Anonymous
Bronx, United States
Today, while eating cotton candy, a drunk person came up to me and said "HEY! COTTON CANDY!" And bit me. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Anonymous
This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff
United Kingdom
Costume parties are the worst
Today, I went to a party dressed as a Pinata. Drunk people tried to hit me all night. FML
RequilaRainbow
Canada
Today, while waiting outside a liquor store for my boyfriend, a drunk guy leaned over my shoulder, took a large bite out of my burger, and walked away. FML
Anonymous
Mexico
Today, some guy I passed in the street was so high out of his mind, he beat the crap out of me, thinking I was a piñata. FML
adeeri
Jackson, United States
Today, a little kid accidentally ran into me at the pool. He apologized by biting my leg. FML
Amanda
United States
Today, I went to the carnival with a guy I like. When we went on the big scary ride where you flip upside down a lot, he asked me to be his girlfriend. Then, I threw up on him. FML
mew
Canada
Today, one of the children at my daycare came up to me and bit me on the face. He laughed so hard at my scream, that he threw up in my lap. FML
bad karma
United States
Candy Andy
Today, I was so hungry that I literally stole candy from a baby. FML
Anonymous
Canada
Today, a completely drunk girl walked across the bar and punched me in the face because I was wearing the same dress as her, and her boyfriend had said it looked better on me. While I was screaming at her for being a stupid bitch, she puked all over me, wiped her mouth, and laughed before she passed out. FML
feartheend511
United States
Today, while my friends were over, my mom took too many of her pills and walked around the house nude. She then bit me. FML
lemonlime66
Look before you leap
Today, while sitting in a busy store waiting area with my brother, he went to the bathroom and came back with his hands cupped, saying he found a mouse. He then threw it on the magazine in my lap. I jumped up, screaming and flailing about while everyone stared and laughed. It was a piece of cotton. FML
Top comments
Marie54321 19
At least you weren't eating a hot dog, who knows where he could have bit you then?
CJB3228 17
I bet you tasted just as good
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (60)
Marie54321 19
At least you weren't eating a hot dog, who knows where he could have bit you then?
tygerarmy 35
At least the drunk person bit the OP, and not the cotton candy, bit wounds heal, cotton candy is precious.
ohgeejosee 19
and so the zombie war begins...
CJB3228 17
I bet you tasted just as good
silveronica5 12
I think he needs glasses, hope you're okay though
wastedpenguin 14
way more then a vision problem if your mistaking people for cotton candy
JocelynKaulitz 28
Yeah no glasses. Just the alcohol talking and seeing…and maybe some other things too.
singer0421 32
That gives new meaning to the phrase "fluffy."
Corvo_Attano_4 12
Hopefully the stranger was really attractive
Hiimhaileypotter 53
Yeah, being bitten by a stranger is only weird if said stranger is ugly...
bachoman 10
Benign intoxicated does thrown off your depth perception...
Marie54321 19
In my first comment, I meant *bit
kabza 13
somebody thinks they're luis suarez..
nevermindthemind 18
careful you might become drunken vampire
PerditaDessa 38
Maybe you looked like the sweeter of his choices. In all seriousness, though, if he broke the skin be sure to go see a doctor.