stop Believin'" was coming back, I'd have joined a primitive Amazon tribe. Keep the shoes and be patient. I've got my scissors ready and I'm waiting for the word about the return of short shorts -- I'll have my cut-off jeans that will distract the ladies' attention to my fabulous legs and from my hideous face.
sockmybop 2
"Who wears short shorts? I!. wear short shorts!" - Joe Swanson :)
OwenMcAwesome 0
This needed to be done "I LIKE SHORT SHORTS" I'm just amazed it took so long :/
babeeee13 0
wowww,shouldn't have gone with him. the mans wearing short shorts. why would you go with him.?!
GrEaT_BaMbInO 0
o.p. might not have had a choice
sjoe789 0
WHAT DOES OP MEAN
sjoe789 0
WHAT DOES OP MEAN
emo_devon 11
it stands for the "Orgasmic Pimps" ^^
threer 30
#161, it means orgasmic pimps.
FYOL 0
could've been worse... could've been jorts
zah_ali 3
Or a mankini! lol!
zerobahamut03 2
lol! too funny xD
SMJ210 0
what are jorts?
MissErikaHart 0
Jean shorts? idk what r jorts?