Today, I found out that my kids are both my half-brothers, and the fertility tests my wife had us do a few years ago showed that I'm sterile. She didn't tell me until I found the test results in her desk and asked her about it. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, in front of my family, my brother's wife announced that she was pregnant with their first child. Everyone joked around and said I was next. Two weeks ago I found out that I'm sterile. FML
Today with a DNA test, I found out that my husband is my half brother. 30 years ago his father made a donation to the sperm bank my mother used, and I’m the result. To make matters worse, I’m pregnant. FML
Today, the paternity test came back. It's like I suspected all along; my "son" is actually my half-brother. FML
Today, I found out that my husband is the biological father of my baby sister. FML
Today, I found out wife has two baby daddies for our two kids. I’m neither one’s baby daddy. FML
Today, I learned I’m shooting blanks and can’t have children. My wife’s response was that her brother can be our sperm donor. She has no issue with this. FML
Today, I got the results proving if my ex-girlfriend's kid was mine. The results came back negative and I can't have kids. This wouldn't be a problem if I didn't have 3 kids with my wife. FML
Today, I found out that I'm going to be a father. Too bad I can't tell my wife. FML
Today, I found out that I’m not the father of my “son” but I'm his uncle. The only thing my wife did was to shrug and say, “Shit happens.” FML
Today, after nearly a month, I found out my wife isn't pregnant after all. She was just screwing around to win a bet with her friends on how long it'd take me to figure out the truth. FML
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Top comments
BurnInDemonFire 39
I don't know what method your wife used to get your dad to impregnate her, though I'd guess they did it the biblical way, but keeping the truth from you is unforgivable. Are you prepared to maintain your marriage, and continue raising your half-brothers as your sons? And how are you going to keep your relationship with your dad together, now that you know he knocked up your wife?
1ninjanina 7
This needs a follow-up. I read it that his father impregnated her, didn’t even consider that a half brother “donating” might’ve been a possibility. Amazing what a little punctuation mark can do (or not do).
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Comments (38)
Davros 12
Now what the hell are you supposed to do at Christmas?
joonsson 21
If I was on the jury judging you for killing those two disgusting piles of trash I’d make sure you walked. Divorce her right away and cut all ties with both of them, then make sure everybody they know finds out.
Andrew Ross 5
best case scenario his father artificially inseminated his wife. worst case his father railed his wife out multiple times over many years depending on how old your kids are. your father is either a helpful guy or pond scum , and his wife is a lying bitch either way
samomaha 17
I don't understand what the kids' ages have to do with dad being a good fuy or bad guy?
Andrew Ross 5
if you didn't bring it up yet get a 23 and me for your whole family and watch the reactions when they realize you know
Agent JPN 9
So, did your dad xxxx your wife and sire the kids, or did your half-brother xxxx your wife and sire your kids?? Either way... wtf??
ChakatBlackstar 29
Curse the shortness of the FMLs! We need a follow up explaining the how, why, and what he's doing about it afterwards.
chioch 13
Wow, I can't even imagine what that must feel like. That's so wrong. Not only to you, but to your kids (or half brothers I guess) as well. How old are they?
Charlie Given 28
Oooo Please follow up with this, I've read some pretty ****** up shit before but DAMN, time to leave get a good lawyer and remember no matter what the kids see YOU as there Father they are innocent in all this and probably shouldn't know it would **** them up mentally,but remember any male can be a sperm donor but it takes a man to be a Father. good luck and so sorry 😟
dwight7476 11
Instant divorce
franniemae 8
just wow. this deserves a serious follow up explanation. asap