Anonymous
United States
Today, the airport security guard told me to lift my fat rolls so he could finish patting me down. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
muffintop
Canada
Today, I was standing at airport security. One of the bag inspectors asked me to remove my travel pouch, pointing to the lump under my shirt. I didn't know how to tell him that it was just one of my fat rolls. FML
jennyygrace
United States
Today, I was walking through airport security when a guard began making lewd gestures at his crotch, while looking at me. I was outraged until I realized he was trying to tell me that my fly was down. FML
GothicbunnyxC
Canada
Today, I was going through airport security. Trying to get things over and done with quickly, I dropped my pants without a second thought. Turns out they just wanted me to remove my shoes and belt. FML
thebickster
United States
Today, I was boarding my flight when I got pulled aside for looking suspicious. As she was opening my bag, I said, "Be careful, I jammed so many clothes in there it may explode." I was then strip searched for my trouble. FML
sufia
Pakistan
Today, I was traveling. At airport security, the woman patting me down felt something "down there" and asked me what I was wearing. I told her it was a sanitary napkin. She put her hands inside my pants just to be sure. FML
androgynous
United States
TSA
Today, I was going through airport security. As my bags were being scanned, I was told that I was selected for extra searching. Right as the security guard was about to frisk me, he froze up and asked me, "You're a male, right?" I am, and I used to think that it was obvious. FML
missy
United States
Never joke with TSA
Today, I missed my flight because I was held in airport security because I'd "threatened" an employee. He had confiscated my eyelash curler and jokingly I asked if he thought I was going to curl him to death. He didn't laugh. FML
atang
United States
Smugglers unite
Today, I was leaving a clothing store when the security guard stopped me and demanded that I surrender the clothing I was "trying to steal" by hiding it under my shirt. It turns out, he was just looking at my pot belly. FML
Anonymous
United States
How much?
Today, I was at the airport to catch a plane. It was very crowded at the gate and there was nowhere to sit except for a flat metal bench, so I sat on that. Turns out I was sitting on a luggage scale, so my weight was displayed for everybody to see. FML
A continent away
Tallinn, Estonia
Today, the security at the airport were nice enough to remind me to take the laptop out of my bag. I wish they'd also reminded me to put it back in before I left. FML
Top comments
ArtIsResistance7 1
Time to do some good ol' fashion exercise... Put your hands up to the ceiling, bend your knees, and touch your toes. Do your daily exercises, you're gonna look like skin and bone. :)
Monado 0
Were you too big to fit through the metal detector too?
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Comments (202)
erockinthesuburb 17
You'd be surprised what you can hide underneath those rolls, fatty. Drugs, knives, guns, WMDs, etc.
darkshadow1977 0
you forgot food
illmatic2 16
I know someone who had to give a really fat guy a spongebath and she found a sandwhich. He said he was "saving it for later".
awesomechick618 0
ur s.n. is sperm O.O
nabo4u 0
you didn't just wake up today and realize that you're a fat slob. so this isn't a fyl. ydi for not having any self control. buy a bike. that way you can get some exercise on your way to mcdonalds
darkmis1 18
Unless the bike breaks under the massive weight of the OP. OP: I'm sick and tired of fat people complaining about being fat. It's no ones fault but your own! Stop complaining and do something! We're not going to feel sorry for you!
damador 0
Go to the gym OP. Wear a sauna suit it helps burn the fat even faster :)
v_garcia3 0
time to pull out the Richard Simmons work out tapes!!!
noobacabra 0
dude more like FHL for having to go through your disgusting fat rolls!
garlicjr08 0
I'm happy to hear they did a full search u should be greatful
trippin10 0
Sucks for the security guard XD
tradit03 0
either u r stating what he implied or he is very rude and I think u can sue for that.
avoidthegirl 6
You can't sue someone just because they pointed out the obvious. Besides, do you REALLY think he wanted to search a fattie? Hell no.
ArtIsResistance7 1
In that case, she should sue Burger King for selling her one too many Whoppers. I think someone actually tried to do something like that.
TheIrishJaneDoe 9
I'm totally suing the next time I have to: share my airplane seat with some douche who was too much in denial or too proud to buy one for each cheek; spend extra time in a security line for some douche to get his rolls searched; or dodge one of those cart things carrying fat people to their gates.
gabbster95 0
jajaja yes that would be nicer....
gabbster95 0
i meant #46
xoKylie 0
I feel bad for the security guard, that's just gross.