Today, while eating with my kids at McDonalds, my son put his hand up and wanted me to give him a "high five." I went to give him a five, but he moved his hand at the last second and I ended up slapping him in the face. Now everyone there thinks I'm a child-beater. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I tried to high-five someone but somehow ended up slapping them in the face. FML
Today, my 2-year-old son put his hand on my face, gave me a sweet kiss, and put his cheek against mine. Then he slapped me hard enough to leave a mark, laughed, and scrambled away. FML
Today, two days after losing my temper with my smart mouthed 7 year-old son and slapping him across the face, I tried to apologize by buying him a treat and telling him if anyone found out, I would get in trouble. Today, I got a call from social services about the "bruise" on his face. FML
Today, I went to go give my boss a high five for a job well done. I missed his hand and accidentally slapped his ass on the way down. FML
Today while at my job as a store clerk, I walked by a family. I smiled at their little boy, who responded by flipping me off. As I was walking away, I looked back in time to catch his dad give him a high-five. FML
Today, a waiter came up and and put out his hand so I gave him a high five and pounded it. He then says, "Um, that was a nice high five but I wanted your plate." FML
Today, I was working the register at a local grocery store. A kid about 5 years old was having trouble zipping his jacket. I reached out to help him and he started screaming "No bad touch bad touch!" and kicked me in the knee. Everyone looked. FML
Today, I was at the mall with my little brother. I saw him touching some expensive objects, so I slapped his arm. I noticed he wasn't my brother when he started crying and his real mom slapped me in the face. FML
Today, as usual, I worked at McDonald's. Although I tried to diffuse the situation, an old man was absolutely furious, and punched me in the face over BBQ sauce. FML
Today, while shopping, my six-year-old son threw a tantrum because I wouldn't buy him a video game. I ended up having to grab his arm and leave the store. He screamed that I was kidnapping him, at which point I was socked in the face and pinned to the floor by three bystanders. FML
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Top comments
OmniFML 0
FALCON PUNCH!
Aelaena 6
You should have followed it up by saying 'chew with your mouth closed! what have i taught you?!'
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Comments (171)
BussellRishop 0
How hard were you going in for this high five!?!?
whatev5297 0
i clicked you deserve it because i think this is so stupid and made up. get a life
rp3k99 0
rofl @ # 2
ozymandias_fml 0
Taking them to McDonalds is child abuse enough, now you feel the need to slap them in the face?
L0veh8te 0
rofl, He wont be high fiving you any time soon.
Lambshanks 0
Since when is slapping a child in the face child-beating? That would be like a massage for me. When I was younger, if i misbehaved my mother would throw plates at my head. And don't even get me started on my father, let's just say he was an amateur boxer. White parents are so lax
cygnus12345 0
LOL
Indiana_fml 4
#35 When you say "Most parents", do you speak about your own parents or about the parents of your friends? Because a statement about either of them would be a far more reliable one than a statement about the OP. You have no reason to believe that the OP shares the fails which are common among the parents in your social network. #47 Since ten or twenty years or so. It's a question of your socioeconomic status, though...
Jimboom 12
#49 No. For one fact McDonalds wasn't introduced to South Africa til I was late in my teens. In my area at least. We were lucky if we got to go to Wimpy (probably the closest comparison I can give, except their burgers are good) for our birthdays. And by most parents I'm talking about the multiple of familys I see in MacDonalds/KFC/etc.. While not all of them are guilty of the aforementioned crimes of not feeding their kids correctly I think you will find that a lot of them do to go McDonalds at least twice a week, because their kids scream down the house if they don't get their "treats" as you call them. You may say this is not the case but I have seen this time and time again with my own eyes.
vcjesusfreak 0
To every person saying YDI for taking your kid to McDonalds, it's not like heeate there every day. There is nothing wrong with eating McDonalds once in a while. I work there (not because I can't get another job, because I am in highschool and I am saving up for college) so I eat McDonalds a lot more than many people, even overweight ones do, and I am skinny. So bringing your kid to McDonalds will not make him fat.