shygurl434
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, the boy I like finally acknowledged me. He came up to me and uttered two words: "Nice pooper." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
taman
This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff
United States
Stinker
Today, I took this girl out that I've been crushing on for 2 years to a fancy restaurant. At one point during the date, I had to get up to take a massive dump. As I was walking back to the table, a little boy stood up and shouted, "THAT'S THE POOPOO MAN!" in front of the whole restaurant. FML
Anonymous
United States
Good job
Today, the little boy I nanny for finally stood up and went 'pee-pee on the potty'. I started cheering and clapping, making a big deal out of it. I flushed while he smiled proudly and pooped on the floor. FML
HappilyNeverAfter
Port Perry, Canada
My body hates me
Today, a guy asked me out, and I felt butterflies in my stomach. I soon realized that it wasn't butterflies, but an unexpected bowel movement. I stood there awkwardly, looking him in the eyes, then farted hard. FML
ordinaryday
Edmonton, Canada
Today, I reached a new level of commitment in my relationship with my boyfriend. This happened when he pooped on the side of the road beside my truck, while talking and making eye contact with me while wiping. FML
luckygirl
United States
Today, I was hit on by a guy who decided to use the line, "My love for you is like diarrhea, I just can't hold it in." FML
Anonymous
United States
Today, this girl I like just told me a funny story about her pooping adventures. We shared a laugh and she told me "I could never say that to my boyfriend, but I can to you. I don't know, it's like the uglier the boy, the more comfortable I am with him." FML
not impressed
Nanaimo, Canada 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I told my boyfriend that I love him. He replied, dead serious, "That's nice and all, but anal speaks louder than words." FML
ohwell
United States
Needed to know
Today, I finally confessed to the guy I've liked for two years. I told him that I've really liked him for a long time, and that I knew he had a girlfriend and I didn't expect anything from him, I just wanted him to know. His response? "Are you done? 'Cause I need to go to the bathroom." FML
Anonymous
Canada 🌶️ Spicy
Romantic
Today, at the end of another long workday, my husband announced that he was going to take a shower. Attempting to rekindle some much needed romance in our lives, I seductively asked him, "Want me to join you?" He replied, "Sure. But first I have to poop." FML
Dana
Netherlands 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I finally mustered the courage to tell my crush how I feel. He's a straight-A student and very nice in general. After I finished pouring my heart out, he stared at me for a bit and then said: "Nice rack." FML
Top comments
Apolloyn 0
thats a good thing
WtFiMdAdDy 0
nice pooper? really. how old is he? hahaha....
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Comments (75)
aardvarkish 17
Congrats.+Sounds+like+you%27re+in.+
madmonkeykilla 0
op+deserves+it+for+havin+her+cheeks+spread+wide
ohSNAPyall 27
op is the goatse guy
jackie_loka 0
wth how is this an fml? I would of been like thanks!
GinandJenkem 0
niiice
medog 0
yah thts a compliment u should be happy
Sexysexton 0
I love it when guys compliment my ass!u should to!
tyrellaraven 0
I agree with 13, that's what OP should have said.
xForeverLifeless 0
I geuss thats a Compliment....
fmylife82 0
what is nice pooper?
RubyRae 2
A nice ass.
maskedman 9
You like him and now you know he likes you (or at least parts of you). I don't see what the problem is. By the way, I am definitely using that line at the club this weekend.
crackiebob 0
this is a win. that line is always a winner.
picturescrazy 24
Uh, WTS? Pooper=butt, or does it mean ass hole? o.o
crackiebob 0
yes, yes it does