Today, I got the results proving if my ex-girlfriend's kid was mine. The results came back negative and I can't have kids. This wouldn't be a problem if I didn't have 3 kids with my wife. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I found out that my kids are both my half-brothers, and the fertility tests my wife had us do a few years ago showed that I'm sterile. She didn't tell me until I found the test results in her desk and asked her about it. FML
Today, I found out my ex-wife (who I have kids with) is now pregnant with another guy's twin babies. We have only been divorced a couple of months. FML
Today, my husband presented me with a DNA test proving that our newborn daughter isn't his. Confused, I got her tested again. She's not a match to me either. FML
Today, thanks to my wife's confession, I found out that the 14 year old child I've raised since I was 16 isn't related to me at all. But at least this narrows the real father down to one of three other guys. FML
Today, I found out my wife is pregnant with our third child. This wouldn't be a problem but we only want two kids and I had a vasectomy 6 weeks ago (they take 3 months to be effective). We weren't careful only one time, and since it was difficult to conceive the two we wanted, we didn't think it would be a problem. FML
Today, I found out I'm pregnant with my second child. This wouldn't be so bad if my son wasn't only 10 months old and my partner, the father of my children, hadn't been secretly seeing his ex wife. FML
Today, my ex mother-in-law stupidly made an offhand comment, so I got my kids DNA tested. NONE, I repeat NONE of them is mine. When I think of the thousands I’ve paid in child support I’ll never get back, and now my own mother thinks I’m an asshole for refusing to pay any further. FML
Today, to my horror, I discovered I will owe child support for the kids my ex and I adopted together since she couldn't have any. I've met someone else and I'm planning on having real kids with her, but these payments will destroy everything. FML
Today, I went to the doctor's office after getting a positive pregnancy test. She did another one to confirm the result, which came back negative. My husband is wandering around with a great big smile on his face, because he isn't going to "have a rugrat." FML
Today, I learned I’m shooting blanks and can’t have children. My wife’s response was that her brother can be our sperm donor. She has no issue with this. FML
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Top comments
MidnaLink 35
Just to be absolutely sure this isn’t some weirdo case of bad luck, get a paternity test on all 3 kids. I hate to say it, but chances are your wife will confess to an affair… or she’ll be just as confused as you are if the results come back favorable. Either way, good luck going forward. Oh, and make sure NOTHING AND NO ONE interferes with the results.
Johnny5 16
Or you became sterile after you conceived your 3 kids. That test doesn’t say you’ve always been sterile.
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Comments (12)
MidnaLink 35
Just to be absolutely sure this isn’t some weirdo case of bad luck, get a paternity test on all 3 kids. I hate to say it, but chances are your wife will confess to an affair… or she’ll be just as confused as you are if the results come back favorable. Either way, good luck going forward. Oh, and make sure NOTHING AND NO ONE interferes with the results.
IHaveThePower 18
TBH false positives and negatives happen all the time--every test I've had swears up and down I don't have PCOS, and yet here I am with a beard, three-month-long cycle, and more testosterone than has any business being in an ovary-based body without transitioning. There's no reason to believe the wife cheated without some follow-up testing.
Johnny5 16
Or you became sterile after you conceived your 3 kids. That test doesn’t say you’ve always been sterile.
alycion 39
Entirely possible. There are conditions that reduce and eliminate fertility as a person ages.
J15237 25
Now you really need to make a choice. Do you just let it go and enjoy the 3 children who have been calling you daddy or do you disrupt your life? Honestly though its not the kids fault that your wife is clearly a ****. I am sorry to say that, but its the truth. I would not want to be in your shoes, but I would come out and ask my wife for the truth and then see if you guys can clear it up. However, do your best to make sure the kids know its not their fault.
fullacrapallofyou 14
Sounds like u married a hoe
Sady_Ct 38
I was with a man for 5 years and we tried for a child and it didn’t happen. Tests showed he was completely infertile. We split due to his being a mammas boy, and his next lady was pregnant within 6 months. They now have two kids and have been married for 3 years, with both kids showing as genetically his. I have also been pregnant twice with two mid stage miscarriages. Tests can be wrong. A paternity test won’t show if you are infertile either.
RichardPencil 32
Sounds like a bunch of ho's ******* each other.
jbuckets_404 39
Richard, there's no mention of farming in this fml, sorry to say....
RatInc. 7
oof
Loz88 3
Paternity tests don’t show if you’re infertile
randybryant799 21
Instead of being so suspicious did it not ever occur to you that you became sterile after you fathered 3 kids?