Today, my vegan boyfriend told me that if he were forced to kill either his cat or me, he'd kill me because he "would never kill an animal." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my vegan girlfriend openly admitted that she'd let me die if she had to choose between saving my life or an animal's. She actually seemed confused as to why that upset me. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me that he would leave me if I didn't seek help for my eating disorder. The eating disorder in question? Vegetarianism. FML
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. Why? Because I became a vegetarian. Apparently, he doesn't believe in "not eating meat." FML
Today, I told my girlfriend that I'm a vegan. She replied, "So, you're allergic to meat?" FML
Today, my boyfriend told me the sauce he made for our dinner that was meat-based, trying to show me how nice meat is and stop me being a weirdo vegan. The reason I’m vegan is because my digestive system can’t handle animal protein. I’m writing this from the bathroom, vomiting myself to death. FML
Today, after being a vegetarian for 5 years, I found out that my boyfriend of 2 years has secretly been feeding me meat. His reason is that he thinks it's "funny" that I still call myself a vegetarian afterwards. FML
Today, my boyfriend informed me that in the event of a zombie apocalypse, he'd kill me before I got infected. FML
Today, I was at my boyfriend's house for dinner with his family. His mom cooked up a steak dinner, except that I'm a vegan, but trying to be a good girlfriend, I forced it down. Upon his mother finding out I was a vegan, she called me "disloyal to my beliefs." FML
Today, my boyfriend spent half his paycheck on gourmet steaks, bacon, and all sorts of other meat. When I reminded him we were trying to go meatless to help the planet, he said, "Yeah, I'm done with that. The planet can burn." We'd only been vegan three days. FML
Today, I asked my friend if he’d ever consider going vegan, like me. His response was, and I quote, “Ew, no, I’d rather get shot! How dare you even ask?” A simple “No thanks, I’m not interested” would’ve done just fine, bro. FML
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Top comments
LegendaryJacob7 7
But humans are animals. No?
BRLHP 24
I wonder what his choice would be if it was his life or the cats.
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Comments (128)
calivianya 29
Apparently he's forgotten humans are animals, too. You should sing "The Bad Touch" by The Bloodhound Gang to remind him. "You and me baby ain't nothing but mammals so let's do it like they do on the Discovery Channel!"
dereksmalls1985 7
Breakup time.
TurkeySlab 9
Why the hell is a guy a vegan?!?!?!?!?!?!?
Wilkouak 3
Your vegan friend would make a great steak, so to speak...
haagen3 2
Scientifically you are an Animal.
MikeFoxtrot01594 11
So he would rather kill an animal that is known to be sentient over one who's level of self-awareness is highly questionable?
Derpylicious 3
Your boyfriend is an idiot. Don't waste your time on him.
joetan 16
Technically, humans are part of the animal kingdom. So.. FYL for having an idiot as your bf as well!! >.
Gongi80 5
U need to break up NOW before u end up being a 6 o'clock news story.
UMadBro_87 3
I've a question about veganism. It's my understanding that they avoid animal products because an animal was killed etc etc, but what if the animal died of natural causes, thereby negating the moral implication. I get Jainism etc, where they are vegans because they won't eat something with a soul, fair enough, but what about an animal loving vegan?