Today, while eating with my kids at McDonalds, my son put his hand up and wanted me to give him a "high five." I went to give him a five, but he moved his hand at the last second and I ended up slapping him in the face. Now everyone there thinks I'm a child-beater. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I tried to high-five someone but somehow ended up slapping them in the face. FML
Today, my 2-year-old son put his hand on my face, gave me a sweet kiss, and put his cheek against mine. Then he slapped me hard enough to leave a mark, laughed, and scrambled away. FML
Today, two days after losing my temper with my smart mouthed 7 year-old son and slapping him across the face, I tried to apologize by buying him a treat and telling him if anyone found out, I would get in trouble. Today, I got a call from social services about the "bruise" on his face. FML
Today, I went to go give my boss a high five for a job well done. I missed his hand and accidentally slapped his ass on the way down. FML
Today while at my job as a store clerk, I walked by a family. I smiled at their little boy, who responded by flipping me off. As I was walking away, I looked back in time to catch his dad give him a high-five. FML
Today, a waiter came up and and put out his hand so I gave him a high five and pounded it. He then says, "Um, that was a nice high five but I wanted your plate." FML
Today, I was working the register at a local grocery store. A kid about 5 years old was having trouble zipping his jacket. I reached out to help him and he started screaming "No bad touch bad touch!" and kicked me in the knee. Everyone looked. FML
Today, I was at the mall with my little brother. I saw him touching some expensive objects, so I slapped his arm. I noticed he wasn't my brother when he started crying and his real mom slapped me in the face. FML
Today, as usual, I worked at McDonald's. Although I tried to diffuse the situation, an old man was absolutely furious, and punched me in the face over BBQ sauce. FML
Today, while shopping, my six-year-old son threw a tantrum because I wouldn't buy him a video game. I ended up having to grab his arm and leave the store. He screamed that I was kidnapping him, at which point I was socked in the face and pinned to the floor by three bystanders. FML
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Top comments
OmniFML 0
FALCON PUNCH!
Aelaena 6
You should have followed it up by saying 'chew with your mouth closed! what have i taught you?!'
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Comments (171)
drinkupgorgeous 0
#51, that's because of your metabolism, not McDonald's. But Mickey D's is perfectly fine in moderation, not every single meal every damn day, which is what a lot of people do because it's fast and cheap, which leads to weight gain (or not for some).
Talia070 0
Boo hoo, you smacked him in the face .
kaly_fml 1
To people asking why OP would high five that hard anyways... they probably didn't go to high five hard. Now and days people scream "CHILD ABUSE" even if a parent gives their kid a little tap. It's ridiculous and the reason kids are growing up so bratty now and days. Because parents can't punish their children anymore when they do wrong for fear of having a social worker on their door and people automatically assuming they're a child abuser.
sunfleur13 0
LOL. Come on people lighten up. It's a cute and funny story. All of a sudden everyone wants to get all righteous. I work with abused and negelected children, it's nice to hear a parent is spending time with their child and having fun. It made me giggle, thanks for sharing.
spirited_away33 0
I'm so sick and tired of these stories that end with "now everyone thinks (insert blank)" It doesn't really matter what everyone thinks!! gosh
lich_fml 0
AHAHA @ 21.
Nightfallz 0
Haha he deserved it. Maybe now he won't do that.
CR24 0
Well, at least he didn't try to get you to pound it...
curryndricegirll 0
Slapping your child doesn't mean you're a child beater.
we5leyz 4
haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahahahahahaha