linzl00
Springfield, United States
Today, the "man cold" has infected my brother. He honestly thinks he's dying. He only has the sniffles. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Anonymous
Calhan, United States
Today, my brother accidentally hit me in the throat. After I stopped coughing, choking, and feeling like I was going to die, he came back into my room, quietly said "I know your weakness," and left. FML
sickmom
New Orleans, United States
Today, I have the flu. I woke up to my son leaning over me, inches from my face, breathing in deeply. Apparently, he was trying to get sick so he could stay home from school. He's 15. FML
FuckingDone
Enterprise, United States
Today, my brother's refused to shower after 2 weeks of dripping sweat and never changing clothes. He claims the smell is just his "manly musk" and if I can't handle it, then maybe I'm the problem. FML
Anonymous
False alarm
Today, my uncle called me at work, telling me to rush him to the doctor's. I get home and he doesn't"t want to go anywhere. He says he has the chills, so I turn on the furnace. Next he says he's too hot, and stripped to his underwear. I ask him to let me take him to doctor. He does nothing. Work is expecting me to bring a doctor's note tomorrow. FML
Let it bleed
United States
Lockdown throwback!
Today, my brother is staying over for a while. I thought I was prepared for this, but I totally forgot that he is inexplicably prone to having random nosebleeds. He's going through my Kleenex faster than a horny teenage boy left alone in his room. Time to hoard Kleenex like how people hoarded toilet paper in 2020. FML
Anonymous
United States
Today, my mom tells my sister that she is worried about her because she has a headache and feels like she might be getting a slight cold. I have had the flu for two weeks and have a 103 degree fever. I ask, "What about me?" Her response? "Stay away from your sister." FML
Anonymous
Today, my brother has two broken arms and needs help wiping his own ass. Bonus, he has bad diarrhoea from the food poisoning he got from the shrimp he made me hand-feed him yesterday. FML
blarghhhh
Owosso, United States
Today, I woke up with the flu. My wife thinks I'm faking it so we don't have to go on date night, even though I've been on the toilet all day. FML
Snow joke, I feel like hell
United States
Plough me out
Today, snow finally arrived in my area, in very large quantities. Also today, I seem to have caught my dad's cold. The town is too snowed in for traveling and my medications are running low, so I guess we'll suffer together. FML
finalfantasy
Aurora, United States
Today, my brother thought it would be absolutely hilarious to replace my cold sore cream with superglue. FML
Top comments
metallica_wins 20
Maybe tell him to "man" up?
rhcpgurl 18
Guys are usually like that. If men had periods, they'd check into the hospital for a week per month and drugged up on morphine.
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Comments (83)
metallica_wins 20
Maybe tell him to "man" up?
incoherentrmblr 22
Metallica - Creeping Death.
naarz 9
Aaaaw poor guy, get well soon, and OP you should consider talking to him, before he totally loses it.
Misaki18 17
Is this like the infamous man bun, "mun" or man scarf, "marf?" Because this man cold, "mold" could potentially kill him.
jazzy_123 20
don't forget man purse, "murse".
Tomcuro 11
It's the second most deadly disease known to man, after "Man Influenza"
flashback.miss 28
Dress up as the Grim Reaper.
Enslaved 38
But BOC specifically tells us "Don't Fear the Reaper".
Kiki242 19
What's a man cold?
mattjamt 16
Well, its when a man, gets a cold....
FlyingPie 17
And how is it different from when a woman gets a cold? Does "man cold" really need to be its own distinct thing?
piggle 9
Yes because men act like they're dying and need to be babied when they have a cold. Not all do but I know plenty of men who act like this
onlychildFTW 34
I don't know any that do actually act like that. You must know a lot of babies.
Kiki242 19
Thank you, Piggle. I was confused as to how a man getting a cold is any different than a woman getting one.
edanielleh 21
@4 I was going to ask the same thing. i never go around saying i have a women cold. Men... you can't expect to be respected as tough if you act like a baby. Of course, the same goes for women who insisted to be respected but then want a guy to totally take care of them...
Levvy 22
So is there a difference between a man with a cold and a man with a "man cold"?
FlyingPie 17
None of my (male) friends act like that when they get a cold.
golden_warrior 23
Even the biggest of men cry for their mommies when they get sick
Kiki242 19
How many of you are there?
thisguy22 33
Everyone likes to be doted on, now and again. There is not anything wrong with that...
HisHarleyQuinn 14
There is when those same men expect their wives/girlfriends to put in a full 9 hour shift and cook and clean, while sick.
murdersquirrel 15
I was once expected to paint the kitchen ceiling with a head pounding, mucous filled cold. and I did it cause it was actually easier than making my now ex understand what a prick he is.
iknowiwantyou 13
33 you actually did it?! I don't know what to say except it was pretty dumb on your part. A simple "I'm sick and I can't" should've sufficed.
Rosebudx 32
Ugh, I hate those colds. You don't look so sick from the outside, but you can't breathe and your whole face feels swollen and your entire body aches and each breath feels like you're breathing in pure liquid...I hope he feels better soon.
evan_7899 28
According to your profile your a woman.. how could you be experiencing a man cold if your a female... transgenderism may be the case here.
80skid 15
*you're
nopasanada 3
I dont care ir you're a guy or woman but I feel everything u wrote down...I feel like shit
Rosebudx 32
Most "man colds" that I hear about are of the more severe variety rather than the sniffles. The only difference is in how each gender stereotypically deals with said cold. I may not be a man, but I do get bad colds and loathe them.
rhcpgurl 18
Guys are usually like that. If men had periods, they'd check into the hospital for a week per month and drugged up on morphine.
ninjuh_wingman 29
If men had periods, they'd be in drug induced comas from all the drugs they'd be taking to stop it.
cyttex 13
I'd argue with you 10 but if that happened to me I'd scream and run repeatedly into a wall till I knocked myself out.
Enslaved 38
So maybe our painfully monthly periods explains why some women have a higher tolerance for misery than some guys do? When others are sick I have empathy because I know it sucks to feel ill. I'd cater to it only if the favour of being looked after during my turn of not feeling well was returned. (:
cryssycakesx3 23
if I had periods I'd want to mainline morphine too.
TheDrifter 24
Mainlining morphine is fun all the time, why wait until you're in agony?
owhyowhy 4
Give him last rights as a prank.
Fuaaad1994 31
Man flu is viscous, surprised you both are alive
miyaviichan 27
What's the viscosity? Ahaha
evan_7899 28
Maybe all of the thick mucus said brother is producing is very viscous ;)
pam241 15
your brother is a sorry excuse for a man
iAlissa 34
You're unnecessarily rude.