Today, I found out that I’m not the father of my “son” but I'm his uncle. The only thing my wife did was to shrug and say, “Shit happens.” FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I found out I'm an uncle. Normally this would be great news, except I have spent the last 8 years thinking I was her father. FML
Today, I found out that my 6-year-old son was named after my wife's "Favorite Uncle" because he might also be the father. FML
Today, I found out wife has two baby daddies for our two kids. I’m neither one’s baby daddy. FML
Today, I found out that my husband is the biological father of my baby sister. FML
Today, I found out that I'm going to be a father. Too bad I can't tell my wife. FML
Today, thanks to my wife's confession, I found out that the 14 year old child I've raised since I was 16 isn't related to me at all. But at least this narrows the real father down to one of three other guys. FML
Today, I found out my wife of 5 years, with whom we have three kids, is actually my cousin. At a family dinner someone had pointed out how much she looks like my uncle. We laughed until she mentioned that she was adopted from the same town my uncle's ex-wife had a baby. A few questions and a blood test later, we all learned the sick truth. FML
Today, I found out that my kids are both my half-brothers, and the fertility tests my wife had us do a few years ago showed that I'm sterile. She didn't tell me until I found the test results in her desk and asked her about it. FML
Today, I found out my soon-to-be husband and father of my unborn child is already married to another man. FML
Today, I found out my husband is having a baby. Too bad I'm not pregnant. FML
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Top comments
Earl_KarmasBitch 36
Divorce happens too.
RichardPencil 32
Oh, brother!
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Comments (5)
Bogrbon 27
Was this the same dude from Argentina whose wife just walked out? Would fit the narrative.
RichardPencil 32
Oh, brother!
SirEnigM0nk 22
Where art thou? Sleeping around it seems.
Earl_KarmasBitch 36
Divorce happens too.
Iamthebanzai22 21
Well, I mean, if you let her get away with that attitude then her reaction was absolutely correct.
BurnInDemonFire 39
On the plus side you're now free to leave the cheater to struggle as a single parent while you get a fresh start, and more money from future paychecks.