megasniper240
Ronkonkoma, United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, the Jehovah's Witnesses witnessed me whacking off on my couch. FML
megasniper240 tells us more.
OP here, to clear it up I was on my futon in my living room and they happened to catch a glimpse through the window. Also, it was an old lady with her husband.
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Top comments
anythingmustbe 18
God is everywhere
cr3ativity 15
Jesus is coming!!! Oh wait, you're coming.
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Comments (420)
Jasminoss22 6
I wish there was a 'like' button, whahaha
isaiaah 6
Be more careful next time!
TheDrifter 24
A chalk outline of a person surrounded by scattered watchtower magazines and police tape around the yard?
alwaysbored13 14
At least they finally witnessed something ...
Pandacupcakelove 26
Curtains! >.
peanutfoo 19
That's amazing..
bmkc4 1
Why did you answer the door if you were masterbating?
screamo_neve 12
He never said he answered the door...
bmkc4 1
True...
isaiaah 6
Firstly they most likely saw him through the window, and secondly it's spelt "masturbating"
bmkc4 1
Sorry 217, I didn't realize you were the spelling police
goose12321 11
Is your name Jehovah?
KaiserSD 8
So they were Watching your Tower, eh? Two questions: A) did you finish, and B) did they still try to convert you?
fyreprincess 3
watching your tower. nice play on words.
KaiserSD 8
Thank you, unfortunately it's a female OP, so unless she has a vibrator she calls the Tower, the joke is kind of wasted, lol.
Llamacod 11
my phone app has op's sex symbol being the circle with the arrow pointing up at an angle which is male. sooooo, unless he uses a vibrating butt plug he calls "the tower" you're initial comment referring to his penis fits perfectly
andrade_anthony 0
Convert?? This is dumb they don't convert you to anything
crissaay 0
They don't try and convert you.
Dracoboxer357 36
So someone, er, Witnessed you doing what every male does, or has done before. A bit embarrassing, but not the end of the world. Odds are, I suspect they didn't try to barge into your house to convert you after that display, just probably whacked...er, Walked off. ;P (ps: It is your house, but if it bothers you, please close the blinds. If not....carry on.)
Tali147 16
I am personally not of the male gender but I know that not ever make does or has done that. Jehovah's Witnesses for example, do not.
Llamacod 11
sure 124, and for the last few hundred years catholic priests don't have sex......................................................... .........................except with little boys?
Dracoboxer357 36
124- You really believe that not every single man out there has at least Once in his life experimented growing up and touched himself sexually? You can't know that for certain, what you Can know is some males haven't Admitted to having done it at least once before, but it's almost a statistical impossibility that it hasn't happened to everyone, once. Respectfully including yourself, my dear lady. You'd be hard pressed to convince me otherwise, but that's okay, you don't need me to believe you. We are just internet strangers, my opinion shouldn't really matter, so please don't take any offense to my commentary. :)