Today, one of my three-year-old twin daughters asked, "Dad, can we get a cat?" I replied in a gentle dad voice, "No, honey, dad is allergic to cats. That means they make him sneeze and sniffle. So we can't get a cat. Sorry." After a slight pause, the other asked, "When you die can we get a cat?" FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my mom got a cat. I'm allergic to cats, so I politely asked my mom why she got it. Her response: "I want you to finally want to move out." I turned eighteen two weeks ago. FML
Today, I told my wife if she wanted to get a divorce, she just had to get a cat since I'm deathly allergic. She got two. FML
Today, I told my mom I'm severely allergic to my cat and that the doctor told me it would be best to get rid of the cat. Somewhat jokingly, I told her it was either me or the cat. She chose the cat. She was serious too. FML
Today, my boyfriend woke up wheezing terribly, aching, and sneezing. He's allergic to cats. I have 2 and they are my babies. He gave me an ultimatum, him or the cats. I haven't figured out how I'm going to tell him that I choose the cats. FML
Today, I was at the doctor's getting a check up. He asked me if I was allergic to anything, to which I blurted out, "Cats." He gave me a weird look and said, "Don't worry, I won't give you cats." FML
Today, after 25 years living with my dad, who is highly allergic to cats, I was finally able to adopt two kittens to live in my new place, just like I have always wanted. Guess who else is highly allergic to cats? Me, it seems. FML
Today, after being diagnosed with cat allergies, I explained to my cat-loving boyfriend that the doctor strongly recommended not allowing the cat in the bedroom. At 1:30 a.m. my boyfriend got out of the bed to go sleep in the spare room because, "the cat is sad." FML
Today, my four-year-old asked me when I was going to die. I replied "Not for a long time, why?" He looked at me and stated "Because I only want to live with Daddy." FML
Today, to celebrate moving into a new apartment, my girlfriend decided she would get a kitten. She didn't know I'm allergic to cats. When I told her, she decided that she couldn't date someone who couldn't be around her cat; the one she doesn't have yet. FML
Today, I went to the doctor to find out why I've been feeling so sick the past several weeks. Turns out, I'm severely allergic to the cat of my girlfriend of two years. I told her "It's me or the cat." She chose the cat. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Curtieeeez 0
You gotta love kids ;D
purple5 0
Hehe, cute! She's only three, so I wouldn't take her too seriously :3
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (160)
ThotBoutTheGame 0
haha thats actually funny xD
shacala 0
awwww... they sound so cute. of course they dont mean that.
misz_italy 0
i think the dad put this up more for people to get a laugh out of it, then a serious real FML.. they are 3, 3 year olds are funny & they don't even mean to be. you can't help but laugh, if i had 3 year old twins & they said that, i'd laugh & i'd put it on here for other ppl to get a laugh too. =)
Zpecial26 0
lol evil twin...
AnaMaree 0
Your kids sound homicidal.
Miss_Tyff 0
Hahaha That's great. But they are only three, so you know, you can't get upset. They say whatever is on their mind. Doesn't mean they actually want you to die.
Nakedsquirrel 5
Not an FML. Very little kids will say stuff like that. No, an FML would be the two of them throwing a massive tantrum and together destroying lots of expensive things. Man the hell up, dad. What will you do when they're 16 and say bitchy things and actually know what they're saying?
oyster42 0
My dad also was allergic to cats. Solution: I got a cat, and it stayed at my grandmother's house. Now, the cat and my grandmother are practically interdependent on one another, and the cat never lets me pet her.
MemeLOL 0
i said the same to my mom, except i told her if i could keep her shoes when she died=*
idontgiveone 0
#25 LOL. Aw well, can they get a puppy?