Today, someone said that giving men gifts is so easy, just pay attention to what he says. He wants Chelsea on top of the league table. How am I supposed to do that? FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, just like every other celebratory day (like my anniversary or birthday) I ordered my own Christmas present. My husband doesn't get it. I tried to explain. He openly admits he has no idea what I like and has no interest in learning, but wants me to have something to open so he won't look bad. FML
Today, I bought a guy I’ve liked for months a Christmas present and expressed how much he meant to me. He said, “Lol, thanks.” He then went on a date with another girl. Apparently, being loving and caring towards guys gets you used and rejected. My lover girl era is now over. FML
Today, because it was our first Christmas as a couple, I was careful to get my girlfriend what I considered to be a very thoughtful gift. She opened it, took one look at it, made a face like I'd just kicked a puppy, and told me that in future it would be better if I just gave her money so she could buy her own presents. FML
Today, for our anniversary, I asked what my wife wanted and she said not to bother spending money, so I didn’t, and she called me a tight git. Then for her birthday I bought her a gift anyway and she had a go at me for ignoring her wishes and wasting money. I literally cannot win. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I gave each other early Christmas gifts. I gave him a basketball signed by his favorite player, which took me forever to find. He got me diet pills. FML
Today, after having my husband ask if I 'had any plans' for the weekend, and him mentioning that he got me something special, he played his PS4 for hours, ignored me, then finally took a break to hand me a tiny box of chocolates. I can't even be mad because he looked so proud. FML
Today, after ordering a custom $200 Valentine's Day gift box for my husband, he gave it away to a female coworker upon delivery because Valentine's Day isn't for guys. I hope she like the new Xbox one controller and all the gift cards as well. FML
Today, my son told me he liked a girl at school. I told him to be extra sweet to her, carry her bag, and make every day brighter for her. My husband snorted and said, "That's simp shit. Don't do any of that. Act like a man, and if she's not into you, shrug and move on." FML
Today, I had a very long, complicated talk with my girlfriend. Apparently, since she isn't religious, she doesn't have to give anyone Christmas presents, and yet expects everyone to give her some. She then told me what I should get her. FML
Today, I told my husband I wanted to make him happy by giving him a baby. He told me either I can make him happy, or I can give him a baby, but I can’t do both. FML
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Top comments
rgkkk 17
Buy him Football Manager game. The rest is up to him
Wadlaen 24
I don't suppose it would help if you signed up for Chelsea either..?
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Comments (5)
Wadlaen 24
I don't suppose it would help if you signed up for Chelsea either..?
Yudith 28
It would be easier to sign him up for Chelsea and let him carry the team to the top.
rgkkk 17
Buy him Football Manager game. The rest is up to him
stickyface 17
Piece of cake. Buy a table, gift it to the league, hire a girl named Chelsea to dance on it. Couldn't be simpler.
FluffythePink 23
You could get yourself a Chelsea football kit, stick a sticker on his chest saying "league table" and then get on top? Just make sure you get the right kit and don't mix the seasons up...